#1094 Golden Seven Pole

December 27, 2023Scott Benner

Kim is a type 1 who was born with a congenital heart defect.

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DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.

Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, and welcome to episode 1094 of the Juicebox Podcast.

I'll be speaking with Kim today she's 42 years old, a type one and a school teacher. Kim has got a number of things going on here. She's had gastric bypass surgery, which we speak about. Her family has a deep and rich history with autoimmune issues. And she's had three heart surgeries in total. There's more than that even so, I'm not even scratching the surface on who Kim is. Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan, or becoming bold with insulin. As the end of the year approaches quickly, I just want to take this moment to thank all of you for subscribing and following and supporting the Juicebox Podcast. It means the world to me. And I will absolutely be back for a 10th year of the podcast in 2024 because of the kind support that you all and if you're looking for community around type one diabetes, check out the Juicebox Podcast private Facebook group Juicebox Podcast type one diabetes, but everybody is welcome. Type one type two gestational loved ones. It doesn't matter to me. If you're impacted by diabetes, and you're looking for support, comfort or community check out Juicebox Podcast type one diabetes on Facebook. Today's episode of The Juicebox Podcast is sponsored by the contour next gen blood glucose meter. This is the meter that my daughter has on her person right now. It is incredibly accurate and waiting for you at contour next one.com/juice box. A huge thanks to a longtime sponsor touched by type one, please check them out on Facebook, Instagram, and at touched by type one.org. If you're looking to support an organization that's supporting people with type one diabetes, check out touched by type one.

Kim 2:12
Hi, my name is Kim. I'm a diabetic.

Scott Benner 2:16
Nice, perfect. How old are you?

Kim 2:21
I am almost 4242 in a couple of weeks.

Scott Benner 2:23
Oh, I'm awful. I'm I'm 52 and a couple of weeks.

Kim 2:28
Ah, are you a July birthday? I am. As am I? Were you born on the golden day of July 7. Is

Scott Benner 2:37
that the day you were born? That's yeah, of course that would meet at the Golden day.

Kim 2:42
Yeah, well, yeah. I mean, I, seventh child born on the seventh day of the seventh month. I mean, you can't get better than that. Except my sister had two babies on my birthday. Three years apart. And one of them was born. Oh 70707 sheets. So she went UPS me. It

Scott Benner 3:00
feels like what you're explained to me is that this thing that you thought was very important turns out to be very common.

Kim 3:05
Whoa, whoa, easy there. No, I have lured many people into magically having babies on my birthday with my magnetic pole of awesomeness and like you should also partake in the awesomeness of a July 7 birthday. Kim

Scott Benner 3:21
I don't think you should talk about childbirth and then say you have a magnetic hole or what is your

Kim 3:29
WHY DID YOU have to make it weird? Why did you have to make it weird?

Scott Benner 3:32
I didn't say

Kim 3:35
I just You have skewed everything.

Scott Benner 3:37
All I did was listen to what you say and repeat it back to you

Kim 3:43
in the weirdest way possible. I

Scott Benner 3:44
mean, you said it. Alright, so you're 42 ish. How old were you and you were diagnosed. Now you had a you had a misdiagnosis. Is that right?

Kim 3:53
I did. Yeah. So I was diagnosed as a type two diabetic in December of 2019. Okay, and when I'm with my agency was 14.8 when I went in, and I went in because I thought my sister had so I was 37 then 38 was 38 when I was diagnosed and my sister my just older than me at 38 started losing weight she was all shaky, turns out she had Graves disease so i My hair is falling out and I've lost 30 pounds without trying which is surprising because I had a gastric bypass at 15 like weight has never been an easy thing for me and and I go in to get my thyroid tested because I'm like I probably have Graves disease as well. And my thyroid was completely normal and my my blood sugar my fasting blood sugar the nurse said to me, did you eat a doughnut before you came in? She was like calling to give me test results. So when I was like, or she said, Were you fasting? And I said, Yeah. And she said, You didn't like eat a doughnut on the way. And I was like, No, I'm not dumb. You know, like, I was like, deeply offended that she would suggest and she's like, because your glucose was a little elevated. And I'm like, well, like, how high? She's like 375. And I'm like, Okay, well, I don't even I know nothing. And so I Google it and everything says like, seek medical, immediate medical attention. I'm like, Great, I'm gonna die immediately. And of course, when she called me to tell me this, I was eating homemade caramels. Like just popping up one after another. So

Scott Benner 5:37
are you in the Midwest?

Kim 5:39
I am in Oregon. Actually. I won't tell you where so no one can come and kill me. Yes.

Scott Benner 5:44
Oh, you're the second person who said that in two weeks when I've been recording and they said I made an announcement. I said nobody go kill Dana. Yes, I just listened to them. Oh, that's why you said it. Okay. It was like yeah, don't come to me. Don't please leave.

Kim 6:01
I also will not go look for Dana. She seems like a very nice person.

Scott Benner 6:06
Okay, so wait a minute, I heard a lot I need to pick through it. You to gastric bypass when you were 15 years old.

Kim 6:12
I did. I was born with a congenital heart defect that they diagnosed at two months old. And then just was fat. I was just really fat. For me. I weighed I'm five fives. Okay. I like to say five, eight. I'm really like five, seven and a quarter. Let's be honest. Um, at the time that I had gastric bypass, I weighed 270 pounds. I had done Weight Watchers. Well, not Weight Watchers. I've done nutrious I've done every thing imaginable. I took I took Fen fan when I was 12. I mean, like, all the things right? And nothing really worked. And I needed. I needed heart surgery because my blood pressure was really high. And so this was it's the only thing in my life I've ever been underweight for my, my BMI was slightly lower than they wanted it to be. But they made an exception. And so when I was 15, which was the absolute youngest you could be to have gastric bypass. I had a gastric bypass done. And it's it wasn't laparoscopic at the time was in 1996. And so I have a scar from my sternum to my belly button.

Scott Benner 7:22
Did it work?

Kim 7:24
Yeah, it really did. It was when I say it worked. I mean, that it gave me the ability to fight weight in a more normal way, instead of 100 pounds at a time. You know, it's 30 pounds at a time. Like what I assume everybody else how everyone else is, is fighting weight. But I lost 100 pounds in about nine months. My hair fell out a lot. I was certainly malnourished in a lot of ways just because you know, you can eat so so little at first, it's like, I would eat like two bites. And I'd be like, I'm done. I can't you have to sip you can't. My stomach was two ounces. And so but yeah, I mean I really the highest the the lowest they weighed right after surgery was about 167 Contour

Scott Benner 8:17
next one.com/juicebox. That's the link you'll use. To find out more about the contour next gen blood glucose meter. When you get there, there's a little bit at the top, you can click right on blood glucose monitoring, I'll do it with you go to meters, click on any of the meters. I'll click on the Next Gen and you're going to get more information. It's easy to use and highly accurate. smartlight provides a simple understanding of your blood glucose levels. And of course, with Second Chance sampling technology, you can save money with fewer wasted test strips. As if all that wasn't enough, the contour next gen also has a compatible app for an easy way to share and see your blood glucose results. Contour next one.com/juicebox And if you scroll down at that link, you're gonna see things like a Buy Now button. You could register your meter after you purchase it or what is this download a coupon? Oh, receive a free contour next gen blood glucose meter, do tell contour next.com/juicebox head over there now get the same accurate and reliable meter that we use.

Kim 9:25
And then the highest Coast surgery I fluctuated between like 170 and 200 or, I don't know 20 years 15 years. And then I started counting calories probably six or seven years ago and pretty regularly I'm and I found running I started running and that those two things together just kind of led to a life where I was sitting in the below 160s For a long time and then when I was diagnosed it was like kind of all of a sudden that my, I gained a little bit of weight. So in August, I went to the cardiologist and I weighed like 185 in the afternoon and, and when I went to the doctor in December, I weighed 152. So I'd lost 35 pounds without trying. I mean, just, you know, eating everything in the world and always hungry, always tired blood sugar through the roof. And then, because I was misdiagnosed for a couple of years, I controlled I tried to control everything simply with my diet, and I stopped eating everything I liked. I might have carb ofour if it's not a carb, I really don't want to eat it. So I wasn't eating very much at all because I'd cut everything that brought me happiness out of my life. I mean, food wise, my family, my kids, my husband, I love them my job.

Scott Benner 10:57
I didn't misunderstand that part time work. Everything I got everything I love out of my life food, basically, Scott, no, but everyone in your family struggle with weight. Are you like an anomaly?

