#1371 After Dark: More Cate
Cate has an anti-social personality disorder that significantly impacts her ability to empathize, form meaningful relationships, and consider the consequences of her actions.
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Scott Benner 0:00
Welcome back, friends, to another episode of The Juicebox Podcast.
Today I'm going to be speaking with Kate. She's a returning guest. She was initially in Episode 716 called after dark Kate. Kate is here today to talk about her anti social personality disorder, and I want you to be aware that there's going to be some discussion about abortion. Please don't forget that nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin, don't forget to save 40% off of your entire order at cozy earth.com All you have to do is use the offer code Juicebox at checkout. That's Juicebox at checkout to save 40% at cozy earth.com when you place your first order for ag one, with my link, you'll get five free travel packs and a free year supply of vitamin D drink. AG, one.com/juice, box. Don't forget, if you're a US resident who has type one, or is the caregiver of someone with type one, visit T 1d exchange.org/juice box right now and complete that survey. It will take you 10 minutes to complete the survey, and that effort alone will help to move type one diabetes research forward. It will cost you nothing to help. Today's podcast is sponsored by us med. US med.com/juicebox you can get your diabetes supplies from the same place that we do. And I'm talking about Dexcom, libre, Omnipod, tandem and so much more us. Med.com/juice, box, or call 888-721-1514, this show is sponsored today by the glucagon that my daughter carries, G VO, hypo pen. Find out more at G VO, glucagon.com. Forward slash juice box.
Cate 2:05
So I am Kate. I still don't know how long I've been a diabetic for. I am from Canada, but in regards to what we're going to be talking about, it's we're going to be talking about it from the UK, because I was living in the UK at the time.
Scott Benner 2:22
Okay, UK. So Kate, you've done a thing. I'm going to be embarrassed here. I'm just going to go out. Just let me be embarrassed. Okay, of course, you have said once before we were recording, and now when we are recording, I still don't remember how long I've had type one diabetes, which before. Don't worry, you don't remember, which says to me, yeah, you and I have done this already. Yes, and your name, your name, is incredibly familiar to me. But, you know, a couple 1000 of these conversations, and everything gets blurred together a little bit, of course. So tell me, do you know what episode you were on the first time?
Cate 2:58
I have no idea the number. It was going to be an after dark episode. I'm not good with numbers. My memory is shite. So it's, I'm not, I have no idea you
Scott Benner 3:09
remember what the title was, Kate,
Cate 3:13
genuinely. It was actually just called that. It was like episode, whatever number, and then Kate, and that was it.
Scott Benner 3:19
How embarrassing for me. Hold on a second. Oh, 716 There you go, Kate, let me tell you. What else I know if I called your after dark. Kate, then I listened to it and thought there's no proper way to describe what happened here.
Cate 3:39
It was like a smorgasbord of, like a conversation, like, I think we talked about, we talked about, like, a whole bunch of stuff, yeah, like we talked mostly it was just about, like growing up and being into like drugs and and sex and being through like therapy and like surbicide attempts and all of that jazz.
Scott Benner 4:05
Cate has type one diabetes, and this conversation includes everything you've come to expect from an after dark episode. That's what it that's what it says. So anyway, okay, great. I feel like you're here for like, a targeted reason. So what made you reach back out?
Cate 4:21
So this one, it's generally, I know you're, you're always looking for kind of taboo subjects that I don't really ever find taboo. I think, am I
Scott Benner 4:34
always looking for them, or is that just the only ways i Well,
Cate 4:36
no, I feel like that's probably the only things that I pay attention to. Like, Oh, taboo. Hey, I can fit that mold. I was
Scott Benner 4:43
gonna say, because I have a I have a lovely four part series on resilience with a therapist and and, of course, just scads and scads of diabetes management, content and everything. I feel like, perhaps the only stories you have are these
Cate 4:56
are taboo. Absolutely, they're all. May be interesting ones. I feel like everything else is boring. Can be interesting, not boring. It can be interesting, but yeah, I just find, I find that the more that we talk about taboo, the less taboo they become. Of course, because I find life like, what's taboo to me may not be taboo to you, if that makes sense. And so I think it's this like social construct that we've put on and so I like to talk about them a to make people feel uncomfortable. Because I think you really start to kind of know somebody when they're uncomfortable, and that gives me great pleasure. It kind of defeats that, that whole you know, thing of beating down the taboo construct. I don't, I don't like it. I think it's silly.
