#444 Falling Forward

Growing up with Type 1 Diabetes

Jeff was diagnosed as a child, today as an adult he describes his life with type 1 diabetes.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello everyone, and welcome to Episode 444 of the Juicebox Podcast. This show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries. g evoke hypo Penn, Find out more at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juice box. Today's episode is also sponsored by the Contour Next One blood glucose meter, you can find out more about ardens meter at Contour Next one.com forward slash juicebox. And don't forget about touched by type one. Learn more about that touched by type one.org on Instagram, or Facebook.

Face shows with Jeff. He's a type one who was diagnosed at a younger age, and then had a number of life issues pop up. A lot of them actually, he does a great job of taking us through them and sharing his emotions.

Please remember, while you're listening that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan or becoming bold with insulin. As you're listening around the podcast, don't forget to check out the defining diabetes episodes. And those diabetes pro tip episodes. You can find them both right here in your podcast player, or a diabetes pro tip.com. And of course everything's available at Juicebox. Podcast calm.

Jeff Flaxman 2:07
My name is Jeff flaxman. I'm 34 years old have been type one diabetic since I was 12. If I was better at math, I'd tell you the year but I gotta think back through but I was in sixth grade when it happened around Easter and, and managing it since pretty much by myself. Wow.

Scott Benner 2:24
Yeah. And we'll dig into that in a second. But I have to let you know that every time I see your name pop up on my calendar, the Beatle song tax man runs through my head. So I'm glad. I'm glad you said your letter that makes sense to you that every

Jeff Flaxman 2:36
one last name.

Scott Benner 2:37
I just hear the very like, I'm the tax man. Every time I say it, I'm like, Ah, that's gonna fill my head up now for the next 20 minutes. So I'm glad to get this one out of the way so that I can move. Yeah, we

Jeff Flaxman 2:49
can cross that off your list then

Scott Benner 2:50
and move to a different Beatle song. Anyway, so let's see, you have quite a story, Jeff.

Jeff Flaxman 2:57
Yeah, I've had some ups and downs.

Scott Benner 2:59
Yeah. Where are you now just so that as we get 20 minutes into this people aren't, you know, starting a GoFundMe for you or something like that things? Oh, no, no, no,

Jeff Flaxman 3:08
things are fantastic. Now I'm married my wife, we've been together since 2011. So nine years, I've got a five year old daughter's two year old son, both of which are not diagnosed as of this time with type one, but it's always in the back of my mind. Working successfully, I think I teach Middle School in the middle of a pandemic. So it's a lot of fun. Okay, all right, good.

Scott Benner 3:29
Well, I just wanted to do I, you know, I'm not I don't, I don't want by the time we're done the third part of your story. I don't want everybody to be like, oh my this poor guy. So you're good. So but you still have quite a tail. Alright, so let's start again, you were diagnosed in just a sixth grade. Sixth grade, it

Jeff Flaxman 3:46
was April of God 1234. Sometime in the late

Scott Benner 3:52
90s. Sometime in the late 90s. Excellent. You're in sixth grade. I'm going to do by my thinking on that and say that most people are five and kindergarten. And then six plus five is 11. So I'm going to put you around 11 years old. Okay. All right. seem fair.

Jeff Flaxman 4:08
No, I was 12. Because after my birthday in sixth 12 perfect.

Scott Benner 4:12
All right. Okay, everybody. So Jeff's going along living his life. Happy birthday. They sing the song, they eat the cake, and he gets the diabetes. Do you remember much about the but not what you wish for? Would you blow out the candles? I imagine?

Jeff Flaxman 4:24
No, no, not a bit. No, it was a near Easter. And I remember distinctly is my brother always reminds me of it because my diagnosis fell just before his 15th birthday. So he lets me know I ruined his 15th birthday party by being in the hospital. He couldn't have his friends over couldn't have his party because of me. Yeah.

Scott Benner 4:43
It's nice to have a brother, isn't it? Yeah, I

Jeff Flaxman 4:45
mean, he's a great guy. I do. I love him very much, but that's just our relationship. The diagnosis came on. I had started wrestling at that time, which is a pretty demanding physical sport. And after the season ended, I just kind of crashed like before. I couldn't do much constantly tired and just had one of those, like a week long what I thought was the flu what my mom thought was the flu at that time. So it's just you know, you stay in the couch, you feel awful, miserable, can't get up, can't do anything. But I had to go to the bathroom a lot, because you know, the diabetes. And then at one point, it just got, I guess I was probably close to DK, I don't remember. And I just remember what I was saying. That's it. We're going to the hospital. Let's go. But that's

Scott Benner 5:28
scary for parents. They're really you know, now you have kids, you can really imagine if your kid was just lethargic and lying around, you know, how long before you just were like, Oh, geez, this is this is something

Jeff Flaxman 5:41
terrifying? I don't know. I mean, when my youngest was like three months old, he hit one of those fevers above the doctor level. So we had to take him to the ER two in the morning. And that was a horrifying six hours. I couldn't imagine what this would be for my parents. Yeah.

Scott Benner 5:56
Yeah. The first time your kid gets a high fever, you start imagining their heads soft boiling inside of their skulls. And you're Oh,

Jeff Flaxman 6:02
yeah, I mean, worst case scenario instantly.

Scott Benner 6:05
goes, Yeah, it's interesting how you're, you know, you jumped to the worst conclusion. Well, luckily, your mom jumped to that conclusion that got you to the hospital.

Jeff Flaxman 6:12
Yeah, we got there. And it was I remember that I mean, a wave of doctors swarming around me, and probably within the first minute of being there. I heard him say diabetes. Hmm. And maybe 10 minutes after that I was in an ambulance going to a major hospital, where I met, which I hadn't mentioned is the Chicagoland area. So Lutheran generals were I was folding diagnosed. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 6:33
Okay. Do you remember much about the early days of having type one for you, and what that meant, as far as how you managed and you know

Jeff Flaxman 6:43
why, because I was older at 12, I have a very distinct memory of all of it, it was that time, there was NPH. And our insulin is what I was on, take the long acting in the morning. And then I had like a sliding scale. Throughout the day, depending on what I tested that of what I would do before each meal. Not each meal, I think it was just breakfast and dinner, maybe each meal, one of the two. And you'd take that amount. And that week in the hospital, I didn't really get it at first what it meant. Until I had an older I'm guessing he was an endocrinologist came in and just had one of those sit down, come to Jesus conversations with me and 12. And I distinctly recall, he's like, well, this disease basically cuts your lifespan in half. If you take care of yourself, you can make it a little longer if you don't pay attention right now. You'll be dead before 40

Unknown Speaker 7:36
knows Oh, okay.

Scott Benner 7:39
So he wasn't dressed like a clown or anything like that. He wasn't Oh,

Unknown Speaker 7:43
no, it wasn't a patch

Scott Benner 7:44
that wasn't there that day. He wasn't going for as well. So interesting. He he went for I'll shock you into it, which I've heard from a lot of people is not a valuable management tool from doctors. But how did it work on you, maybe it works perfectly on you. Ah,

Jeff Flaxman 8:00
it worked really well, that honeymoon period, the first few months of having it, I was awesome. at it. Like numbers, were always good constantly testing, writing it down in this little Journal of what we need to have there. And I remember at that time, we didn't go to an endocrinologist, my family doctor took over managing my diabetes care. And they did a great job. Well, you do all the people, they're pretty close. But looking back on it, I want to ask my parents, what the heck are you thinking? Why didn't we go to a real endocrinologist for this stuff for how serious it was? But 12? I didn't know the difference. Sure. But that first one, he came back in the low fives that I had during that honeymoon period to where they're like, Oh, he's so good at this. This is great. Forget testing twice a day, you can probably test three times every two days, and you'll be good. And so that was it. So back then, that was the level of knowledge. And also I guess you're not in an endos office. Right? So yeah, yeah. So I think there's a little delay there for it. But I didn't really have serious lows or serious hires. I mean, it would roller coaster constantly. And now that I have a CGM and I'm using that I I can't imagine what was going on in the in between times, there has to be 36 hours without a check.

Scott Benner 9:16
So you were basically honeymooning, which we all kind of now understand is just a time where your pancreas is just working for a while off and on, like sputtering to its to its end until that organ became useless, right. And the By the way, for the people listening who know that the pancreas still does some things after it doesn't make insulin anymore. I know we all know just

Unknown Speaker 9:38
I know that. I only look at it through the diabetes.

Scott Benner 9:40
Yeah, useless for diabetes, let's call it that. useless for insulin. So but I'm just fascinated by that. The idea that they didn't understand that this was going to, you know, get worse at some point, you know, and your pancreas was not going to be helping anymore, and so they tell you the exact wrong thing. Which is you don't even have to Look that off and just maybe a couple of times every three days when really what you should have been doing is looking more frequently. Right when this happened, and on top of it, it was

Jeff Flaxman 10:08
there. I was being taught to like I was a type two at that time.

Unknown Speaker 10:12
Yeah.

Jeff Flaxman 10:12
You probably say new most being a family practice.

Scott Benner 10:15
Late 90s. Doesn't seem like that long ago to me

Jeff Flaxman 10:20
that long either. But I'm 34 now 12.

Scott Benner 10:24
Just like it is not long ago. I'm halfway to old.

Jeff Flaxman 10:28
Sunday. It's not really

Scott Benner 10:29
No, no, there's once in a while I get up in the morning and my heel and my ankle hurt. And I think, how did that happen?

Jeff Flaxman 10:37
Do I can't place this this bruise. I don't know where it came from.