Kim 11:10
I would say no. It's it's something that every single person in my family like we just have crap genetics. I always joke. I'm the youngest of seven kids. I always joke that I'm the genetic trash leftover after the other six kids because I've got, you know, a heart condition diabetes, like I just, my body's just crap. And like, Thanks, Mom and Dad. Thanks for that. It's good to have you. It's

Scott Benner 11:33
what was left that they had to work. Yes.

Kim 11:36
Have you seen the the movie twins with Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito? Of course, from the 90s. Yeah. And he's like, I'm the genetic crap left after him. I'm like, that's totally. I'm the genetic crap leftover. After all, all the others did.

Scott Benner 11:53
Your heart. I just have to ask I don't think the timeline lines up the way you explained it. But is the fen Fen have anything to do with the heart issue? Nope, no. Okay.

Kim 12:02
No, and I didn't I really didn't have any adverse effect. I lost like 30 pounds until I stopped taking it. And then I gained 30 pounds back.

Scott Benner 12:10
What did it do for you to remember?

Kim 12:12
I simply did not feel hungry. Okay, like at all ever? At all, like it was a struggle. I was counting calories just to make sure I got enough food in my body.

Scott Benner 12:26
Yeah. Are you pissed that now that GLP ones exist and you had to get cut open to have that feeling?

Kim 12:31
You know what? I am not it. It I can't imagine I think about it now like the choices the medical choices my parents had to make. The year I had gastric bypass. I had an appendectomy in February. I had an angioplasty in April, and I had gastric bypass in July. I mean, it was just like this crazy medical year for me, but it changed my life. Like, I can't imagine all of the heartache. And I'm sure prayer and, and all of the things that went into it for them to make that choice for me. I was on board because nothing worked. I mean, I just, it tried hard at a lot of things. And it was the only thing that worked. And then for a lot of years, I struggled with a lot of guilt feeling like, oh, I took the easy way out. Until, like, 15 years ago, I was watching an episode of The Biggest Loser at which I love and a girl on The Biggest Loser was about my same age. And she'd had gastric bypass about my same time. And she weighed 300 pounds again, and I was sitting at like 180. And I was like, Okay, what they told me when I had gastric bypass is that it 80% of the people keep 80% of the weight off. And I sit very firmly in that category. So it changed my life. I would I would do it again, even though I had a lot of complications since then, because of it. So even with the complications, you

Scott Benner 14:04
always still do it right. Yeah. Yeah. So I have a maybe an odd question. You have kids, right? You said? I do. Yep. So I always think that one day Kim Kardashian children are going to grow up and go hey, where's my big round us? And how come my lips aren't full? Why don't I like this? Do you worry that like cuz you're thinner. Now. What is your what if your kids follow in your footsteps? Like what are you going to do for them? So

Kim 14:34
it is it's it's something that has already happened? You know, we have both my kids have struggled one way or another. My daughter in particular. It's a powerful thing to say to a kid. Look, I know exactly how you feel. Like I My daughter has lost 60 pounds in the last year. She's done amazing things. I'm super proud of her to you know taking some healthier steps. But, but at the the hardest points I'm like, Yeah, I know what this is like, I know how it feels to be 15 And have you know your life and be like this. So I think in a lot of respects it is. Just because I it's not like I'm like, oh yes, I'm so hot now. You know, it's not anything like that. Like, it's like, Dude, I and they see that I still work every day I exercise regularly. I'm careful about what I eat. I like it. They we just talked about the crappy genetics that I have now. The trash I have passed to them. You're welcome children.

Scott Benner 15:35
Yeah. How old is she? You know? She's,

Kim 15:39
she'll be 16 this summer will

Scott Benner 15:41
be 16. Okay. So now I'm putting myself in the position of the people listening. And I'm gonna I'm gonna ask like, I mean, if they're going to like some people are gonna think you must be eating like Fritos with one hand and drinking Coke with another and snorting sugar. But is, is that's not the case. Right? No,

Kim 16:01
it's I think, and for each person, it's different. What I can say about myself, I won't speak to my daughter because you know, I am really open, she is less open. So I'll speak to myself. For me. I was a frequent eater. I was always super active. We had a trampoline. I rode my bike all over town, like the activity part of it. I wasn't super sedentary. I simply was just hungry a lot. So I and it wasn't like I was eating trash all the time. I just ate frequently. A I was a Grazer and a male eater.

Scott Benner 16:37
This is this is what I wanted to dig into deep Did you if if any of this sounds familiar, tell me. You open your eyes in the morning and wonder immediately what you're going to eat?

Kim 16:47
Yes, but that is still how I live my life simply because I love

Scott Benner 16:52
food. Oh, that's okay. Well, but so then you decide what you're gonna have for breakfast. You're already thinking about lunch.

Kim 16:58
You know, it's been a lot of years now. Since I've, but I mean, yeah, I live a very even now, I mean, obviously differently because of diabetes, that it's a food centric life. But yeah, yeah. And I'm a good cook, and a good baker. And so yeah, I'm always thinking like, what is the next delicious thing we're going to eat? Yeah.

Scott Benner 17:19
Didn't didn't ever feel full? You know, I

Kim 17:22
think about that. It's not that I didn't feel full. And it's, it's true, even today is that I don't stay full for a long time. Like I could, my husband will eat a big meal. And he'll be like, I'm not eating for four more days, you know? Like he's like, so he stays full or ever. And me. I'm like, Oh my gosh, I'm, like so full that I think I'm gonna die. And like an hour and a half later. I'm like, Kitty, you know, like, let's do this.

Scott Benner 17:51
If somebody said, are you hungry? would you respond? I'm always hungry. I usually say I could eat, I could eat. Okay. So the reason I bring it up is because I'm now I have to dig through my box of empty weego V pens here. But I'm now I'm now just about three months into using Lego. So I just How are you liking it? Well, I like being thinner. I can tell you that. Sure. Yeah, I just injected my one milligram my last one milligram dose. So I move up next week on Tuesday. So I'm pretty much a week shy of three months. And I am 20 pounds lighter, maybe a little more. I look different. Like I'm starting to look at myself and think like, oh, this is what I thought I looked like.

Kim 18:40
It's just like the same thing as what you think you sound like, are you photoshopping yourself in your brain?

Scott Benner 18:45
I might have been because I used to tell myself like, Oh, I just need to lose 20 pounds and I lost 20 pounds. I was like, Oh, I must have been wrong about that. Because I didn't lose 20 pounds ago all done. I lost 20 pounds. And I went oh, yeah, totally. Yeah, I didn't realize that part about the weight. I do want to say in fairness to me, and to give a pretty accurate picture. I am one of those people you would categorize as carrying weight really well. Like you wish you would not have looked at me and said, I mean, I'll just say because I've said it on the podcast already. But like, when I started we go via I weighed 233. Okay, and your weight How tall are you? five, nine. But you wouldn't, you would have been hard pressed to peg me for more than about 180 pounds. Okay, it's just weird how I don't know how it's masked is and why after losing 20 pounds I looked and I was like, Well, okay, I mean, that's a good start. But the point is, is this this GLP one like, you know, which would be we go V Manjaro. I think that's right. Yeah. It was epic. Like these drugs, right? These new injectable ones. I physically can't eat very much food. Yeah. And then it's interesting because the closer to the injection day, that guy I'll inject today I'll have I won't be able to eat a whole lot today. Tomorrow, the next day three, four days, it'll be pretty much like that as it tails off the fifth sixth day. I can eat a little more, like like I could, but I'm not hungry. I so what I mean by that is I don't feel as full as quickly but I'm just at this point now where I'm just not hungry. Right, you know, and I didn't have all the drawl to food that you've described or other people have described my wife, my wife, my wife will come on here one day and talk about like the voice in our head that's like eat you know, and by the way, she she also has a thyroid issue, do you?

Kim 20:44
I do not, but it is like my family is

Scott Benner 20:50
autoimmune central auto immune. Yes. Yeah. Like,

Kim 20:53
I've got a couple brothers with ankylosing spondylitis. I've got my dad has psoriasis. type two. Well, type two is not auto immune. But like type two is running rampant, which is why I originally was misdiagnosed thyroid issues. My mom and my grandma, my aunt are hypo, hypo thyroid. My sisters hyperthyroid. I mean, like, we're just a mess.