Scott Benner 5:45
I would have already sung the shot a song, except I believe you're gonna say something very serious next. So I didn't. I didn't want to be like, sweet is taboo. And then you're all like, Have you guys ever eaten human meat, like, I wasn't sure where you're gonna go, so, yeah, yeah, no,
Unknown Speaker 6:05
I don't, yeah, I suppose I could be taboo.
Scott Benner 6:08
I mean, I would hope so, yeah. Hey, let me say this, if you're out there right now and you think eating human meat is not taboo, walk yourself into a police station. Just sleep and turn yourself over to the authorities, please, like, that's from for me to all of you again, if you've eaten human meat, please go directly to the police station and turn yourself in.
Unknown Speaker 6:28
Yeah, please. And thank you. Oh
Scott Benner 6:30
my god. And I have to say this too, if anyone out there has eaten human meat, and you're a great fan of the podcast, and you're really downloading everything, not you, okay, but yeah, but everyone, and also, let me go a little farther, don't eat someone who's also a fan of the podcast, because, you know, I need the downloads and everything. Yeah, okay, yeah.
Cate 6:50
And spread the word, you know, to all of your cannibal friends, if they're going to download and listen like that would be great. See,
Scott Benner 6:56
Kate makes a great point here. If you're to a cannibal party of some sort, I would appreciate if you'd maybe like, whip out your podcast players, show people how to subscribe. My God, all right. Well, this took an odd turn. I
Unknown Speaker 7:09
already lose listeners.
Scott Benner 7:13
So when I thought of the most taboo thing I could think of that was it, that's what came in mind. Yeah, that should tell you something. Well, it should tell you something that most of the things other people think are taboo, my brain just skip right over those things. Like, absolutely no. I was like, that's fine. No
Speaker 1 7:28
one's worried about that. Amazing. Yeah, all right, so what show on that subject?
Scott Benner 7:33
On a serious note, watch this take a left turn from hell. What? What are you on?
Cate 7:38
We're going so we're going to talk about abortion. Oh, Christ. Really, I know, I know, which is, like, in a lot of people's minds, is kind of up there with cannibalism. So, I mean, you know, almost like for like, but probably not quite,
Scott Benner 7:53
Oh, Jesus. Like, I really got to start reading the notes before I start. There's no
Unknown Speaker 7:58
fun in that. Scott, come on. Oh, my God, okay,
Scott Benner 8:02
I honestly had no idea that's what we were doing.
Unknown Speaker 8:04
I just that's fine.
Scott Benner 8:05
Okay, all right. Well, here we go.