Scott Benner 10:41
I wasn't running yesterday or anything like that. Like, you know, I didn't jump off of something. I didn't kick anything. It's just doesn't seem right. But no, I mean, I hear you. I'm just saying that. I guess even for me, as somebody who talks to people a lot about this, if you tell me late 90s. There's going to be somebody who diagnoses you in a hospital doesn't insist that you go to an endocrinologist, send you to a GP who doesn't appear to understand diabetes really at all. I just that feels like it would be an older problem. But I'm assuming that stuff still happening. And we just don't think of it that way.

Jeff Flaxman 11:18
I mean, it probably does in some places where it's still there. Yeah. It's medical care is not exactly consistent across the 50 states.

Scott Benner 11:25
No kidding. Okay, so there you go here, do you? Do you then slip into this idea of we'll just look every once in a while. And then what happens then? Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 11:33
I mean, that's what it became, like, Oh, I guess that's okay. So at that point, I'm probably four or five months in, I start, I'm still testing those times a day. But I stopped writing them down because I'm a kid. I'm 12. And I'm not taking the time to do that. Yeah. So I just stopped. And I mean, the the weird thing, we'll get to it, but my parents being divorced, we're not on the same page with that. And they took a very hands off approach and like, well, he's got it. The doctor says his numbers are good. So he can handle it. And I did. And they didn't know anybody else with Type One Diabetes. So there's nothing to compare it to. Right. Right. They had no idea. They heard what they heard from the general practitioner, and he said, things are doing well. He's taking care of himself, we're not concerned.

Scott Benner 12:17
And so that's that.

Jeff Flaxman 12:19
They just my mom, dad, like, well, he seems to have it under control. They had an idea of what was going on. But meal times, I would do the sliding scale correction, I would give all my injections since the day I was diagnosed, they never did those for me. Just

Scott Benner 12:34
that's how it worked. Were they checking in a one See,

Unknown Speaker 12:38
um,

Jeff Flaxman 12:39
the general practitioner did. But I couldn't tell you what the numbers were after that first one, I just know The first one was really low. And then it might have been every six months they check and they won't see after that.

Scott Benner 12:49
But you don't recall anyone saying to you, Hey, this is getting out of hand, or

Jeff Flaxman 12:53
I don't think they ever did. I mean, there were times I might have gotten to low eights type area. throughout those young junior high and early high school years. We'll get to it the story gets more complex, and then a one c testing stops, eventually we'll get to that. Yeah.

Scott Benner 13:08
Well, I just think that I'm trying to I don't know, obviously, but the ADA sets standards for a one C, and doctors who know and doctors who don't know are probably following that they probably just look at that test and go, you know, like, you don't I mean, like you and I now think of a one c? You know, as one of the one of the measurements we use to try to figure out if we're doing a reasonable job, man is

Jeff Flaxman 13:34
a decent benchmark nowadays.

Scott Benner 13:36
Right? Right. But but the I guess my point is, is that it's making me think about like, your story is making me think about Arden being diagnosed with hypothyroidism where there's this range that it says is normal. And I don't know if people understand where normal range comes from for like, you know, your thyroid test, for instance, but it's just a most people tested, fall between here and here. And that makes this the range. So if your number falls in that range, many doctors will just look and say, Oh, you know, the range is, I don't know, five to 10 urinate, you're good. That's it, just you know that that's how it works when when they don't have a real drill down understanding of what they're looking at. They're just really looking at a number from a test and a number on a chart and you fall into that number and I'm wondering how much of that didn't happen to you and doesn't still happen to people where maybe back then the ADA had a once he said it eight or I don't know where

Jeff Flaxman 14:35
I couldn't tell you what it was seen eights in there like sometimes he would say well, you seem to be going a little higher and maybe you should check your blood two hours after you ate a meal.

Scott Benner 14:47
That was it. Like Like a let's see looks a little higher. Let's test a little more frequently.

Jeff Flaxman 14:52
The you want it to be about 150 to 180 after a meal and my 13 year old stupid kid brain there's like yeah, oh Okay, I'll do that every third day. Maybe

Scott Benner 15:03
we'll make that a Thursday thing. And no, I hear so okay, just you know, in perspective like that's it now I don't even know where the you know the quote unquote like the recommended a one C, is it seven now or something like that I'm not even sure.

Jeff Flaxman 15:21
I couldn't tell you I'd imagine seven me my endocrinologist now who I have a good relationship with. I'm in the low sixes running there, and he seems pleased with what's going on. And I'm happy Of course, I'd like to do better, but I'll take a low six.

Scott Benner 15:34
Okay. Yeah, I'm googling right now. I have 2018 here.

This is the actually diabetes.org. So this is the ADA.

Oh, they're just giving you the if you're able to see has been between 5.7 and 6.5. This is probably for type two people. You're pre diabetic. If you have a one save Six, five or higher. You are diabetic health line has from 2018. For years, the American Diabetes Association has recommended that all people with IBS aim for target a one c below 7%. Even more stringent. They're not recommending below. So in 2018, they started recommending below 6.5. But for a while it was seven. I wonder what it was prior is maybe the internet doesn't go back quite far enough on this one for me.

Jeff Flaxman 16:34
Somewhere, but I mean, yeah. Or to a point where there is serious concern.

Scott Benner 16:38
Right? Right. Right. Now here you Okay, so you're chugging along. This is basically how you're living your life with with diabetes.

Jeff Flaxman 16:46
Yeah, I mean, I was carb counting didn't exist then. Or at least not where I was trained. So I was on an exchange diet. So starch, protein, fat, and I was very, and still to this day, very regimented in what I would eat, where I would have the exact same breakfast every day for like two years straight and never change it.

Scott Benner 17:03
Did you ever, like hate that? Or was it just the thing you did? I

Jeff Flaxman 17:09
think I did it first. But it got to a point where it just became so ingrained in me. Even now I'll make my lunch for school, it would be the exact same lunch every single day. I mean, breakfast today was the same as it was the past 20 days, English muffin with peanut butter and coffee and that's just what I go.

Scott Benner 17:30
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I so would love to rerun your life in an alternate reality and see if that's how you if you just love eating like that or if it it's just from the diabetes because I do know people like that I've worked with people who every day they eat the same exact thing and I'm just like it's fine. acid

Jeff Flaxman 20:00
is what I love it. It's just that's, that's normal to me. Yeah, that's what I did my childhood. And the only places it changes is dinnertime because those are more robust meals in our family and even as a child, it was gotcha. Then I would always have highs or lows after dinner because the meal was never consistent, but it never fit.

Scott Benner 20:17
Right, right. So what would you consider to be the first I'm looking for the right word. I don't want to say tragedy, but maybe tragedy is the right way. What, what, what?

Unknown Speaker 20:28
What was let's start going down that rabbit hole.

Scott Benner 20:30
Yeah, what was the first major hiccup I guess, in your life.

Jeff Flaxman 20:35
So we'll backtrack a little bit there. So sixth grade, I get diagnosed, we go all the way back to second grade in school. So four years earlier, my parents split up separated with and it's in the mid 90s. That wasn't that uncommon at that time. Lots of kids had it. And I think in no disrespect at all, but the best way to describe my mother was a sometimes functional alcoholic, I think is the best way to say it. Okay.

Scott Benner 21:02
So meaning that sometimes she was blackout drunk.

Jeff Flaxman 21:06
Yes. Sometimes she was out of it. And in second grade I, I was well aware of what was going on at that time. I know my dad would kind of hint and asks, How is mom today? And we'd say, Oh, it's a good day. It's a rough day. type thing.

Unknown Speaker 21:17
I tell you, Jeff, there were other girls, but this is the one I fell in love with. Sorry, buddy. Yeah, I

Unknown Speaker 21:24
mean, I

Jeff Flaxman 21:25
never got that into it. My dad was trying the whole custody battle for it. But again, it's the mid to early 90s. Dads don't win custody battles very often. Right? It just it wasn't gonna happen. He was probably a more qualified parent looking back at it.

Scott Benner 21:40
Can I? Can I ask you real quick? How involved? Were you in the drinking? Like, did she did you? Were you pouring drinks or

Jeff Flaxman 21:48
bringing mommy I was never She. She always tried to mask it and hide. Okay. My brother and I brothers older. We always knew like we were well aware. And there were times as I got older, it got pretty confrontational where I would find her bottle of wine and just dump it in the sink and be a fight. And I'm an 11 year old kid doing this. Yeah. Like I'm not dealing with this today.

Scott Benner 22:10
And that really is how I felt like if I get rid of this wine today, it'll be easier.

Jeff Flaxman 22:13
Yeah, today, it'll be easier. Yeah. It was kind of a constant. But by no means Was she a bad mother. I mean, we still had food on our plate. Every dinner we were still taking care of and well, we weren't rich by any means. But you weren't poor.

Scott Benner 22:25
But she was struggling with alcoholism. Like very mightily

Jeff Flaxman 22:29
other substances to she she likes to she smokes quite a bit.

Unknown Speaker 22:32
She saw. That

Scott Benner 22:34
was the least of her. I just have to ask you. Yeah, maybe I don't maybe you made it clear. Just you're just talking about weed, right? Oh, yeah, totally. Yeah. Okay. All right. So

Jeff Flaxman 22:43
then I, it was explained to me. Oh, shoot this layer. That's fine, though. It was African violence we had growing in our backyard sometimes. Oh,

Scott Benner 22:51
is that how it was? Told you?

Jeff Flaxman 22:53
Yeah, that's what it was. It's like, Yeah, okay. I'm sure that's what it is.

Scott Benner 22:56
I have one on my windowsill in my kitchen. I hope my kids don't want they believe that I was running a small train. Don't let them listen to this. They might get confused about that. God, if my kids end up listening to this, I'm dead and they just miss me. Okay, sorry.

Jeff Flaxman 23:15
I'm pretty scarred to this. Now, but that's fine. No, Jeff. I

Unknown Speaker 23:18
didn't mean I didn't mean not thinking okay. All right.