Scott Benner 21:17
Isn't it interesting, too, I thought right away when you said it, that you and your sister are similarly aged, and around the same time developed an autoimmune disease, which that crazy I felt like there was a countdown timer on both of you. It seems

Kim 21:34
it feels that way. I wonder the thing that, like I have lots of of questions about you know, how my like, what triggered my diabetes, if you will? Or, or how long I had high blood sugars and didn't know it. Because I just think, you know, like, was it slowly creeping up like the it keeps me awake at night sometimes to think like how much damage they do to my body simply because I was unaware. And I mean, I ran a full marathon undiagnosed. Like, a month before I was diagnosed, I ran a full marathon. Well,

Scott Benner 22:13
let's This is not scientific. But after you were done after you were diagnosed and went on insulin, did you gain a bunch of weight? So

Kim 22:20
I haven't gained weight. I didn't gain weight. So i Okay. i They put me on Metformin immediately. And then I stopped eating like any carbs. And still my blood sugar was about 250 regularly. And then they put me on Ash, I can't think of the name of it. It costs me I learned a lot about advocating for myself medically, when I went to the pharmacy and paid $1,000 for a drug. And I was just like, well, this is what the doctor said I needed. And so I just spent the money and I went back and he was like, Why did you do that? And I'm like, I know you said I needed this drug. And he's like, No, if it's ever that much. He's like never he actually left the room, went and called the rep immediately in the middle of my appointment. You told me it would be this much for my patients. It is not like he was livid that, that that drug cost me as much as it did.

Scott Benner 23:15
I'm hearing I'm hearing the Endocrine Society. I think that's what it's called is starting to talk about Metformin, like for a type two diagnosis is not going to be an instant prescription anymore. I think they're going to start moving people towards these GLP one injections.

Kim 23:33
I think I could, I could totally see how that would be awesome. Yeah, but they put me they put me he put me on a drug that was essentially Lantis and Victoza like a combination drug. I can't remember what it's called now had a weird name

Scott Benner 23:49
Lantis and Victoza combo. Yeah, it was

Kim 23:54
tried to look it over earlier. I just can't remember what I tried to look it up in my prescription history. And then it had a an issue because it's like, a million years ago.

Scott Benner 24:09
I don't see that. It's, it's,

Kim 24:12
I mean, when I when I went off Zoltar phi, that's what it's called.

Scott Benner 24:18
Well, look, it's all stuff I got right out here as homeless

Kim 24:21
I got. Yeah, I indeed. I did.

Scott Benner 24:23
Xul to pH y.

Kim 24:26
Yes. All right. Let's see. And it was but what what ended up happening was it was just too much insulin for me. So I was having lots of hypose Yeah. And so eventually, but I still needed an upper dose like i i Take Victoza so I'm on sembly Victoza loon Jeff. And I still take Metformin. So those are my my four meds that I'm on. You're on Victor.

Scott Benner 24:58
Yeah, you should talk to them. About a GLP, like one of the newer ones. I

Kim 25:03
agree, I totally agree and I have an appointment next month. Honestly, if I can say a couple of things about the podcast because I don't want to run out of time and not have the opportunity to say the ways that it has just changed my life.

Scott Benner 25:20
Hey, can you do that? Can I just say something stupid so I can put the ad. Okay. There's also five has a tagline it says, when it's time to intensify think exemplify what in the world, whoever wrote that you should be ashamed of yourself. Intensify what I don't know. But I really didn't want to go too much farther without saying that. salsify is a type two medication. I didn't want people to get confused. Well, but but they're giving it to you.

Kim 25:51
Yes. So the, the thing I want to say about the podcast is a Eve me. So I went to the diabetes education course that was recommended by my GP. And it was, I mean, it was good in some respects. But like, I already knew what a carb was. I know that everything in our body ultimately breaks down to glucose. So I understood that fat and protein I didn't know know it, but when they said fat and protein breakdown at different rates, it will cause a rise late, you know, different times. I was like, okay, that totally makes sense to me when there are people in the classroom like, No, that isn't fat. It's not glucose, you know, like, yeah, so. So it was helpful in some respects, but, but a lot of it, like I already understood a lot of it. The podcast, gave me information knowledge that I needed, so that when I went to my endocrinologist, I could communicate intelligently and ask the right questions. And my endocrinologist is amazing. I absolutely love him. And one of the main reasons is because he treats me like a partner in my care. I mean, you I read on, you know, all the diabetes, Facebook pages and stuff about Windows, you're like, This is how you do it. What I said to him, as I said, Look, I know that my, my carb ratio is, you know, one to 15. I said, I am almost never dosing that way. And the podcast gave me like the courage to dose appropriately for what I was eating and to try different things. Like I never I'm a rule follower. So I never would have broken out of that box of, you know, I took the right amount of insulin, I waited this amount of time, and I ate my bullet Cheerios and went to 400. Oh, like, I took the right amount.

Scott Benner 27:49
But I want to ask you a question about that. So is what you're saying is that they had your ratio one to 15. But your ratio needs to be stronger than that.

Kim 27:58
Okay. And so when I said my ratio needs to be stronger than that, and they said, I really, I feel like I'm just barely having enough insulin. By the time my prescription renews. Can you prescribe me more? And what he said was about how much insulin do you use a day? Let's prescribe it that way. And I said, okay, the most I'm gonna use in the day is, you know, 50 units, probably, and he's like, Okay, we'll prescribe 50 units a day. So instead of like fighting me on, well, Kim, you should, you know, really eat fewer carbs. You're using less. He just was like, Yes, you are managing. And I think probably if I had outlandish agencies, and I was trying to tell them how things were going, but my last well, and also you helped me advocate vodcasts helped me advocate for myself to get some more testing and to get a CGM, because I was diagnosed Type Two for two years. And my agency originally fell from 14.8 to 6.8, I think is the lowest it was before I started fast acting like Loon, Jeff. Oh,

Scott Benner 29:11
wow. That's, that's, hey, listen, you don't have to stop yourself from saying I helped you. I, you were like, you

Kim 29:18
helped me you helped me Scott. It was all you none, Jenny, just you. I'm

Scott Benner 29:23
just joking. I usually I try to like separate myself in my head from that probably sounds pompous to people, but I don't think of it as me I think of it as the podcast. But when you at one point you said, you helped me and then you stopped me said the podcast helped me and I thought, Oh, that felt good. I can take that a couple of

Kim 29:40
you can have it, you can have it because I just like it just gave me courage to take more insulin. And if I sit it, if I go to 300 to not stay there, you know, and and I'm still MDI and I've talked to my doctor about doing a pump and He, I know that obviously, you know, many people have had lots of success of keeping a wincy low but he's like you won't have as good a control with a pump as you have MDI is kind of what he told me because I have pretty tight control. Now, like my, my last I will call it unassisted, a one C was 5.9. When I say assisted I have because of the gastric bypass, I have to have iron infusions occasionally. And because my, I just don't absorb iron well through my stomach anymore, and, and can become pretty anemic. Like my, my Favoriten ferritin is like has this huge range. It's like 32 to 250 years, the normal range, right? Yeah. And mine was two in December.

Scott Benner 30:55
I think my lowest was 11.

Kim 30:57
Oh, yeah. And you just you feel like you're so tired. You know, you feel like, you know,

Scott Benner 31:03
I just described to somebody recently, and I said the closest I can, I can get to explain to you what it feels like when you're five or 10 is that low? Because I just felt like I was dying. Like, like, I was actually like, worried I was dying. Yeah, you know what I mean? Like, I'm like, I don't know this feeling. It's very upsetting. I'm weak. I can't I'm dizzy. Like this must be dying right here. You know,

Kim 31:26
I apologize for laughing when you said that you felt like you were dying, and that your death is not funny to me. Nor your feelings of death are not funny. I just sorry. I laughed.

Scott Benner 31:37
I think you were just laughing because I deliver words in a fun way.

Kim 31:40
You really do. You're very funny. Of course job.

Scott Benner 31:44
Thank you. I'm hilarious. Well, by the way, that's something I do online, because it's so dry in writing. People. People will say something nice about me. And I'll go Oh, yes. I won't even say yes, I just go. I'm hilarious. And I put a period. And I, in my mind. I'm like, That's so funny. And then I think everyone doesn't know that. That's supposed to be funny that I find that funny.

