My 'What brings me down' post is based on the last twenty-four hours...
It brings me down when diabetes causes the rest of my life to get put on hold...
It brings me down to have to call the parent of one of Arden's friends to explain diabetes...
It brings me down when they don't seem to understand...
It brings me down when I find myself speaking, about the things that person will need to do if Arden is to attend an event, in an apologetic tone...
It brings me down when I realize that the weight of my message wasn't felt...
These things bring me down because it is completely understandable that a diabetes novice wouldn't understand.
It brings me down that Arden's diabetes technology always seems to provide a let down in these situations...
It brings me down when a pump site fails at the most inopportune moment...
It brings me down that the time I was trying to spend with my son got cut short because of the site change...
It brings me down when I have to change a pump in a car...
It brings me down when I have to inject because the pump site failed...
It brings me down that it feels like every time a DexCom sensor fails to keep up with Arden's BG, it's during a moment like this...
It brings me down when I think I'm fighting with a stubborn 200 BG and it's really 430...
It brings me down when Arden doesn't feel well because of that 430...
It brings me down that in the middle of writing this I'm texting with Arden about a rising BG...
It brings me down when Arden feels sick from her BG while she is trying to play softball...
It brings me down when my wife texts me to say that she seems to be struggling because of it...
It brought me down that I wasn't there...
It brought me down when it took me too long to mentally get back to my son...
It brings me down when my wife called me as I was coming home to tell me about a bad BG incident that happened while I was cheering at a baseball game...
It brings me down when Arden is unsafe...
It brings me down when her BG drops so fast...
It brings me down when I look in my wife's eyes as see tells me about it later...
It brings me down to see my family sad...
It makes me happy to write about it here.
Because today is a new day.
Because everyone is fine.
and will be fine.
It's makes me happy to tell you that this was just a bad day, just an unlucky collection of coincidences...
Diabetes can bring you down sometimes but there is no rule about how long you have to stay down. In many ways living with diabetes is like the graph on your CGM screen. Steady mostly, with down and up moments. Some highs last longer than others, some lows hit you hard and some come and go. I guess that most everything in life could be described with those words.
#DBlogWeek