Jeff Flaxman 23:22
No, so the divorce was probably the early one. And that that was rough to deal with. But I had gotten used to it. Like I just grew to accept. That's what it is every other weekend and Wednesdays are with my dad. Other days. I'm with my mom. We live in the same town. It's constant. Like those two, it's those the type of divorce where you didn't want to be in the same room as the two.

Scott Benner 23:43
Yeah, my parents had

Unknown Speaker 23:45
co parenting

Scott Benner 23:46
as you'd say today, right? No, my parents had one of those. And I felt like it. It was really difficult on me for a large number of years. And oh, yeah, it didn't, it just it doesn't just go away. Whenever, you know, everybody settles into their new life. It wasn't it definitely wasn't like that. I think I've told people before here, like I used to wake up in the middle of the night and stare out a window on the second floor. And every time a car would drive by, and the lights would appear before the car would appear. I would let myself believe That was my dad coming home. So I could feel better for a couple of seconds before, before the car would drive past the house. And back to like, you know, harder than that would lead me downstairs to dig into the back of a coat closet, the plot of family portrait that my mom hidden, I would just stare at it for a little while till I felt better and go to bed. And I was only like maybe 13 then. So that was you know, I don't think people understand what they mean when they say we're gonna get divorced. It'll be better for the kids. Actually, what would be better for the kids if you stop yelling at each other and

Unknown Speaker 24:49
just figured it

Scott Benner 24:54
would be better together? Yeah, get me out of here and then do your thing. Whatever you're gonna do, you've been in it this long. But anyway,

Jeff Flaxman 25:04
if the divorce was the constant that happened, we knew it was there. My dad had a constant battle to try and win custody. And it's just, it wasn't in the cards for whatever reason. Maybe a mom had a better lawyer, I don't really know, I was too young to understand that she kind of kept us out of it. It just never happened.

Scott Benner 25:22
And, and you were about how old while this is going on just because I'm trying to move. So

Jeff Flaxman 25:28
second grade. I think you're eight or nine, somewhere in that range.

Scott Benner 25:34
It's all up and so your dad kind of gives up on the custody thing at some point in that eight, nine year range? Well, no, he never gave Oh, no. No kid with a constant constant

Jeff Flaxman 25:44
fight. Like eventually, it got to the point where he'd get a whole week, a month on top of all that, or half the summer he got more and more visitation and stuff and we keep fighting for it, but never never got the overall win. Wow. He

Scott Benner 25:56
really was trying. That's great. Yeah, yeah. Good for him. Well, that's, that's lovely, actually. Okay, so we're gonna go forward. Yeah. We're gonna call divorce. Tragedy one, I think we're gonna call diabetes tragedy, too. Yeah. Third,

Jeff Flaxman 26:12
when we move forward to eighth grade, I'm pretty well managed by now. Things are going well. My dad started the online dating world. And you know, AOL, if you remember that you go to your message board. So he was a single parent message board and found a bunch of girls started talking to them instant messaging before there was he online dating eHarmony. He found some girlfriend that way. He just he was, she had four boys of her own. And then they were end of eighth grade year, they bought a house, they were gonna move in together. Me and my brother are four step brothers, all of us. We're going to be together.

Scott Benner 26:50
For a while. We're going to move in, like full time. We're not just just, yeah. So just the time that he had you for Okay.

Jeff Flaxman 26:58
Yes. Well, it makes it messy. My brother who was 17 could have moved into full time. He could have gone to court and said I'm done with you, Mom, I believe in. But he didn't

Scott Benner 27:08
stand behind for you. Did you ever think you guys were talking about it?

Jeff Flaxman 27:12
We did. And eventually we'll see. He made the choice to leave.

Scott Benner 27:15
Yeah. I it's hard not to everything. Oh, yeah. And

Jeff Flaxman 27:21
may, April, May of that eighth grade year before graduation? My dad gets diagnosed with lung cancer.

Unknown Speaker 27:28
Yeah. Okay.

Scott Benner 27:31
Well, I guess let's just hit the Was it a shock to him? Or, you know, was he a smoker and was like, Oh, I got

Jeff Flaxman 27:38
heavy heavy smoker, work construction. So you've got both of those working against them. Right? how all of us were caught off guard by No kidding.

Scott Benner 27:46
How old was he around that? 4747. Okay, so a young man ends up with lung cancer double, or do you remember?

Jeff Flaxman 27:54
It was one but it was stage three at the time? I think four.

Scott Benner 27:59
So how does he talk to you about that?

Jeff Flaxman 28:02
Um, just kind of sat us down and told us he's like, Look, this is it. I'm gonna do the chemo. We're gonna move through it. And we're optimistic.

Scott Benner 28:11
Yeah. How much understanding Did you have that? It might not? end? Well for him?

Jeff Flaxman 28:17
I'm about a month and a half in,

Unknown Speaker 28:20
we figured it out.

Unknown Speaker 28:22
Could you just see him declining?

Jeff Flaxman 28:24
Oh, it was it was quick. Yeah. got diagnosed. And then three months later, and the summer he passed. Okay.

Scott Benner 28:32
Ah, all right. So how does that one mean, I guess I'm it's hard. I'm running through it in my head. I guess the biggest impact to you besides your dad being gone, which was obviously the largest impact is that you're now with your mom full time and there's nowhere to go right? Or does the orders. Did your dad ever get married to the woman that he was what he

Jeff Flaxman 28:51
did? He got married to my stepmom and she stayed.

Scott Benner 28:55
Okay. So did you continue to see her?

Jeff Flaxman 28:59
Well, the court said we couldn't, but I just did it anyways.

Scott Benner 29:05
Were you like living close enough to each other that you could make your way?

Jeff Flaxman 29:09
It wasn't the same district so it would be from school. So I went to high school. Some days I tell my mom, I'm staying at my stuff. I'm staying and I'd stay there. And then the next day I take the bus back home my mom's house and go back and forth. It was freshman year.

Scott Benner 29:26
Did your mom fight you on that? Or do you think it was like he gave her the night off?

Unknown Speaker 29:30
She loose functioning she

Jeff Flaxman 29:32
had lost a lot more control the disease by them first. Okay. All right. She been further and further. How is

Scott Benner 29:39
all this impacting your, your type one care? Like I'm trying to imagine you fitting that into all of that chaos?

Jeff Flaxman 29:47
It was rough. Like I mean, I still because I was so regimented. I still followed I eat this at this time I do this testing. I stopped testing as much I had One kind of scary low spell, I remember that my brother woke me up out of. And then here drink this orange juice, you moron, you'll be fine. That mean, besides that one low it was, I'm not gonna say it was well managed, but to my knowledge at the time it was well,

Scott Benner 30:17
so you're up to your expectations. So what

Unknown Speaker 30:20
was that go into? What

Scott Benner 30:21
was that really the focus that? Don't get dizzy don't pass out. And you're doing well?

Jeff Flaxman 30:27
Yeah, I mean, I can tell when it was really, really high blood sugar because the urination and everything which now I realize, Oh, that's just because ketones was spilling over and my my liver is slowly killing myself right now.

Scott Benner 30:38
Hmm. So you didn't correct those situations though, right? You just knew your blood sugar. No, the idea

Jeff Flaxman 30:42
of a corrective Bolus just didn't cross my mind. And I say Bolus, but that doesn't. It wasn't a Bolus didn't cross my mind. Like if I was high. I'm like, Alright, so I take a little more in the sliding scale. I'll check again in the morning. And I waited up. That was

Scott Benner 30:57
it. So it's, it's next time I'll be a little more aggressive because I can because I'm peeing a lot right now. And I know I'm high.

Jeff Flaxman 31:03
Yeah. So I know, I need to take more at the next meal. I'll bump up that sliding scale. And I think, gosh, by that time, I wasn't mph. And our I don't know if you know they had that like 7030 blend, or is like the mix. And I was taking that one at that time through a pen, which was much more convenient.

Scott Benner 31:19
Wow. It's so interesting that your experience with diabetes mirrors my friend Mike's So specifically, I'm I'm always going to be sorry that I didn't get him on here to talk about it. But he passed away last year. Oh, I'm

Unknown Speaker 31:32
terribly sorry. No, no,

Scott Benner 31:34
I thank you. But he he is experienced, it's just so like it. It makes me feel like this was just the time with diabetes. And this is just how it was done. And and I know

Jeff Flaxman 31:46
there was better because I know pump technology was starting to come out. I mean, this is my dad passed in 2000. So the early stages. I mean, they've been there for a while, but they're starting to become more and more mainstream at that time.

Scott Benner 31:59
Okay, but but nobody was talking. Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 32:02
it just wasn't even brought up that idea. Wasn't there? Like I'd heard about it in the magazine. Like that's stupid. I don't want to be a robot.

Scott Benner 32:09
Yeah. Okay. All right. Okay. All right, Jeff. Yeah, let me wrap my head around this for a second throwing a morning. Cheese. Sometimes I do these more midday and I'm a little more awake. I'm not not awake right now. But it's, um, you know, this is the part in the show where, you know, like a secondary character comes in and has like a happy moment so that we all don't look for a window to jump out and

Unknown Speaker 32:37
we'll get there. Yeah. Okay.

Scott Benner 32:41
I'm sorry about your father, your father passes away from lung cancer. Sounds quick. Not that this matters. But Mike's dad passed away from cancer around the same time very quickly. He says, I'm just now realizing that I met my wife in probably around 94. ish. And she was still in college. And I remember being I was visiting her. She went to college about an hour and a half away. And I think everyone knows what I mean. When I say I was visiting Kelly at college. I was visiting Kellyanne Conway,

Jeff Flaxman 33:15
you guys are playing straight like it

Scott Benner 33:17
get what right? Yeah, we were just go fish a lot of times, and then right to charades. Then I would go home. And Mike called and said, Excuse me. My dad has cancer. He thought he had a hernia. So he went to the doctor. And I remember Mike going and he did have a hernia. I was like, okay, yes, but he also had non Hodgkins lymphoma. And he went from like this big robust guy, to just, I mean, he shrunk to a shrunk away and died. And in two months, you know. And yeah, it was it was really something. And Mike's mom passed away a number of years later from cancer as well. But anyway, I remember driving feverish Lee home through like a state and a half to get to Mike to talk to him. And it had to have been just a couple years before you were experiencing this. But at a younger age, Mike and I were We were in our early 20s. At that point, anyway. Okay, so you're trying your best to stay with your stepmother as much as you can. Your mom? Yeah, I mean, it's lining.