Kim 32:10
Yes, I teach high school. Yeah. And so I consistently am saying, because that was a joke, guys. You guys, that was a joke. Yeah, man, you guys really funny. And the kids that you know, they write in my yearbook at the end of the year, and they were like, it's really funny when you think you're funny. Because I do find myself hilarious. My husband always says that I'm my own biggest fan. He's like, I've tried. I've tried to be your biggest fan, Kim. But you, you are an even even bigger fan of you than I do.

Scott Benner 32:45
Once in a while, every couple of weeks, I've re listened. I just pick out an episode randomly and listen to it to make sure it sounds the way I want it to sound. This morning, I listened to the diabetes myth about snake oil. And I have to admit, I left one time, and I thought it's probably wrong for me to laugh at something that I said. But

Kim 33:04
no, it is like if you're not going to find you funny. Really? Who is I guess we'd be in trouble. We have a responsibility to find yourself funny.

Scott Benner 33:12
So let's make sure I understand this. Yes, the podcast really made the podcast is giving you the opportunity to learn things you wouldn't learn elsewhere or otherwise. And the feeling like it's okay to go into a doctor's office and talk about it. But yet you tripped me up a minute ago. I don't agree with your doctor about a pump making your controllers that I agree. So

Kim 33:37
I think I think that, I don't know I'm, I'm kind of scared of a pump. Just because I really I've been MDI for I've only been properly diagnosed for about I guess it's coming up on two years. Two years. Halloween. Yeah, two years on Halloween, we'll be and I'm comfortable MDI, and so, but I like when I listen. So I haven't listened to a ton of the pumping episodes because, you know, they don't apply to me. Well,

Scott Benner 34:08
couple things. I don't care if you get a pump or not. That's my first thought. The second thought is the pumping episodes do apply to you. They apply to everybody. It's just using your is just using insulin. And third, it doesn't make any sense that for a doctor to tell you that your control would get worse. If you moved off of MDI. The only way I can wrap my head around that is if the doctor believes you're being over basil old, because that's what they do to MDI patients. Sometimes they give them too much basil because they're afraid they're going to forget to Bolus and right maybe they just think that you're coming to this number through a little bit of luck. And if that's not the case, then I don't understand the statement about

Kim 34:52
I think I think what he's thinking is because my average glucose is below In the control setting on the pump, like what is the pump like 120 is like, well, I don't know, because I don't have a pump you can

Scott Benner 35:08
do so. You mean like your target glucose?

Kim 35:12
No, like, like where it will automatically like,

Scott Benner 35:16
Oh, you're not just talking about a pump. You're talking about an algorithm. Yeah,

Kim 35:20
I guess that's what I'm okay. Okay. All right. 112

Scott Benner 35:23
and a half for tandem 110 For on the pod five loop is the do it yourself algorithm I Arden's targeted right at five on loop, I think are 90 right now. Maybe.

Kim 35:34
Okay, so yeah, I, I would absolutely if I decided like I wanted a g7. And I was like, Hey, will you please write me a prescription for a g7? Because that's what I want to do. And he was like, Sure. And when I wanted to CGM, I said, I think I would really like to know, because I was finger sticking like, I don't know, 150 times a day. Not really. But you know, just I am very dedicated to making sure my care is good. Yeah. Because Because long term I'm like, oh, every time my blood sugar spikes, you know, over 160 I'm sandblasting my insides I don't want to do that. Doesn't

Scott Benner 36:17
feel good. You don't feel well, well, either.

Kim 36:21
No, I feel fine. I could sit at 200 all day long and, and be perfectly happy. Like, I physically feel almost no adverse effects. When I was like, 400 all the time. Yeah, I felt like crap. But at 200 I don't have a headache. I don't. I don't feel grumpy. I mean, I'm grumpy because I'm like, frickin I totally screwed that Bolus up or you know, whatever, whatever thing that it's annoying to me. Yeah. But physically, it's it's scary. I wish I felt worse when I was high. But I don't really does

Scott Benner 36:58
illustrate the, the one of the main issues with the higher blood sugar because it is causing you a physical harm. Right. And if you don't notice it, then, you know, why would you react to it?

Kim 37:10
Right. And because of the podcast, because of you, Scott. There you go. There you go. Yeah, I switched my setting to be between a to start my high alert at 150 instead of when it's a 150s. My my said hi, good for you.

Scott Benner 37:33
That's excellent. It's it's the easiest and simplest way to lower your variability in your agency is to lower your higher alarm. Yeah.

Kim 37:41
And so is isn't always effective. I was actually listen to Dana's episode this morning. And when you said that, Arden you rarely have arrow up or arrow down. I was like, well, someday, Scott, some day I'll not have arrows up or down. But I'm still in the land of just, you know, trying to figure it out. Really? Yeah. And experiment. I mean, human petri dish. Yeah. Two years

Scott Benner 38:11
into it as an adult, you're doing terrific. Like, you know, that's just I mean, no straight up. I'm not over exaggerating, like straight up arrow on a CGM double up, I haven't seen a double arrow forever. But it's straight up arrow down or straight down arrow, we don't get those. So like, and that's just a function of balancing your insulin against the carbs. Well, sure. But that's

Kim 38:39
well, and I think, like a little, one of the reasons I would love a pump, I think is because I'm a teacher. And so when it comes to like, getting ready for lunch, I'm not like, well, scuze me for a second classroom full of 50 kids, I'm gonna walk into the other room and shoot up but you know, a little insulin.

Scott Benner 38:59
So would you feel differently about Pre-Bolus in for a meal in front of the class? If it was with a pump? Do you think I

Kim 39:07
would have no problem with the pump? Because it'd just be like, boop, boop. And I am not. I know some people feel shame with diabetes, or they, they want to hide things. And I am simply not that person. Like my we did a meme contest. I'm a choir teacher. We did a meme contest at the end of the year. And it was like this meme of, and it said Mrs. Mrs. Kim, because you don't want to know my last name, teaching trying to teach choir and then in the back, it's like this lurking figure, her low alarm, you know, so it's like, I tend to sit lower rather than higher because I would rather treat really quick than sit at 200 You know, it's it's easy to just eat and then so but consequently, my low alarm is, is going off and then my students will say, are you trying to die and I was like, Yeah, or no, or it's the first day of the, you know, of my Dexcom. So it's all jacked even it thinks I'm dying, but I'm not or you know, whatever things so. So if I had a pump, I would 100% Just do that Bolus, well, yeah,

Scott Benner 40:16
not that I just I, by the way, it's not that I don't understand, I just want to make sure I'm, I'm clearly getting your vibe, you don't want to inject something in front of the kids. It's just that like, one of their parents would call, well,

Kim 40:30
here's what it is, I injected my stomach, because when I injected my arms and my legs, I get these really big red welts. Oh, I don't get them on my stomach, I get them on my arms and legs, and I bruise really bad. Pull up your shirt. So yeah, I don't want to be like, whipping out my belly. And as previously stated, I had a gastric bypass. So I have an ample amount of extra skin to inject into. So you know, I don't want to whip out my belly and be like, you know, shooting up, although I'm not, I'm never shy about needing to dose if the kid walks into my office, while I'm giving myself an injection. It does not faze me in the least. Like it just is what it is. Okay,

Scott Benner 41:14
well, that's cool. I mean, also fairly respectful. You know, 50 kids, any kid?

Kim 41:21
Well, any kid who might be woozy about needles, you know, you have a kid who has a Basal bagel thing about needles, and they go down, you're like, Oh, crap,

Scott Benner 41:30
it's easy to weed out the weak ones. That way, that'd be great.

Kim 41:34
The other thing that I have loved about being really open about it, is I have several type one students. And so it is one of those things where it is a bonding thing where we understand each other. And, and a lot, some of them, you know, were diagnosed it, but to, and some of them it's been, you know, they're a year in or two years in. And I'll have you know that I always suggest your podcast, Scott,

Scott Benner 42:02
thank you.

Kim 42:03
Thank you, I suggest you to people. I mean, it's weird

Scott Benner 42:07
if you say it that way. So go back to the podcast thing, I started getting uncomfortable with it.

Kim 42:10
You know what, you can't have it both ways here. You either take the credit or you don't, I'm

Scott Benner 42:15
trying to have it both ways. And I feel like I'm accomplishing

Kim 42:20
it's a cool thing to be able to. But of course, I worry about them. Like, like, Oh, yeah. You know, I had a kid whose low alarm went off in class. And it went off, I think, three times. And I finally looked at her and I said, Are you going to do something about that? She's like, I guess? Like,

Scott Benner 42:40
I was waiting till I was dizzy, but okay. Just hoping it wasn't gonna happen. Yeah, I get that. Alright, so, wow, this is a lot. You've been through a fair amount in your time?

Kim 42:53
Well, you know, it, it's just kind of one of those. Those weird things. My parents had never treated my heart stuff. Like it was a big deal. Not that they didn't care for me. Like I always had regular care. They were, you know, I had heart surgery at eight and again at 14. And then when I was 27, or eight. And so they have always been, you know, very good about my care. But as one of seven kids. i It wasn't, we just didn't make a big deal about it. Well, they

Scott Benner 43:29
would have the energy to make a big deal out of it. Yeah. Seriously.

Kim 43:32
I think it was more that they didn't want me to freak out about it. Yeah. And I didn't have any adverse physical like, I never had any restrictions of what I could do what I couldn't do, like, I just lived a normal life. Aside from all the heart surgeries.

Scott Benner 43:54
But are there any follow up surgeries needed for your heart? Are you do you feel done with that? No.

Kim 43:59
So I just went to the cardiologist last month, and it was kind of like the first time that it is a progressive, like I'm on the train. I'm on the tracks. That's what the doctor said, you're on the tracks. Like there's there's no getting off the tracks. This is from birth. So I have a bicuspid aortic valve, which means there's two flaps instead of three flaps on the valve. So that causes a heart murmur. And that valve is hardening over time, because it's you know, kind of overworked and stuff, and then the ascending aorta is getting bigger because my descending aorta is like, pinched and twisted. So I had to angioplasties to train, like, spread that part out. And then they went in and put in a stent after that. But as sent essentially, someday, the valve will crap out and it'll send me into congestive heart failure, and the ascending aorta expanding. So I'll need a valve replacement at the least and a whole new aorta at

Scott Benner 44:58
the most did Give you a timeframe for that.

Kim 45:01
The timeframe for the valve has always been 20 years when I was 20 years old I went in. So probably last about 20 years when I was 40. I went in, still looking pretty good, maybe another 20 years. So I have a hereditarily, low heart rate, like really low. Okay, my resting heart rate is in the 40s of most of the time 40s 50s. It has been as low as the 30s. If I'm in the hospital, they have to turn the monitor off to let the alarm off. Yeah, cuz it'll beep all the time. My personal theory that is none related to anything, the doctor says that my heart beats like half as many times as normal people's hearts. So maybe that's why it's lasting a little longer.

Scott Benner 45:43
You're not using it up as quickly.

Kim 45:44
That's right. But it is like the last appointment I had. My aorta had grown, the ascending aorta had grown 50% faster than they expected it to

Scott Benner 45:56
be Excel. And that's probably another reason why you're so careful about your blood sugar to Yes, because

Kim 46:02
I already have all of these comorbidity factors. Yeah, it's like, have you seen the King of Queens? Yeah, I've seen that show. And you know, Kevin, James is a heavy guy and Leah remedies, the skinny thing, but she smokes, and they're meeting with their life insurance guy. And they each have these bad habits. And they're like trying to outdo one another. And so my husband and I always talk about like, like, dude, I'm totally going to out die you like, I will die first. There's no two ways about I got like 85 things it's, I could have could be the cleanest living human on the planet. I'm still gonna die before you eat another cheeseburger.

Scott Benner 46:46
You're very good attitude about all this.

Kim 46:51
I feel like what are my options? Can I control whether or not I have a heart condition whether or not I have diabetes, I cannot. The only power that I have is to control how I react to it. And I can let it make me bitter, and hardened grumpy and hate everything. Or I can let it make me be a kinder, more compassionate person. And the person I want to be as a kinder person. And so instead of not to say, I mean, the first two years, I went to the endocrinologist, I think I cried. Probably every other every other appointment just because it was hard, was, it's hard to know that for the rest of your life, you will never take a bite that you don't think about. You know, there's it's just always there. And so that sucks sometimes. But we just, you know, try to like when my little alarm goes off. My husband said one day, because I am an off the scale extrovert I love center of attention is my jam. You know, like I think I'm very funny, similar to someone else I know. Or now No. And and so one day my little alarm went off. And my husband looked at me he's like, Oh, was it not about you for five minutes, Kim. And so that's like the running joke in the house. Now if, if my low alarm goes off, it's because it wasn't about me for a few minutes. We got to bring it back around to me. Do

Scott Benner 48:22
you think that's a joke? Or do you think that it's overshadowing people's lives?

Kim 48:28
I absolutely think it's a joke, my husband. While I was actually in Dana's episode today, I was listening and thinking about like, My husband doesn't follow my CGM. He doesn't follow me on on my decks. In fact, nobody does. Like I do all of my own management. I talk about diabetes all the time. In fact, I said, today's my episode that I get to that I'm like, recording, he's like, it's your favorite topic. So he is unendingly supportive and has listened to hours upon hours of diabetes, everything. He thinks I am the greatest thing in the world. Like he he legitimately I always joke that he thinks the sun shines out my butt. Like he just adores me in every way imaginable. And so, so it is, I'm sure sometimes he's like, Oh my gosh, if I have to hear about diabetes again, you know, rolling his eyes a little bit, but he is eternally kind and patient and lovely. Wonderful. Yes. Just the very best.

Scott Benner 49:36
Maybe sunshine does come out of your button. You just can't see it.

Kim 49:41
Perhaps Yeah, perhaps it wouldn't surprise me.

Scott Benner 49:43
Don't let your kids hear this because they're gonna wonder how he knows that it comes out of your button. Okay, to explain, you know what I mean? Oh, my God.

Kim 49:54
I mean, it's there's gonna be an after dark episode here. After

Scott Benner 49:58
Dark episode Oh no. Unless there's something you want to tell me and then we can switch this over very quickly or

Kim 50:05
things I want to tell you. It feels like this is getting surprisingly close to a butthole adjacent.

Scott Benner 50:12
A great title though I'm proud of myself. Oh, my gosh,

Kim 50:15
that was I laughed out loud multiple times in that episode. I was just like, Well,

Scott Benner 50:22
I was at a family gathering recently, and people were talking about things they were proud of. And I said, I one time thought to call it a podcast episode, but Hola, Jason. And I wasn't kidding.

Kim 50:32
Wait, are you going to call my episodes? Sunshines? out my butt? No, of course

Scott Benner 50:35
not. It's not a real thing. It's a thing you made up. Whatever

Kim 50:39
you don't know.

Scott Benner 50:42
Real? Not even real. Yeah, I don't know what to call yours.

Kim 50:46
You could simply say that I'm delightful. That's what I like. Don't

Scott Benner 50:50
say don't go fishing. That's totally, you know what I mean? I did it already. We both can't do it. We both got to it first. Please. I got people are not laughing it like he does it every time. And I don't do it every time.

Kim 51:08
Sometimes, I would like to believe that, but it's just not coming to me. I

Scott Benner 51:12
have to be honest, I think self deprecating humor is the best humor. So

Kim 51:16
it is it is so funny. 100% of the time,

Scott Benner 51:20
you're never gonna know how serious or not serious I am about the things I say about myself. I will tell you this. I'm here's the thing I'm proud of. I know I have a reasonably comedic mind. Because you know how when people think of things, they seem off kilter, you're like, they must really think about that. You mean like they joke about something horrible. And you're like, they probably really think that they probably are going to kill a hitchhiker. Like, like that kind of stuff. I am. I think the things that pop into, I don't think I'm I know, there are things that pop into my head that I string together and say that I have literally zero connection to they just they just seem like the most bombastic, ridiculous thing to say in that moment. Yep. And so yeah. My wife used to be like, Are you like thinking about that? And I'm like, No, not at all like that. I'm like, random stuff doesn't just pop into your head. She's like,

Kim 52:17
all right. Like, no, I'm not a freak, Scott. And

Scott Benner 52:19
she goes, but you'll say it like, like, we'll leave her mother's house and her mom will be like, what do you guys got planned for the rest of the day? And I'll say, I'll just very dryly, I'll say, oh, you know, we have a little bonding time coming up. We're going to pick up a homeless person and murder. Just to see what it feels like to kill a person. And and then they're staring and I go goodbye.

Kim 52:45
Now, some people would call that comedic timing, and other people would call that being a sociopath. Yeah, they're

Scott Benner 52:52
wrong about that.