Jeff Flaxman 34:26
It's a rough mix, because at that time, my brother was a senior in high school, and he just moved out of my mom's house, he never went back.

Scott Benner 34:33
Okay. And for all the reasons for all imagining,

Jeff Flaxman 34:36
yeah, so he and I talked a lot. And we communicate. We both did the same sports in school on the same teams. But he just said, I'm not going back there. And I had to,

Scott Benner 34:47
yeah, was there ever any conversation of like, I wish you could come with me.

Jeff Flaxman 34:52
Or if we didn't, we kept our emotions to yourself. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 34:58
We're not to this point. matters. But where does the senior in high school go to live when he leaves his house?

Unknown Speaker 35:05
When he left my stepmom,

Scott Benner 35:06
he Oh, he actually went there and she Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 35:08
okay, you just stay there. We all had rooms there. He just stayed and never left and my mom was too far down that alcohol pipe. She couldn't fight it.

Scott Benner 35:17
Gotcha. I understand. What's it like living at home with your mom by yourself?

Unknown Speaker 35:25
Um,

Jeff Flaxman 35:26
it was hectic. But that's the best way to say it. It was rough. I, we had gotten to a point we understood each other pretty well, we still would joke and have fun. And I just knew like, well, you're drinking so I'm gonna play video games or hang out with my friends or do my own thing. I'll wake up when I need to catch the bus by myself. I I had it figured out by them.

Scott Benner 35:47
And I'll get older one day, and I'll leave like my brother did.

Unknown Speaker 35:49
Right. And like, and

Jeff Flaxman 35:50
eventually I'll just get older. And that'll be the end of it.

Scott Benner 35:52
I see. Was she working?

Unknown Speaker 35:56
Yes.

Scott Benner 35:58
Trying to imagine how you're getting your medical

Jeff Flaxman 36:00
blueprint company. She worked in ran blueprints that have prints art supply store?

Scott Benner 36:05
I say okay, so enough that she could pay for your insulin and that sort of stuff.

Jeff Flaxman 36:09
Yeah. Well, my father's Carpenter union, like insurance kept and then the all that pension stuff. So money was there for my brother. Okay,

Scott Benner 36:19
okay. Were you in charge of going, like, making doctor's appointments and getting your medications and things like that?

Jeff Flaxman 36:26
No, that again, that's the functional part. She still kept all that together.

Scott Benner 36:30
Okay. She's trying. I mean, I guess for people who don't under like, don't see alcoholism, as a, as a disease would probably be like, what, you know, how could you do this, but she's in her lucid moments, doing her best to take care of what she thinks of as your most pressing needs. Correct. Gotcha. Wow, that's really kind of pretty beautiful, you know, in a strange, strange way.

Jeff Flaxman 36:54
Yeah. in a weird way, but it is. Not. I

Scott Benner 36:56
mean, you know what I mean? Like, it's just, I mean, imagine, imagine having a couple of minutes of looseness, you know, in a day, and when that happens, your your responsibility kicks in, you say, you know, I have to get Jeff, insulin and stuff like that. That's really, um, it's a it's a, it's an interesting look into, into what it feels like to have a kid I guess, you know, even when you're strung because you, you know, it's, it really is interesting, right? If your mom had some sort of adult debilitating cancer that wasn't going to kill her, for example, and she only had a couple hours a day where she could function. No one listening would think, oh, how could she do that? They'd be like, Wow, what a hero. You know,

Jeff Flaxman 37:42
when they relate to the alcohol, that's the stigma connected to the disease. Right?

Scott Benner 37:45
Right. Yeah. Something. Okay. All right, Jeff. Let's not, let's not how much longer Does your mom last?

Jeff Flaxman 37:53
Well, about a year. Okay. She gets into a pedestrian accident crossing the road gets hit by a guy.

Scott Benner 38:02
Well, I wasn't expecting that, Jeff. Yeah, it was rough. Wow. I'm sorry. Ah, I you know, I just felt like we were building to you know, something else. Oh, my God.

Unknown Speaker 38:15
No, it was quick.

Scott Benner 38:16
Were you with you weren't with her. Were you know, No,

Jeff Flaxman 38:19
I wasn't home. She went out and Oh,

Scott Benner 38:23
my God. Now you're by yourself. How old?

Jeff Flaxman 38:26
Um, shoot me thinking that sophomore? I would have been

Unknown Speaker 38:32
15

Scott Benner 38:33
Are you okay? By the way while we're talking?

Jeff Flaxman 38:36
It's coming and going.

Unknown Speaker 38:37
I'll be right. Okay.

Scott Benner 38:39
I just listened for everybody else. This was Jeff's idea. Okay, he reached out to me. I'm not torturing him. He wanted to be on the boat. I did this to myself. Yeah, exactly. Well, you know, Oh, my God. Oh, that's terrible. Okay, so, who handles a funeral when there's a 15 year old at home and a senior in high school? Who's not living at home? Like, is that follows family plan? Yeah, family came in. When that happens. Is there any noise from your sister? Like, I'm gonna take care of you now from her sister about like, who like was there a will like who you left to?

Jeff Flaxman 39:17
Well, that was the elephant in the room. That was the weird thing. I was at the hospital because the police came brought me there. And they asked who can we call? So I knew we had family friends that were close. And I said call them

Scott Benner 39:31
yeah. You really didn't even feel like you had anybody left right.

Jeff Flaxman 39:37
Yeah, that form I stepped out there with the two but brain just didn't go to step on that time. It went to my family friends. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 39:44
Okay. Were you in a home were you renting? No, it was

Jeff Flaxman 39:51
a home my parents owned Okay, we're not own the bank owned it but we were there making payments.

Scott Benner 39:57
What happens to that house is it just get absorbed by the bank?

Jeff Flaxman 40:02
Um, no, my aunt put together everything and sold it.

Unknown Speaker 40:07
She was and that

Scott Benner 40:09
money goes to I'm assuming debt and then to you and your brother

Jeff Flaxman 40:12
debt first so most of it debt and the rest was split between my brother.

Unknown Speaker 40:17
Okay? Wow

Jeff Flaxman 40:21
I'm my brother's in college so he can't afford a house or anything and he's going through what a college freshman goes through so he's got his own hobbies you call him out in school? All right. Well not bad but you know the college experience.

Scott Benner 40:35
Yeah, no, I understand. Yeah, there's he's, he's focused on other things. And where do you go to live? That family

Jeff Flaxman 40:43
I went home with that night I just they took me on. Wow, that's

Scott Benner 40:49
that do you bounce around from there? Because, you know, I

Jeff Flaxman 40:53
actually stay with them. I don't keep traveling back and forth to my mom's at that time.

Scott Benner 40:57
Okay. It was was your mom's death the end of your relationship with your stepmother?

Jeff Flaxman 41:05
No, no, I was with her. She comes into the store again, I'm

Scott Benner 41:07
a little bit worried. Okay. Geez, you really should write all this down, by the way, cuz this isn't

Unknown Speaker 41:13
nice. I've tried

Scott Benner 41:15
at least a season and a half of the Friday Night Lights TV show for one of the characters so you could kind of there I can see it. Yeah, no kidding. We just put a football game around this and some sad music. And I think we'd be okay,

Jeff Flaxman 41:27
Texas, playing in the Qatar summer. And I

Unknown Speaker 41:29
really feel like this would work. Like goodness.

Jeff Flaxman 41:34
A new family takes me in Yeah. They try to understand diabetes, they transition me to a new doctor. The benefit at this time because I'm technically an orphan, I guess you'd say free healthcare from the state that that's

Scott Benner 41:48
finally something good happens.

Jeff Flaxman 41:50
program. Everything's covered. I'd pay a dime for anything ever.

Scott Benner 41:54
Does that lead you to? When do you get to a more modern way of management? When do you start counting carbs? And oh, God,

Jeff Flaxman 42:03
not till after college?

Scott Benner 42:04
No kidding. Okay. All right. It's like

Jeff Flaxman 42:05
2000 to 2008 2009 when I started counting carbs, and we're only in 2001 right now.

Scott Benner 42:12
So these next few years, are you living with this family who bring who brought you in and finishing high school?

Jeff Flaxman 42:17
I lived with them for a year. And then they had a family strife, a divorce there. And I just said, You know what, I don't need this again. And we agreed I just moved in with my stepmom for the rest of high school there. She took me

Scott Benner 42:28
was that was that traumatic to watch the family that took you in? start experiencing the things where your life started to unwind years earlier?

Unknown Speaker 42:37
Not really.

Unknown Speaker 42:39
No, you weren't?

Unknown Speaker 42:40
I think I'd

Unknown Speaker 42:41
become numb to it by that.

Scott Benner 42:42
Okay. And so I have to ask you at this point, are you doing anything to help yourself that? I shouldn't have said Help yourself. But are you? are you managing your pain anyway? Are you doing drugs? Are you drinking? Like, are you how are you handling everything that's happening to you?

Jeff Flaxman 43:00
None of it I I started working a part time job at a local restaurant and just I focused myself on work on school on sports, and that was my escape.

Scott Benner 43:12
And that's just sort of your personality to this day.