Kim 52:55
Messing with, you know,

Scott Benner 52:56
a bunch of homeless people start disappearing near my house. There you go. There you go. There we go. I don't think you shouldn't look into me. I'm just I'm just saying really strange things pop into my head that I have no real association to.

Kim 53:11
So I'm glad to hear that. I'm glad that all of the murder you spoken of today is not a real thing for you. Yeah,

Scott Benner 53:17
Murder. Murder is a new thing. I'm just getting it. I'm just getting into it. Now. It hasn't really I don't know where it's gonna go yet. But But seriously, like, just isn't like dumb joking. I also don't get why you can't joke with people about things like, I know it makes you uncomfortable. Like if I were to start talking about like, you know what, I can't even use any of the words

Kim 53:40
I am on the edge of my feet. It's going to make me uncomfortable. I can't

Scott Benner 53:44
use any of the words that just came into my head. So I'm gonna bleep it all out. Okay, Kim. Okay. All right. Okay. What came into my head to say was, I know it would make me uncomfortable. It would make you uncomfortable. If I like you said your mom had seven kids. So if I said something like, well, your mom was a real or something like that. Like I know that would like make you incredibly uncomfortable because people don't like to talk about their parents like that. For some reason. Let me just write down the timer. I

Kim 54:17
said that my mom more uncomfortable than me.

Scott Benner 54:20
Well, you would think that all she did would have made her uncomfortable but see, that's how I could do it if I wanted to. Sure. Sure. I don't I hold all that back because this podcasts about diabetes and helping people pick it up and their thyroid and there is a family friend who said to me like I am not surprised you have a popular podcast. He goes I am stunned about the topic though.

Kim 54:48
What if your friend could pick what do you think he would? He would pick as your podcast topic. Gosh,

Scott Benner 54:54
I assume something where I could say your mom that they murdered? Yes. And that those made her really saw in a delightful way where people were laughing about it.

Kim 55:03
Right? I don't like I thought for sure it was gonna be something murdery based on today's conversation, I

Scott Benner 55:10
don't have any interest in that at all. Yeah, I mean, like, you know, some people like true crime and things like that I have no thought I just not at all. Not at all. I

Kim 55:22
was thinking about one of the I was like, Oh, I do have a funny, like, when I was undiagnosed, like a P story. Oh, my gosh, well, you just, I'm

Scott Benner 55:35
gonna finish my I'm gonna finish my thought I would be I would be more irreverent. And I would not be careful about language. Because I would prefer to curse a little more. I probably wouldn't do it much. But I'd be I'd love to be able to do it without bleeping it out. You don't I mean? Sure. But you know, it's funny. I was in the shower this morning. And I thought, I wonder if I could do this the rest of my life. Like, I'm gonna get older. Like, could I make a podcast as an older person. And I had this like, fleeting thought of like having a podcast calling described. And then I would just pick very, like simple things and describe them. And I'm like, I don't think that's the podcast, but that's what popped into my head swing, like a blade of grass or grout in between the tile like, just go to where those things were set up, have a microphone and then very meticulously describe what I was looking at. Maybe the episodes would be like five or 10 minutes long. And then I was like, that's probably not a good idea. Well

it's not I know, it's not. It's okay.

Kim 56:48
But sounds terrible. You should move on to the next.

Scott Benner 56:51
Yeah. But it popped into my head. I was like, that's not a good idea at all. But I'm like, Okay. Anyway, I have no idea. Like, I don't think you'll be

Kim 57:02
a lifelong podcaster. Like, is that what you're like? Not this podcast specifically. But like, I don't think

Scott Benner 57:08
I've been doing it for nine straight years.

Kim 57:12
So how many episodes do you record? A week?

Scott Benner 57:15
Four or five? Well, that's a lot. Yeah, I do. I do it every day.

Kim 57:21
Do you ever feel like you're gonna, like run out of people to talk to?

Scott Benner 57:24
No.

Kim 57:27
Do you? Like Have there been some that you've interviewed somebody? Certainly not me? Because I'm delightful. Certainly. But were you just interviewed somebody and you're like, that was like talking to like, a paper bag? Like just no personality? Nothing. You

Scott Benner 57:43
know, I don't really I don't think of it that way. Like, there have been a couple of people who are not my cup of tea. And I just have the best conversation that I can find to have with them. Okay, then when I then of course, their episode sits for a while before it gets edited and put online. And then No, no, no, they all do. I see where you thought I was joking. But but but when I go back and edit it, I do recall like, oh, I don't, I didn't enjoy this. And then there's this moment inside of me where I go, just like lose it, like delete it and like email them go, Hey, I'm sorry. Like, your file got corrupted.

Kim 58:19
But, but but I didn't email tomorrow. So

Scott Benner 58:24
I'm gonna send you that one just for fun. But, but I've never done that. And I'm glad I haven't ever done that. Because those are some of the episodes I get the most mail about sometimes. So what I've learned that there, they're not my cup of tea. There's someone's cup of tea. Sure, sure. You know, so I just interview them the same way I would interview anyone. There are people who are not natural talkers. Like I interviewed a guy a couple weeks ago, it was a great interview. But the truth is, if I didn't fill, it would have been 18 minutes long. Right. And but what I think what I've learned over time is this might be a little bit too behind the scenes, but there are some people listening who really do just want to hear me talk. And there are some people listening who went, I say it's true, right? And then there are some people listening who want to hear me talk to another person. And there's some people who are putting up with me, because the things I get out of the people. And there's some people who just think there's great diabetes content in here. And they're like, if I have to listen to this whole to get the good diabetes content, I guess I will, and like and that's all like, whatever. Like it's, it's all fine with me. But I don't I used to get scared. I used to think like, Oh, I'm gonna talk too much in this one because they're not as talkative but now I'm just like, well, that's what that's what this one is. Like, it's okay. You know, and you talked more than me in this one.

Kim 59:49
Did I now? Yeah, for sure.

Scott Benner 59:51
This is gonna be about like 6040 You okay, I can I mean, I don't

Kim 59:57
know what is it usually? Is it

Scott Benner 59:59
It's usually it's usually 6040. Me.

Kim 1:00:03
Oh, I like I up my game today. I am a talker clearly Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:00:08
I realize there were times I didn't want to run you over because I didn't like the way it would feel for the flow of the conversation. But I did want to say something and I couldn't get in.

Kim 1:00:18
Oh, sorry. Sorry, my mom, my mom always in the back of my head because I'm so extroverted. In the back of my head is my mom saying to me, listen more than you talk, Kim. Ask more questions, Kim. Again, it's not all about you.

Scott Benner 1:00:33
Forget the not all about you. I don't like it. When people say that. By the way. When people say to me, You know what I think privately in my head, go yourself. That's what I think in my head. But in my private life, I'm like, Yeah, okay. You can talk more if you want. You know, I'm not sometimes I'm talking because no one else is talking. But here's a really short, here's a serious question. It's gonna sound like it's not a serious question. Are you a little fat girl in your mind? Yes, yeah. Cuz I'm a fat boy, in my mind.

Kim 1:00:59
Yeah, forever. And I had a friend the other day, who's also a diabetic. And because of the podcast, I'm like, You should go back and get more testing done. Because my friend is anyway, I don't need to go into my friend's medical history, although it's fascinating. But they're a bigger person. And, and like I said, I love to bake, like so so much. And I'm not gonna lie. I am an excellent Baker. Like, if I ever decided not to teach, I would open a bakery. But they were saying to their wife, like, I know, you should never trust a skinny cook. But like Kim defies this. And I was like, that's because I am fat in my heart.

Scott Benner 1:01:41
He's like, I knew you were gonna say that. Not only that, because

Kim 1:01:45
yes, yeah, yeah, in my mind. Yeah. In my mind, it took me. So I had gastric bypass in 96. When I was 15. It took me probably 15 years. Before I didn't panic, if I had to eat in like a buffet kind of setting that I didn't think in my head. Everybody is watching every bite I take, okay, 15 years where and I had been at a, a normal, quote unquote, normal weight for all of those 15 years. Maybe a little chubby, but not morbidly obese, like I had been, I feel

Scott Benner 1:02:22
like it's that like feeling of like, you seem different than other people. And then although I grew up in a different time, like being like chubby was different. When I was young. I don't know if it's sure if it's the same now or not. But you felt different enough and outside the norm enough that you were working harder to be accepted? And I think, yes,

Kim 1:02:44
I think that's true. And I think that that's probably why we are funny people. Because I felt from the youngest age, I have to make people see past my body. Like I have to make them see me. And so I have always been the fat Funny Girl. You know, that's just and now I'm just funny, and with probably some body dysmorphia going on. So I have the opposite thing in pictures. Like in my mind, I'm really heavy. And I'll see a picture of me and I'm like, Whoa, like, I am a lot thinner than I thought I was. And I'm not like, I'm not tiny. I'm about 167 pounds. Now. I'm not huge. I'm not tiny. But when I see pictures of myself, I'm like, Oh, is that look like Oh, beard. I felt like my belly stuck out way further than that. Or, you know, whatever. No,

Scott Benner 1:03:42
I understand that. I am not sure for myself. Like, I don't think I was trying to make people like me. But I did. I did like what you said about like, feeling like you're magnifying your personality, like make sure they see this part. And we're so they don't notice the other part. And it's not crazy, by the way, because there were I knew people who were very athletic, who also had a lot of thoughts, but people just thought of them as athletic people. You know, so I, you know, you do want to get in front of that. Like, it's almost like you're like, Look, I know you look at me and I look chubby or whatever. But here are the thoughts. Awesome. Yeah, please consider judging me on this instead. You know, my sixth,

Kim 1:04:19
my sixth grade teacher. I my next door neighbor was like one of the cool kids in class, you know, he was popular. And we rode the bus together and we were great friends. We hang out all the time. We jump on my trampoline. We play basketball at his house, ride our bikes around whatever. My sixth grade teacher said to my mom at parent teacher conferences. It's it's like the kids don't realize she's overweight, because she hadn't seen a kid who was sick and I was. I weigh less now than I did in sixth grade. Like I weighed 202 pounds at the end of sixth grade is the end probably five six. It's incredible. Or five five? Yeah, so I have always not been a little bit overweight but significantly overweight. And I don't think she'd ever seen a student who wasn't an outcast because of that. And instead of being a shrinking violet and hoping no one would notice me, I was, you know, the polar opposite. Yeah, I was getting all of the attention.

Scott Benner 1:05:17
It's funny you said that, because I was gonna make the point. Like, I was not a sad clown. Like, I know, I just think, yeah, like, I was a person people enjoyed and liked and, and felt confident. Just, it felt like I was in the wrong body for my personality. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, like, it's almost like the words and the thoughts coming out of me didn't fit, what people would expect, how I looked, and I don't know if they even I'd have no idea if they thought that or not, I don't even know how consciously I was aware of it as a younger person. Right. You know, right. It's easy to think back on it. And pretend you knew, but I don't really know. If no, right? No, totally. Yeah. Anyway, it turns out, I may just be GLP deficient, which is a thing that they're starting to talk about now. So there's wait doctors, I don't have enough on it to talk thoughtfully about it yet. But they're starting to look into the idea if similarly to like, thyroid situation, like, you know, if you're hypothyroid you are making you know, the hormone but not picking it up well, or like you know, the way you the way your body can't kind of produce or process iron. Well, like, right, perhaps I just have like, my body's making GLP, but it's not using it correctly. So by flooding, tourists like flooding it by giving it extra, the same way, when you take like your tiersen or your Synthroid right, somebody takes that you're kind of flooding your body with that, that thyroid hormone, and then your body's able to pick up enough of it to work normally from that. And it's those are people thinking that that might be the situation because I have to tell you, as much as I'd like to say, I am eating slightly differently, like foods, like I've incorporated a couple of other foods that are healthier than what I normally do. But overall, I am not eating that much differently than I was before. And I'm really interested in losing weight. So it almost feels like this thing was missing. And once you put it in it was there and you get the added benefit of it. Making you feel full, so you can't overeat. And right you know, and it does shut off your brain from thinking about food completely. That's when you make when you eat

Kim 1:07:26
Do you feel? Do you get the same? Are you a person who takes joy from eating?

Scott Benner 1:07:32
I wasn't. But I'm really not now.

Kim 1:07:37
Okay. Yeah, I wonder what it would be like because I like everything about food is delightful to me. Like I like creating it. I like making it look pretty. I like eating it. And so I'm wondering what, yeah,

Scott Benner 1:07:51
you might change that for someone that for you a little bit. So the girl is wrong. Arden's home from school, the girls were all here last night, and when I got a FaceTime, they were like, 15 feet from me and I got to FaceTime. Can you it's 930. I'm finishing editing a podcast episode, can you make a sweet treat for us? And I was like, You're not even my daughter. I'm like, what, what, what do you want? And she goes, I'm like, can I get like sugar cookies? And I said, I think I have all the ingredients for that. So I finished up up here put up an episode. I'm a little behind right now. I'm catching up from a trip. So I'm working like I feel like I'm I feel like I'm giving you the episodes as you're asking for them. So I need your back ahead a little bit. Anyway, I go downstairs and make cookies. I can tell you look at the dough the dose perfect. I pinch it to try it. I eat it. It's good. It's what I think it's gonna be. I bake the cookies, the girls come down and get cookies. And then at the end, I took a cookie and took a bite of it. And I'm chewing it. I was like, I don't want this. So I just spit it in the trash. Yeah, then this morning, I got up and I'm like, dammit, like, I don't think I'm gonna eat one of these cookies I made. So I took another bite. And I was like, Yeah, I don't want this. Still not good. Yeah, so it just it didn't none of the like. I mean, I don't know what what are cookies do in my brain soft, Chewy, but crunchy, but sweet. That whole thing? Yeah, they didn't like make me anything. I

Kim 1:09:21
didn't hit any of those. I didn't care

Scott Benner 1:09:25
at all like that. Then I just thought I was just gonna sit in my stomach and I was like, I forget it. That was it.

Kim 1:09:30
So to me, that would be a totally gray existence.

Scott Benner 1:09:34
Can you like

Kim 1:09:35
Oh, world is gray. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:09:39
Like what did you say? Couldn't you just have more sex or, like I've

Kim 1:09:43
spoken like a man. I don't know like

Scott Benner 1:09:45
what you started like, you know, tightrope walking or? I don't know. Hey,

Kim 1:09:50
a tight rope. Oh my gosh, Scott. What? Come on. That is not a delicious cookie. What's wrong with

Scott Benner 1:09:57
you? Not because the cookies not really delicious is what I'm learning. Hang it just gives you a job. So you just need them or else

Kim 1:10:04
I, I will send you a different sugar cookie recipe. Because what you have made is not you're not doing it

Scott Benner 1:10:12
right by riding a motorcycle with one eye close. See if that does run up to a bunch of cops yelling Yeah.

Kim 1:10:21
I'm sure that will hit the dopamine release. I need

Scott Benner 1:10:24
to get some adrenaline somewhere. You know what I mean? Just start yelling. I'm crazy and run towards the cop. Right? Wave your hands in the air. I bet you that'll get y'all lit up for a while. I honestly what it's what it's telling me is that those like those ways that you contextualize and most people contextualize food, they're not real. Like, oh, it's so good. Or it tastes so great. Or like whatever like it. That's just the that's the dressing. Like, that's the window dressing on the dopamine hit. Like it's all it is. Like so, you know, if you could put dopamine in a vape pen, I think you could feel the same way you feel is when you like eat a cookie.

Kim 1:11:09
Wait, isn't that like what meth is? Just kidding.

Scott Benner 1:11:13
I don't know is that you live in the northwest. No, I

Kim 1:11:15
have no idea. You're right. I live where everything is legal. Everything is legal.

Scott Benner 1:11:20
Yeah, Rubble, Oregon made everything legal. Right. Like they did. It is. I wonder what the long term impacts of that are? But I bet you it'll end up being a new positive. Eventually. No, you don't

Kim 1:11:31
know. I know. Because I live I live it every day. i You seem seen the impact of that not been? It's, it's, it is awful. I think it's awful. Because there is no, because because people who are under the influence of XYZ, whatever, don't care for themselves or their environment, you know, in a way that you are I might, who are I? I can only speak for me. I am not under the influence of anything besides insulin. Well, but they, they're, you know, lots of places in our town that aren't safe any longer. And the police can't do anything because it's not a crime to do drugs out in the open. It's not a crime to uh, yeah. So well, here's what,

Scott Benner 1:12:24
here's what I'm gonna say not that I want to see somebody doing meth at the 711. But right. The proponents of this idea are saying that things were so out of control in Oregon to begin with, that, obviously, what was being done was not helping anything. And that that ratcheting it up more wasn't going to do anything else except make it more blackmarket and underground and that kind of stuff. So you're not helping people with drug addiction, you're just saving yourself from seeing those people I think is the idea behind it. Portland solo record 88 homicides in 2021, a 54.4% increase over 2020. The cops tie that to turf wars between drug gangs, causality is ultimately unclear homicides increased at a greater rate 58.3% from 2019 to 2020. So I think what they're saying is if you take away the illegal nature of it, you might fix other things. I mean, I don't know like, I'm not a salt sociologist. So a person who writes attention to people and knows what they're doing like that. But it's not worth not trying. And I'm happy if they're trying it in a state that I don't live in. So we'll see how, right Yes.