Jeff Flaxman 43:15
I mean, I drink now so but I'm also 34. But I know I never went in. I guess the call that the amazing part. I just never saw that as an option. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 43:26
Well, that's excellent. I doesn't occur to me. My life's not been great. A lot of different junctures. And I don't I've never I've never been into numbing myself ever. And I don't know. I'm not I'm not morally opposed to it. If you know what I mean. And I just did yeah. And I just don't, and I never have like even I'll tell you right now I'm I turned 49 the other day. If I've had the equivalent of a case of beer in the last 30 years, I would say that's probably an over exaggeration. Oh, good. No, yeah. I just it just does not occur to me to do and I don't

Jeff Flaxman 44:04
at that time, that my age of 1516 1718 up through high school. I never touched the stuff. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 44:11
I'm friends were you just it was just friends and work and just young friends.

Jeff Flaxman 44:18
Sports, some video games here and there.

Scott Benner 44:20
And take care your diabetes.

Jeff Flaxman 44:22
Oh, wasn't perfect in school, but maintained right?

Scott Benner 44:26
GPA? Hmm, is this how do you how do you decide that you want to be a teacher? When does that pop into your head?

Jeff Flaxman 44:33
Um, throughout late high school, I had some good teachers there and I'm like, wow, these guys get it. They talked to me like I'm an adult and I think I could do this. Wow. Okay.

Scott Benner 44:43
And is it a conscious feeling of like, there are gonna be other kids like me one day and they're gonna need somebody like these people.

Jeff Flaxman 44:50
Well, that's a lot of it's like, I can reach an audience of kids. Most teachers can't, because they don't have the shared experience. Right.

Scott Benner 44:57
Are you still in the Chicago area Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 45:00
we're in the northwest suburbs there. So about a, I don't know, 4050 miles out of the city. Okay. All right.

Scott Benner 45:08
So you go to college for you get into college

Jeff Flaxman 45:13
at Eastern Illinois. So down here you buy champagne. And start as a history major, because I loved history. But early on, I realized the heck am I going to do with a history degree? I mean, that's not really a applicable job skill. And I'm sorry, to anyone who's listening. But I don't know what you do with a history degree besides become a professor or a teacher. So that's the world I went.

Scott Benner 45:35
Yeah. Yeah, I guess poetry maybe would be along there to

Jeff Flaxman 45:39
possibly it's in there.

Scott Benner 45:41
Although Wouldn't it be nice to just pick something like that and just sort of lose yourself studying,

Jeff Flaxman 45:46
get through historic documents understand the past and make a living wage doing it? It would have been great, but it just wasn't feasible, not how it works. Yeah.

Scott Benner 45:54
Do you meet your wife in college?

Jeff Flaxman 45:57
I do. We meet early on in high school in college freshman year. And hit it off pretty well dated the whole time through and kind of ever since. So we've been together since 2004. How slowly

Scott Benner 46:08
do disseminate your life story to someone when you meet them like this?

Jeff Flaxman 46:12
Ah, just sprinkle it in. It's like a little bit of salt on a meal there. You don't want to dump it all at once because it ruins it. They get sprinkled in here and there. Yeah,

Scott Benner 46:18
just your six eight months in and you're just like, Oh, you know, like that time my dad got cancer and then you just roll right past. She's like, wait, what do you say?

Jeff Flaxman 46:26
You just drop a little bit and I told her that the big parts of it their parents deceased and all that but kept the details out of it for

Scott Benner 46:33
No kidding. I would make sure she was pretty locked down before I started telling Rob

Jeff Flaxman 46:37
didn't want to scare him away too fast. I'm lucky she decided to stay with me anyways, so I got

the keep that one say without all this. You're saying? Oh yeah, I mean, just my personality and kind of a don't budge. I'm stubborn. And you know what? standard guy thing and she's the same? Yeah. No, I

Scott Benner 46:53
I always wonder when Kelly's gonna grow tired of all this and just be like, Alright, that's enough, buddy. Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 47:01
this was fun while it lasted.

Scott Benner 47:03
We've had this conversation one too many times. But no, no, that's okay. So you guys meet in college? And does she I'm not looking for where she works. But she have a similar path that she

Jeff Flaxman 47:16
does. Yeah, she's a teacher. Also, she taught for a while. She stays at home with the kids now for a second was born. She taught the elementary grades. So kindergarten and second.

Scott Benner 47:25
Teachers seem to fit together really well.

Jeff Flaxman 47:27
We do. One bonus of this. This COVID time here. My daughter started kindergarten and thank god my wife was a kindergarten teacher.

Scott Benner 47:36
Yes. So she's just so your your poor daughter is getting some one on one attention. Hmm.

Jeff Flaxman 47:41
Yeah, she's, uh, that poor girls gonna be impacted too much by she,

Scott Benner 47:45
she won't know anything. She's just like, I don't know, my mom just pulled out a bunch of papers. And we started going.

Jeff Flaxman 47:51
And we empty the crawlspace and built a little classroom in our dining room the other day. That's really nice.

Scott Benner 47:56
Okay, so you're out of college. Now?

Jeff Flaxman 48:00
Well, in college is where it gets messy to wait, hold

Scott Benner 48:02
on, I'm sorry, something else is gonna happen.

Unknown Speaker 48:05
Not bad, but

Jeff Flaxman 48:06
the insurance and stuff. This is where when I was less than 18 years old, the state covered everything.

Unknown Speaker 48:13
Okay. But

Jeff Flaxman 48:14
as I turn 18, the state does not cover my medicine.

Scott Benner 48:18
And you're in college.

Jeff Flaxman 48:19
And I'm in college and insulin prices aren't what they are now. But they were still expensive. Sure. Well, how do I get the whole like school insurance? Can I get on yours? And like, Well, you could but there's not enough kids that are part of it. Your insulin would not be any cheaper here than it is retail at the store.

Unknown Speaker 48:36
What do you ended up doing?

Unknown Speaker 48:38
I paid for it.

Unknown Speaker 48:40
You were working while you were in school.

Jeff Flaxman 48:43
I was a resident assistant for two years there. And then I stayed summers on campus to work there that whole time and just worked my way through. I mean, I got a lot of grants because of my situation having no parental income. So school was relatively covered by grants and all that was able to skate by

Scott Benner 49:02
by so I'm going to take a detour for a second and ask you sort of a bigger question. Sure. I sometimes look back on my life. I was adopted like it, you know, in the in the first days of my life, my parents divorced when I was young. I became sort of my de facto father for my two younger brothers. I watched my mom struggle I got jobs in places where I didn't fit like I used to work in a sheetmetal shop and I'm not a sheetmetal worker, but I went and I did it you know for five years. Making people listening now would be shocked by this but i think i think i got that job at for 25 an hour. And by the time I left it five years later, I believe I was making 575 an hour so it was a real you know real moneymaker for me.

Jeff Flaxman 49:51
It's a good percentage growth though. If you look at it that way.

Scott Benner 49:53
If you look at it that way, I was really on my way to something. Probably by the time I was 60. I would have been making somewhere in the seven Are $8 range? Nice? Yeah. Oh no, for sure. Really hard work, tough extreme conditions. I didn't belong there not meaning like I was too good for it or anything like that just I didn't have the skill set. I didn't grow up around people who worked with their hands. That I was wrong, I was out, I was a fish out of water. I left that I'm still on the hook to, you know, I used to tease my brothers, I was like, my kids are gonna be great, because I've made every conceivable mistake with you guys. So now I can I can look back and see what's going on. Anyway, there's a trial by fire nature to my life. And there certainly is to yours like you, your life actually makes my life seem like I was part of the Brady Bunch. So how valuable do you think that is? Now as an adult with kids? The struggle?

Jeff Flaxman 50:51
It's tough. Because I, I want to raise them the way I know. But my experience there is they're not shared by other people. So what I think of it, this is what you have to do. These are the essentials. Apparently, I guess I'm asking a lot of my kids at times like, well, this is just what you have to do. There is no choice type thing.

Scott Benner 51:09
So it's skewed. Obviously skewed your understanding of like family life and your that's probably something that you have to work through everyday. But what about you, you personally like? Are you a tough person? Like, could I just pick you up and take you to another country and drop you alone? Where you didn't speak the language? You think you just be okay.

Unknown Speaker 51:28
I'd probably survive. Yeah,

Scott Benner 51:29
yeah. No kidding.

Jeff Flaxman 51:31
I find a way to get through it. I mean, that's that that hardened exterior, I guess, right? Just, I can pretty much take about anything you're gonna throw it.

Scott Benner 51:40
I usually tell people privately, like when the zombies come, you come find me because we're getting through it. You know, like, I'm not going down like that. And I have that sort of like, when things go wrong. I don't think like, I don't have a woe is me feeling ever. I'm always like, okay,

Unknown Speaker 51:59
that's gone.

Scott Benner 52:00
Yeah. How do I attack this? Where do I like where, you know, where's my in here? What can I make work? What am I gonna have to do to get this right for me again. And I know, that's not probably a completely healthy way to live. But I do think it came from how I grew up, I'm imagining you have it a similar,

Jeff Flaxman 52:18
it's that I think about survival mode is what I go into, I

Scott Benner 52:21
look at these are the things that absolutely have to do have to get done. And they will get done. And I'm able to kind of ignore the rest. Do you have any abandonment issues? Like do you feel like your family's about to be taken from you constantly?