Kim 1:13:47
It's easy to it's easy to have an opinion when you're not living the day to day.

Scott Benner 1:13:52
Are you like personally seeing it? So

Kim 1:13:55
I would say what we have seen in our town is and I'm not in Portland, but I have seen Portland Portland's downtown is like businesses are moving out. They are Portland is in my opinion, a disaster. It is just there there is trash and there are tent cities there are people just I it's it's crimes, crimes being committed all over the place that they simply are just not dealing with any longer. So I now I'm not in Portland. What I see on the streets of my own town are big piles of trash, urine, feces in front of businesses, throw up needles, in parking lots, you know, blocks from a middle school. Well, you Tell me when you see things like this, and then, you know, like our, our downtown streets are almost unusable. Our main bike paths that run along our beautiful river have so many homeless people. And I'm not saying every homeless person is addicted to drugs or I'm not discounting people without homes as a general rule, certainly not. But what I have seen is a lot of people screaming at each other. And, you know, it's just,

Scott Benner 1:15:36
yeah, there's a US News World Report article, it says that Oregon's idea is to take the money they were using for policing and move it into support, and sure, and rehab and stuff like that, of course, unless some politician diverts that money to their lake house, and then maybe, there you go, there you go. But, um, so yeah, I don't know where we're going to help those drug addicts whoever can find, right. Yeah. I mean, I mean, it's obviously a problem. And it's not and it seems like prior what we were doing was hiding the problem, then it became so overwhelming that you couldn't hide it anymore, which is what you're describing is it's bleeding out into the streets. And we're, yeah, aren't used to seeing it. So it's, I mean, something obviously has to be done.

Kim 1:16:24
I agree. I agree. And I, if, if this works, I will be the first to say, I did not think this work. This would work and I'm wrong. How long do

Scott Benner 1:16:36
you think it takes to know a decade? Probably right?

Kim 1:16:41
Yeah, I don't know. I hope not to live in Oregon that long

Scott Benner 1:16:44
to find that or do you think you're moving?

Kim 1:16:49
I don't know. Maybe someday? Not. Not anytime soon. I got kids in high school. You have son who just graduated and a daughter who will be a junior, so

Scott Benner 1:16:57
Okay. Yeah. Well, we have to give them a chance to use meth on the streets, too. That's right.

Kim 1:17:01
Yeah. Well, I mean, we want them to do it with zero consequences. So they can get nice and hooked and just, you know, throw their whole lives away with no consequences. That's what I would really like for my children. You think?

Scott Benner 1:17:13
Do you think if your kid was going to do math that a consequence would stop them?

Kim 1:17:19
If that's true? Well, no, but a consequence might not but jail might be a wake up call for him.

Scott Benner 1:17:27
I don't know. Doesn't seem to work. It seems to put them in a place where they can get better drugs. That's

Kim 1:17:32
true. Yeah. I don't know. I've never been to jail. Are you speaking from personal experience?

Scott Benner 1:17:36
I mean, I've seen a couple of TV shows. Yeah, I mean, it's a it's a difficult it's obviously not as cut and dry as anybody would want it to be? No, but you know, and

Kim 1:17:49
it's it's such a multi faceted complex problem. Yeah. That I don't think any one solution will be the thing. Yeah. No, I'm not. I'm not saying I have any better ideas than right. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:18:04
I mean, I use this as an example. Like, if consequences were a deterrent, then like there'd be no teen pregnancy? Because that's because teens would go well, I'm not gonna have sex because the consequences that are making a baby that I am not prepared to take care of, but that doesn't, right, totally stop anybody. You know what I mean? I don't think I don't think a kid like saying yes to a bump of coke at a party when they're 16 makes them think like, wow, I'm obviously going to do this and then ended up in jail because of my meth habit. Yeah, wait,

Kim 1:18:33
you mean teenagers don't think things through you think

Scott Benner 1:18:36
any way you think anybody thinks. I like it when we say that like about teenagers, like I know, a lot of adults. And they're not any more well thought out than anybody else.

Kim 1:18:50
So I would hope I would hope as an adult that I think things through better than the teenagers I teach.

Scott Benner 1:18:57
Yeah, no, no, I'll get you drunk at a party and offer your coke and see what happens. You might be like, I got a heart condition and diabetes. And let me see. Yeah, let me see that. You

Kim 1:19:09
can't out die. Me.

Scott Benner 1:19:13
All right, Kim. You're delightful. Thank you so much. Yeah, yeah. We're gonna We're I don't know what we're gonna call this episode. So I figured out when I added it, but I do really appreciate you coming on and doing this with me. Thank you. Yeah,

Kim 1:19:26
it was awesome. Thank you. Oh, of course, hold

Scott Benner 1:19:28
on one second for me.

A huge golden thanks to Kim for coming on the podcast thing and telling her great story to us. And I want to thank you guys again, for hanging with me through a ninth year of the Juicebox Podcast, not just the ninth season, a ninth year. This year. We put up an episode every day Monday through Friday. 2040 6080 100 120 That's 240 episodes this year. You guys support it. I love you. I don't know what else to say. I hope you have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year. Where do you see what I have coming? Oh, you know what, on the last episode of the year, I'm going to tell you a little bit about what's coming on January 1.

Having an easy to use and accurate blood glucose meter is just one click away. Contour next one.com/juicebox That's right. Today's episode is sponsored by the contour next gen blood glucose meter. But it doesn't mean we've started I just want to know if you have any questions or concerns or anything you want to ask me before we start?

Kim 1:20:45
I don't think so. It is very surreal that you sound just like yourself.

Scott Benner 1:20:52
Oh, you know, all right.

Kim 1:20:53
I mean, listen to the podcasts like you sound like the podcast. I'm like, I'm fangirling a little bit right now. That's all. Well,

Scott Benner 1:21:00
listen, now the podcast has begun because I want to keep this in. So I can tell you this, right? We were where were we on Sunday, I was in the car with Arden and a friend of hers. And her friend is like, she calls me Scott. She goes, Scott, you should do voiceover work.

Kim 1:21:20
I say Does she know that you have

Scott Benner 1:21:22
a podcast? I know she does. But she's like you should do voiceover work. And I was like, yes, you're right. Someone should just give me voiceover work. She's like, seriously, I'd like for you to be in a cartoon or something. I was like, I would 100% do that. So anyway, there's 119 year old girl in New Jersey, who really believes that I should be getting voiceover work. Anyway. So

Kim 1:21:43
I hope that stream of income opens up for you. That

Scott Benner 1:21:46
would be lovely. I hear it pays well. And then from there, we started talking about this whole idea about how I sound and I told her I was like, I sound in the podcast, the way I sound in my head. But when I record myself on my phone, I don't sound the way I sound in my head. Interesting.

Kim 1:22:11
Yeah. Yeah, cuz I mean, frequently. When I hear a recording to myself, I'm like, Oh, that's really how I sound. That's too bad.

Scott Benner 1:22:21
Yeah, so I spent a little bit of time a couple of years ago. And I don't want you to think it's like it's some great change, but I tuned my voice on the podcast to sound the way I think I sound.

Kim 1:22:34
I like it. Yes, I like it. Why not?

Scott Benner 1:22:36
You're hearing me the way I hear me in my ears when I'm walking around.

Kim 1:22:40
Okay, well, good job. Thank you. You've done a great job.

Scott Benner 1:22:44
I don't know if I sound like you. Or, but here, Kim. Here's the freaky thing. What if that's not how I sound to other people in real life, it's just down to my day.

Kim 1:22:54
If we ever meet in real life, I'll be like, Scott, you have a very skewed sense of how awesome you sound in real life.

Scott Benner 1:23:03
I was like, Hey, Kim, what's up? That would be awesome. What do you think you sound like? Anyway, introduce yourself. Don't use your last name. We'll keep going. Okay.