Jeff Flaxman 52:33
No, I don't think so at all, I've been very blessed with the people that took me in when they did,

Scott Benner 52:38
yeah, so you have that coverage in your, in your mind, I just I I used to at the very beginning of my marriage, I was very over, aware that like, I never wanted there to be a problem. Because to me, it felt like a problem was gonna just start me down this road that I watched my family go down and didn't end up being the case, obviously, and I don't feel like that anymore. But in the beginning, I just didn't want anybody to fight ever. I was like, if someone fights, you know what's gonna happen, you're gonna move out, this is gonna happen, we're all gonna be broke, my kids are gonna end up raising each other, like you have that like that horrible feeling of like, you know, like, this is gonna repeat itself. I don't feel like that anymore. But I did when I was younger. So I wasn't sure I had that when I was younger. But now I

Jeff Flaxman 53:25
guess I can see through that. And when my wife and I do have an argument, I'm like, Look, this. This is not worth the time. We're spending on it right now. There is so much bigger things and I guess I'm able to move past it.

Scott Benner 53:37
I feel the same. I actually feel like I'm sure everyone does. But if I could just live a couple 100 years, I think I'd be really great. By the time I was like 170 like I really just

Jeff Flaxman 53:46
get figured out there. I

Scott Benner 53:48
really think I'm getting this figured out. Yeah, I just feel like I started in a whole you know, it took a while. Just a

Jeff Flaxman 53:55
few feet behind everyone else. Yeah. Well,

Scott Benner 53:58
that's pretty generous, but I yeah, okay. So when do you guys get married?

Jeff Flaxman 54:04
Oh, we get married in 2011. So that's she graduated college and Oh, wait, I graduated in oh nine because I took a victory lap there. I did. So well. The first four I needed one more year.

Scott Benner 54:19
I didn't leave enough of my money here with your people. Let me

Jeff Flaxman 54:23
Yeah, exactly. Hang on. We got married in 2011. And that's when I was actually able to start looking at diabetes and saying, you know this, it's not going anywhere. I've got the job thing figured out. I've got I'm engaged. I'm going to be married. I guess I should probably figure out this diabetes thing though.

Scott Benner 54:40
Okay. And so in

Jeff Flaxman 54:42
college I and this is going to be awful to anyone in college to hear but I probably tested my blood sugar maybe 6070 times throughout those five years, maybe because test strips were expensive and I knew I needed the insulin I could You'd probably make it without the test strips.

Scott Benner 55:03
Okay, so you just sort of eyeballed it. Like, based on the past, you're like, Oh, I should give myself about this much insulin here and my blood. Yes, probably it

Jeff Flaxman 55:11
was still on the 7030 mix for most of that time there. So

Unknown Speaker 55:16
I'm like, Well, I

Jeff Flaxman 55:17
think we go here it goes, they're on. There were a few more of the dangerous lows and highs a few times there, throughout all that, because that that 7030 mix at a time, it would be like stack on yourself so much of the long acting, and then it would all just dump at one time.

Scott Benner 55:32
How much of your diabetes was your girlfriend in college, like aware of?

Unknown Speaker 55:37
Ah, God,

Jeff Flaxman 55:38
even to this day? I haven't done a good job of teaching her What's going on? Like I was talking to her last night about this. She knew I had the this coming up. Yeah. Like you realize, I really don't know what you do with diabetes that much at all.

Scott Benner 55:52
It's interesting. Now I don't get so

Jeff Flaxman 55:53
programmed to self care.

Scott Benner 55:57
Yeah, I don't find it to be uncommon for many people that I talk to honestly, it's, it is it is either just one or the other. I've nobody's No one's ever said anything in the middle. They're always just like, Ah, it's on me. She doesn't really know he doesn't really know. Or it's or it's, oh, no, we're in this together. And it seems to be more wrapped around the timing of when the person was diagnosed. So what probably what care must have been like for them, then versus now when you can share it with somebody and, and think I'm just so used to dealing with it myself. I

Jeff Flaxman 56:28
just continue to like, I'll tell her how the doctor's appointments go. And when, hey, there's a low coming on here. The sensors telling me so I'm a you're in charge of the kids for the next 20 minutes while I battle? This monster here,

Scott Benner 56:40
huh? Yeah. And I mean, where would you even begin for to understand it, you know,

Jeff Flaxman 56:45
I have no idea. But I know how to do a better job. And that's kind of my goal.

Scott Benner 56:49
Okay. So so when you when you move into what we would call more like modern care? How long did it take you to figure it out?

Unknown Speaker 57:00
Well, I

Jeff Flaxman 57:00
started a pump in 2011, in probably eight years, seven, eight years. So 2018 about is when I really started buckling down and figuring things out here. So were you just sort of using the pump as a way to not have to inject.

Unknown Speaker 57:15
That's basically

Jeff Flaxman 57:16
what it was from about 2011 all the way until 2017 2018. It was I I had the education but at that time, I'm a hot shot like 25 year old I don't need to pay attention to what you're telling me. I've had this disease since I'm 12. What do you know? Yeah, Mr. Doctor guy.

Scott Benner 57:32
Yeah, that's um, another common

Jeff Flaxman 57:38
man, which was tremendous myself. I was stupid. Do that. No. But listen to the professionals. Yeah, I'm

Scott Benner 57:43
not saying no, I'm just saying it's a it's a pretty common feeling after you've been living with it for a while to just feel like, I don't want your help.

Jeff Flaxman 57:52
Yeah, but I was on the Medtronic pump system, and I still am today, which kind of makes me feel like a pariah being talked to by you and you Dexcom people there.

Scott Benner 58:02
You know, Jeff, it's funny. I hear people say sometimes, like, I'll see you online. Like I saw somebody that they say, Oh, you should try his podcast, especially if you have an omni pod and Dexcom. And I'm like, Is it really any different if you have a tandem and a Libra like it? It's not I don't have an allegiance to it. I know, people probably laugh to hear that. It's what my daughter uses. I know it to be really what you know, it's just what I know. And yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 58:25
and I, I don't really take any offense to it, your stuff is helpful. I mean, hearing a lot of that stuff that resonated with me, and I was able to implement a lot of the steps there myself.

Scott Benner 58:35
Thank you, Jeff. And I do have like, you know, I have in the past and I remain I I don't, I don't appreciate what I feel like I saw Medtronic doing around trying to close insurance coverage around just their pumps. And I thought that was pretty shaky, and I didn't like it. So I set it out loud. One time. You know what I mean? I

Unknown Speaker 58:58
I get it. Yeah.

Jeff Flaxman 59:01
I'm on that for so 2011. Yeah, sometime I eventually, like adapted and like 2013 2014 around there. I got there first. CGM, which I think was the enlight sensor is the one Medtronic had then but I didn't wear it. I didn't like it.

Scott Benner 59:21
Was the was the sensor wire? Like? I've heard people describe it as a harpoon was it is was it really bad?

Jeff Flaxman 59:28
I don't think so. No, I mean, I, I'm kind of weird. If my pain tolerance there were I wouldn't even use the inserter I would just kind of find the spot and just stab myself with it and

Scott Benner 59:37
just push it through with a hammer if you have to.

Jeff Flaxman 59:40
Yeah, like sometimes it hurt a little bit. But I was able to do it just got through. But what made it really difficult is I coached wrestling and my teaching job where I was at, okay, and I'm not sure if you're familiar with the sport at all, but wrestling with this thing hanging off your body there didn't play well together at all. So I tried By the sensor and then it would just get ripped out halfway through a practice.

Scott Benner 1:00:04
Yeah, I don't see how grappling. Does that make a big scene about it like,

Unknown Speaker 1:00:07
Oh my gosh, I'm dying.

Scott Benner 1:00:10
Yeah, I don't see how grappling and then that sensor would be would work together that well,

Jeff Flaxman 1:00:16
it didn't it didn't go well at all. But I would wear it maybe one week every two months because at that time the sensor only last. I think three or four days is all that one would last before you'd have to change it again.

Scott Benner 1:00:28
Hey, why do wrestlers ears get big and weird?

Jeff Flaxman 1:00:32
Ah, that's it's called cauliflower ear. So when they wrestle too much they don't wear protective covering over their ears in practice. And really the simplest term is the cartilage in the ear breaks and then re calcifies harder.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:45
Gotcha. So that's

Jeff Flaxman 1:00:46
what's happening the whole time. So it breaks re calcifies. And it breaks again, Re calcifies until it turns into this closed thing that is gross looking.

Scott Benner 1:00:55
Then my second wrestling question is how do I get ringworm from the mat? Why is that a thing? These are the all I know myself.

Jeff Flaxman 1:01:04
Because those mats are stored in usually a hot place. Like when they're rolled up. It's a environment with a little bit of sweat that's on it and the close quarters, it's able to live inside that, uh, I don't even know what the material is called, but it's able to live there.

Scott Benner 1:01:20
And then you get your face rubbed into it a couple of times. Yeah.

Jeff Flaxman 1:01:23
back of your head face. I mean, there's any number of things that could be gotcha. Oh,

Scott Benner 1:01:27
by the way, that's all I know about wrestling. That was the entirety of it right there.

Jeff Flaxman 1:01:32
Well, you know, you're not alone in that. That's those are all pretty common things. Yes. I asked

Scott Benner 1:01:36
the The only thing I could say from here is Jimmy Superfly, snuka. And then I'm kind of I'm kind of done with wrestling. And then you're out what I know. I do remember us all getting together to watch those like big wrestling pay per view events when I was we were kids. But I do also remember thinking I don't want to be doing this.

Jeff Flaxman 1:01:59
I don't know sports talk with me. It was good. I was I was good at it. And I just I enjoy that it teaches that independence. Maybe it matches myself there like you're the only one out there against another person. And as close as you can get to a fistfight. I can tell you, it's gonna come out some

Scott Benner 1:02:14
of the toughest people I know wrestle. So it's not it's it's brutal. It's killer. Yeah, it's not it's not surprising to me that you did it, actually.

Jeff Flaxman 1:02:23
But I coached that for a while. But then my second child was born and I couldn't manage the schedule to coach and do that. So in 2018 that was when I'm like, I'm not doing this anymore. I don't have an excuse to not wear the sensor. It's time I do this. Right.

Scott Benner 1:02:39
And one of the things I'm sorry to say I'm sorry, how old

Jeff Flaxman 1:02:44
I'm 32 years old by then like, you know, I've had this for 20 years. Let's Let's kick this in the tail. Gotcha.

Scott Benner 1:02:49
And what happened after you made the decision to pay more attention and and do this in a more so I started

Jeff Flaxman 1:02:56
like that seeing that sensor data was so eye opening at that time was like, holy cow. This is what's been going on between my testing times like I ate breakfast the normal breakfast there, and I'm feeling fine. I tested for lunch numbers are good, but I didn't realize that. Like I just had some beeps going off here on mine that my breakfast shot up a little faster than avoided because of the coffee and come down. I didn't know the roller coaster I was on.

Scott Benner 1:03:22
Yeah. What's the first step when you realize what's happening?

Unknown Speaker 1:03:27
Ah,

Jeff Flaxman 1:03:28
and first it's that frustration like what the heck did I do wrong? Like what where did I mess up? I followed this and then it I mean, you know it you hear it all the time it comes down to change the basil rates there, push them up here, slow them down there, carve a little extra there. And I think my whole life I grew up with that fear of insulin scary. That I mean, that stuff can kill you. So I was always hesitant to give myself too much.

Scott Benner 1:03:54
Yeah, why we said it earlier. Right. Don't get low. Don't pass out don't get dizzy. Yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 1:03:57
I mean, that was my fear. Like low is terrifying. High is gonna kill me in the long run. But lows, those are terrifying. I don't want those.

Scott Benner 1:04:04
What's that sentence mean to you? Like, it's gonna kill me in the long run? Did you ever think it meant you know, when you were 40? Or did you just think it meant is just something you didn't? I don't

Jeff Flaxman 1:04:14
think I never placed a timestamp on it. I want it to be but I knew by probably Gosh, by my late 20s, early 30s I knew the higher my blood sugar was the longer the more long term damage. I was opening myself up.

Scott Benner 1:04:28
Yeah, I just think that cognitively people don't Delve too deeply into what that means when they make the trade from that when they feel like they're trading now for later. Yeah, you know, it's some people's later will be you know, I don't know I'll die when I'm 72 instead of when I'm 75 but not not, you know, people don't think of it as you know. I'm gonna need laser surgery in my eyes when I'm 30 like, yeah, that's not that's not how your brain wraps around it. I guess. It's self present still, like my eyes.

Jeff Flaxman 1:04:58
I'm still further The heck I put myself through there in high school and college, barely testing. Who knows what those numbers were. I mean, I didn't have an A one c check from the time I was 16 until I was like 22. It just didn't happen because it wasn't in the cards. I didn't have insurance. I couldn't really go to a doctor, I was able to my family doctor would renew prescriptions without seeing me because I knew I couldn't afford.

Scott Benner 1:05:21
Yeah, they were trying to help you quote unquote,

Jeff Flaxman 1:05:24
yes, yeah. And it was it kept me alive. Sure.

Scott Benner 1:05:27
No, hey, listen. I mean, I, I always think of that. That movie where the climber gets his arm pinned under the Boulder, and after a couple of days, cuts it off with a pen knife. And I think of like, the enemy. Like, yeah, you just make the best decision in that moment. You can to just live for one more second, you know, like, you're just like, and that's how I think of sometimes how I think of a lot of your stories of diabetes. And back in the day of people just like trying to get through today, this hour this day. Yeah, I'm gonna

Jeff Flaxman 1:05:57
I'm gonna tackle today and tomorrow. I'll worry about tomorrow.

Scott Benner 1:05:59
Yeah, yeah, it's a it's a, a real luxury of the technology that we can all sit around now and look at this data and think about, you know, look at it at a more micro level and then start to consider macro out over the years based on you know, I can I can keep this a one c like this forever. If I want to now, like I know how to do Yeah, yeah, it's a it's a luxury for certain.

Jeff Flaxman 1:06:23
I mean, by 2018, two kids, I'm managing things a lot better. The lows are really ever happening, the highs, before I could see a 240 and say, 220, I'll deal with it. But now, once it gets above 150 on the sensor, I'm like, What are you doing? Stop it. And then I started attacking and correcting. That's excellent.

Scott Benner 1:06:43
I'm happy for you. What are your What are your agencies like now? I'm

Jeff Flaxman 1:06:48
low 70s for a while. And then probably a year ago, now I jumped to the 670 G, and I've been on their auto or auto mode. They're the semi closed loop system since then, that bring you down more? We'd like to say that.

Scott Benner 1:07:04
Can we say that with any Honestly?

Jeff Flaxman 1:07:07
I can't it has at this point. There is that frustration? I'm sure you're well aware of it, the whole FDA or whoever it is that doesn't let them set a lower target in there. Like when I go through it, and I noticed my blood sugar's at 140, which isn't bad. But I see the arrows up, I know what's coming. And I try to get myself a Bolus in that mode to autocorrect. And it's like, No, no, you're not above 150 you can't pull us right now. We'll take care of it in the algorithm there.

Scott Benner 1:07:36
Do you have to get out of the loop somehow to do that, then,

Jeff Flaxman 1:07:39
I mean, I could exit the loop and then go back into it to fix it there. I mean, that's the correct way to do it. But most of the time, I will go to Bolus which I know is a no no. And I should slap myself on the wrist for that. Well yeah, like I'm gonna take care of it myself because you're not doing it fast enough.

Scott Benner 1:07:57
Right. I think you're just adapting the I mean, you said it to the FDA set limits on on where they could have targets and you know, I think the one you're using is basically the first one out the door so there's

Jeff Flaxman 1:08:08
Yeah, it's only gonna get better for all their companies from here and I'll for sure

Scott Benner 1:08:13
yeah, good for you know, I think do what you need to do. I would I have thought you're gonna say you injected a little insight i didn't know i i don't know why just pretending carbs went in didn't occur to me. I just think after talking to you for an hour I was like he probably just stick some insulin in his leg real quick with the knee.

Jeff Flaxman 1:08:30
Oh, I I have a box of needles here but I haven't touched a needle system in a long time. Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:08:37
we have the same needles from ardens diagnosis still like we use probably three a year maybe you don't I mean

Jeff Flaxman 1:08:44
that's just so foreign to me. Yes. He was diagnosed so young and

Scott Benner 1:08:49
pump that whole time I mean good for her. Yeah, it's very cool. It really is. It just it makes me happy to think that she and just all the other people who are coming online you know today in the in the recent past have access and at least the hope you know, I know everybody can't afford it and some people don't have insurance obviously that that's helpful and that is sickening. But just that that exists and that people are talking about it differently. I just interviewed an 18 year old girl yesterday who was struggling and she said she came in one day and her endo just said look i don't i I'm not getting through to you. I think you should listen to this podcast. And and hurry one season the is is is incredible. Now it went down like two points. But the point is is that like that the doctor didn't just for the rest of her life. Just let her agency sit in the eights and go I don't know like you and I don't jive together so I guess this is your life. The doctor for that

Jeff Flaxman 1:09:47
doctor that was good for her to have that doctor.

Scott Benner 1:09:49
I thought so too. Yeah, we're just really interesting. The way it goes. All right, Jeff, listen. Did we miss anything? Did your Did you have five cats run away? You know, I

Unknown Speaker 1:10:01
mean?

Jeff Flaxman 1:10:03
I think that's the ups and downs. There's probably some more in there. But then the diabetes, we don't need to go deep into the rabbit hole here. Yeah, no,

Scott Benner 1:10:11
no, I didn't. It's tough. At one point about halfway through I, I heard your voice break. And I was like, Oh, I

Jeff Flaxman 1:10:16
was breaking up a little bit there. But I,

Scott Benner 1:10:19
I got through it too for you. It's is it cathartic to talk about? Or just is it not something you think about much anymore?

Jeff Flaxman 1:10:27
I don't think about it. And I usually call it my fatal flaw there. But I like to keep emotions buried down deep where they belong. Gotcha. Jeff,

Unknown Speaker 1:10:35
Catholic Jeff, by any chance?

Jeff Flaxman 1:10:37
No, my wife is. So I've got a little scene next to my okay.

Unknown Speaker 1:10:41
She could teach you how to

Jeff Flaxman 1:10:44
teach me and I go through the motions and nod my head I understand.

Scott Benner 1:10:49
That's really accent and you said, you mentioned your two younger kids. The no signs of diabetes. Where do you stand on looking? Do you do trialnet? Or do you just wait and see? Ah, no, I'm

Jeff Flaxman 1:11:01
waiting for the symptoms. Yeah, I like the covers there. I haven't bothered look through the whole DNA genome there to see if it's in there. Because if it is, it's going to hit them anyways. And if it's not, I think I'm Cognizant enough to be aware of when it's happening.

Scott Benner 1:11:15
I think that is a valid stance on this. I think they're, I think everyone's stance on that is valid, but I don't have a way to argue with either the people who are like, I'm just gonna let life unfold and I'll take care of it as I can. Yeah, and if my

Jeff Flaxman 1:11:28
daughter and son they never have to deal with that they can eat all the Reese's Peanut Butter Cups they want good for them.

Scott Benner 1:11:33
Would that be your go to if you didn't have diabetes all the time? Would it be the Almond Joy?

Jeff Flaxman 1:11:37
That coconut is amazing.

Scott Benner 1:11:40
Almond Joy has nuts mounds don't Is that right? I think that's the message you're not old enough to remember those. Those commercials.

Jeff Flaxman 1:11:48
I've got a vague memory of those commercials, but not much.

Scott Benner 1:11:51
I think all the Charlie Brown specials used to be the advertiser was I think mounds and Almond Joy. And you have no idea like like What a crazy like, you know, even you were too young for that. But the idea that like once a year, you know, the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown would come on like the day before that before Halloween. And

Jeff Flaxman 1:12:12
I remember little that as a kid, but it was more for a nostalgia. It wasn't like a huge viewing event that

Scott Benner 1:12:17
oh my god, no matter where you were, like the entire world just ran home to watch Charlie Brown. It was you know, you it was gonna happen and then it was going to be going again. And you couldn't you couldn't find it or rewatch I remember when it came out on DVD, or VHS. Maybe VHS, VHS. And the idea that I could just watch the Great Pumpkin Charlie Brown at my leisure was mind numbing,

Jeff Flaxman 1:12:41
though Yeah, that's, I see it with kids now to like in this world of Netflix and Hulu and Disney plus, like, my children don't know what a commercial is on TV. Yeah. If they can't go from one Mickey Mouse Club house directly into the second one, they think something's wrong in the world, something's happened. Well, you

Scott Benner 1:12:57
know what the funny thing is that once I had access to it on VHS, I never watched it. And it stopped becoming appointment television at Halloween, because the feeling was there that I could just watch it whenever I want. And so actually having more access to it stopped me from ever watching it again.

Jeff Flaxman 1:13:16
Well, isn't that a strange phenomenon? It really is.

Scott Benner 1:13:18
I think I think that happens to I think the access that you ever do that you ever decide you're going to watch something and spend a half an hour scrolling and then never watch anything. Oh, yeah, that

Jeff Flaxman 1:13:31
happens quite a bit. Like, Ah, man, I need to watch something here. Let's see what's on and then you just, you go into that. It's like getting on a deep Google on something where you're 12 Wikipedia pages in and then you find nothing. By the end of it. You're like, Well, okay, it's

Scott Benner 1:13:43
bedtime. Now I tried. So my point is, which is better?

Unknown Speaker 1:13:46
Now, I have no idea

Jeff Flaxman 1:13:48
why we're not gonna fix that. We're better so because you watched it. It was on you knew it was there. And that was it. I'll

Scott Benner 1:13:53
tell you what, those commercials work. I've never had a mouse or an almond joy in my life. But I could sing that damn song If I had to. So

Jeff Flaxman 1:13:59
yeah, those those advertisers know what they're doing.

Scott Benner 1:14:02
They certainly do. Jeff, I can't thank you enough for opening this wound and sharing it with everybody your

Jeff Flaxman 1:14:09
email, able to help some other parents out there or even people that have it that I mean, life can throw a lot at you. But it's I don't know, I say that it's not an excuse to give up.

Scott Benner 1:14:21
Is that like, I never do this on this podcast ever. But if I said to you, like, leave people with a message is what is the message? Like, how did you get through all this?

Jeff Flaxman 1:14:34
I, I just saw it as there was no other choice. I mean, I had to get through it. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:14:41
All right. So nothing we can pass on to people. I think, by the way, too. It's a fallacy. The idea that Jeff knows something that if you just knew your life or your kid's life would go better. I think that your reaction to all these things that happen is, is classically who you are and you know it worked out for you because That's your personality. And maybe that's a little dumb luck even, you know,

Jeff Flaxman 1:15:03
I think there's a heavy amount of dumb luck in my life, I've kind of always tend to fall forward on things. I mean, sometimes yes, sometimes No, but I've always found the best in that situation.

Scott Benner 1:15:13
Yeah, I might have to name this episode falling forward. Because there's, I don't know what else I would call it to be perfectly honest. I really appreciate you doing this. I genuinely do.

Unknown Speaker 1:15:25
Oh, no, I enjoyed

Jeff Flaxman 1:15:26
it. I mean, it's a little rough at times there. But I again, I hope that I'm able to help. Even in teaching, I see it as like, I noticed a kid with diabetes come into class, I instantly try to connect with them and say, Hey, what's your numbers out there?

Scott Benner 1:15:39
Yeah, he used your full name when you introduced yourself, if not that, I don't know how they would. But if one of your students ended up hearing this, you're fine with that. Right?

Jeff Flaxman 1:15:50
Yeah, that's fine. If they hear it, they hear it. Yeah. How much? I don't think there's anything incriminating. I

Scott Benner 1:15:56
mean, we'll find out how I didn't mean that. I meant it's personal. But I meant, like, how much of yourself? Do you share with your students? Is that not how that works?

Jeff Flaxman 1:16:04
Um, well, when I was an English teacher, I taught some novels we would read in there and there was death or something like family tragedy, I would connect with him there on that moment to get it across and open up to them a little bit.

Scott Benner 1:16:15
I say, I say that's a, it's a listen, I have to ask you before we go, I think, where do you stand on? I mean, we're recording this in August 2020. Yeah. Where do you stand on going back and being in a classroom for kids? As far as team like, what's your thought?

Jeff Flaxman 1:16:36
Well, I in my school, I teach it, I'm on the committee's to figure out how to do that. And we've all come to the agreement that it's a lose lose situation, whatever choice a school makes, someone's going to end up losing their correct choice right now.

Scott Benner 1:16:52
Can we please everyone? Can kids be taught effectively over video?

Jeff Flaxman 1:16:58
Yeah, older kids, definitely, I have my concerns on how an elementary first, second, third grade will do it. And it's not so much the kids can't learn. My concern is I don't know how many teachers have the skill set to make a successful video to interact with him that way and have that technology knowledge behind them to manage all of it is

Scott Benner 1:17:20
is are you finding that some teachers just don't have the desire to be, like, put on video like this is they find it embarrassing? Oh,

Jeff Flaxman 1:17:28
definitely some that like, I'm not recording myself, they're not comfortable doing that. I mean, I teach. Now I teach like a stem in technology class, and I have no issues making videos and YouTubes. And I do some video editing in the background and making things so I don't have a problem with it. But I know there are some that either don't have the skill set, or just not comfortable putting their face on YouTube for a lesson. Because at some point, those kids are going to edit that video down and make them look ridiculous. And I hope it's hilarious what they do to me, I can't wait to see it.

Scott Benner 1:17:58
That's the right attitude. I'll tell you, I was talking to somebody the other day about the internet. And I said, The funny thing about the internet is if you don't pay attention to it, it doesn't exist. It's just yeah, it's not really there a way to look at it. It just it you don't know there could be, you know, right now, countless people in the world who just hate my guts. And if they never tell me and I don't go looking for it doesn't matter to me. And yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 1:18:24
that you don't see it or hear it. It's not real.

Scott Benner 1:18:26
But I don't know what other way to say if it's not impacting me, it doesn't exist. And so, you know, I don't that concern about what other people think you mentioned in the beginning, like, I don't care what people think. I have that very same feeling. I'm very structured in the idea that if I say something here that's valuable to some people, and some people hate me. I'm just happy that it's valuable to somebody. And yeah,

Jeff Flaxman 1:18:51
because if they don't like it or hate it, then they're not gonna use it anyways. So Fine, let's move on just sort of meaningless. I

Scott Benner 1:18:57
can't help everybody. Anyway, I now I want to see the videos that the kids making you too. So

Jeff Flaxman 1:19:04
if you search my name on YouTube, my channels there you can see some of the ridiculous stuff I put out last spring form. It's there. No kidding.

Scott Benner 1:19:11
All right. Well, good luck with all this man. I really, I hope it works out. You know, as best as it possibly can. And that, you know, everything gets back to normal, hopefully, you know, as soon as possible. Gosh,

Jeff Flaxman 1:19:22
I hope at some point we're able to function in a society that resembled something of 2019 Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:19:27
I mean, I just don't. I mean, I think obviously a vaccine is going to be the thing that makes people more comfortable because I saw those pictures from Georgia The other day, they went back to school.

Jeff Flaxman 1:19:36
Yeah, that Oh, that terrifies me.

Scott Benner 1:19:38
I mean, high school we've elected we're starting remote. There will be no in person instruction. At this time. My daughter chose to stay home even though she could have chose to go on it. there's part of me that thinks that they're all gonna go back. One kid's gonna get sick. Teachers gonna get sick. custodians, give me a sec. They're gonna panic and send everybody home anyway.

Jeff Flaxman 1:19:55
And yeah, that's exactly what would have happened and that's why our district just said it's not worth it. I mean, While you're planning, you'd have been sending your daughter into a minimum security prison.

Scott Benner 1:20:05
My son's college basically came out and said that once we saw all the precautions we had to put into place, it would have been financially a burden for us. And just ridiculous. They were talking about tenting urinals in public restrooms, like putting 10

Jeff Flaxman 1:20:19
Yeah, I mean, there was that we had rotating bathroom schedules and when you were allowed to go and when you weren't, yeah, it just the diabetic kids would have to pee every 20 minutes would have been up poops Creek, they wouldn't have chance.

Unknown Speaker 1:20:30
Little Jeff, what would he have done?

Unknown Speaker 1:20:32
I don't know. It'd been rough. Oh,

Scott Benner 1:20:35
my God, Jeff, this was really terrific. Thank you. I'm gonna let you go. But I really appreciate it.

Unknown Speaker 1:20:39
No problem. You

Scott Benner 1:20:39
have a good rest of your day take care of you as well. A huge thank you to one of today's sponsors. Gvoke glucagon. Find out more about chivo Kibo pen at G Vogue glucagon.com forward slash juicebox you spell that GVOKEGLUcagon.com/juicebox. I'd also like to thank the Contour Next One blood glucose meter and remind you to go to ContourNextone.com/juicebox. And of course touched by type one is at touchedbytype1.org on Facebook, and Instagram. February 2021 is shaping up to be the most successful month of this podcast and I can't thank you enough for sharing the show with others, whether that be a link, or by word of mouth. The show is growing because you are sharing it. Don't forget to subscribe and your podcast app if you haven't. And please accept my heartfelt thanks for being a listener. And we'll be back soon with another episode that you're going to love.

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