Speaker 1 8:07
Here we go. I don't and to be fair, I was thinking about it
Cate 8:15
yesterday, maybe, probably because I forget things, and I had about 5 million reminders that I was doing this today, but I came to the realization that I don't think I've ever really spoke about it from like, start to finish either. Like, I was like, I obviously, I've been like, hey, partner. Like, who's my husband? Now? Like, I've obviously talked about it with him, and I've talked about it with my mom and my best friend, but it wasn't from like start to finish, if that makes sense, yeah. So this is gonna be really weird. This is gonna be strange for me. Yeah, let's
Scott Benner 8:47
do it. Okay, you're up for this. Listen, hold on real quick. I'm putting my feet up. I'm putting my feet up and let me change the mic configuration here. Guys are gonna hear a lot of noise. My desk is rattling around. All right, I need to, all right, I'm settled. This is okay. I can do this. I've done listen. I would like to be serious, obviously, and it sounds like we're gonna be very serious moving forward. But I have had conversations on this podcast. If you take insulin or so faucinyas, you are at risk for your blood sugar going too low, you need a safety net when it matters most, be ready with G, VO hypo pen. My daughter carries GE, voc hypo pen everywhere she goes, because it's a ready to use rescue pen for treating very low blood sugar in people with diabetes ages two and above that. I trust low blood sugar emergencies can happen unexpectedly, and they demand quick action. Luckily, jivo kypo pen can be administered in two simple steps, even by yourself in certain situations. Show those around you where you store jivo kypo pen and how to use it. They need to know how to use jivo kypo pen before. Situation happens. Learn more about why G vo kypo Pen is in Arden's diabetes toolkit at gvoke, glucagon.com/juicebox, gvoke shouldn't be used if you have a tumor in the gland on the top of your kidneys called a pheochromocytoma, or if you have a tumor in your pancreas called an insulinoma, visit gvoke, glucagon.com/risk. For safety information. I have always disliked ordering diabetes supplies. I'm guessing you have as well. It hasn't been a problem for us for the last few years, though, because we began using us Med, you can too us med.com/juice, box, or call 888-721-1514, to get your free benefits. Check us med has served over 1 million people living with diabetes since 1996 they carry everything you need, from CGM to insulin pumps and diabetes testing supplies and more. I'm talking about all the good ones, all your favorites, libre three, Dexcom, g7 and pump psych, Omnipod five, Omnipod dash, tandem, and most recently, the I let pump from beta bionics, the stuff you're looking for, they have it at us. Med, 88887211514, or go to us. Med.com/juicebox, to get started now, use my link to support the podcast that's us med.com/juice box, or call 888-721-1514, conversations on this podcast that in my wildest dreams I would never have expected to have had. And you know, I I will tell you that. I mean, I guess right now, trigger warning. Probably a lot of things are going to get said in this podcast that you know might be triggers. But here, here's the first one from me. I once received an email from a young woman, not I forget if she was maybe in her mid to late 20s by the time I spoke to her, sent me this passionate email that she wanted to come on the podcast and tell the story of her sexual assault in college and how it impacted her diabetes. And I stared at that email for a long time, yeah. And I was like, I don't what am I? How am I going to facilitate that conversation? You know, like, and why here? Why me? Like I did. I was just trying to make a podcast. You know what I mean? Like, I didn't think all this was gonna happen. I spoke to my wife about it a number of times, and then one day I responded back to the person. I said, you know, if this is a story you want to tell, like, I'd be happy and proud to help you get it out in the world. And she came on, and at the end of it, I don't know if I said it on the recording or when it was over, I was like, Was that okay? Like, did I do? Okay? Like, I didn't know what I was doing. So everyone get ready for me not to know what I'm doing again. Also, I'm just gonna put this out there. Now, my personal stance on this, I don't know if it's gonna come through or come out, but I think it's gonna be surprising to some of you. Anyway, okay, go ahead. I mean, listen, Can I be honest? I don't know that we need to start all the way at the beginning. Okay. Also, I'm gonna have to stop myself from making stupid jokes like that one. But let's go ahead and go. You. Go ahead.
Cate 13:12
What do you it's fine, because I feel like I don't know, like there are things that happen that absolutely can laugh about now and then. There's still things that are, I still see as, like, traumatic, if you will, yeah, but I feel like it's, it's always easier to kind of get over, not over things, because I don't think you actually ever get over something, right? I think you just kind of learn how to let it be in your life, you know what I mean? So, but it's always easier to do that when you can, like, smile about it. So I genuinely do not care if we make completely inappropriate jokes, like, I don't care. I will absolutely, I don't
Scott Benner 13:53
feel like I'm doing that, yeah, but I'm gonna say this, that I'm gonna ask my first question, right? So everyone listening respect the fact that anyone else making a podcast would have edited the first 10 minutes of this out and just started with, Kate, you're on for a very after school reason, after school, special sadness reason today. And I would have I seriously, most people I know would be like, Oh, I didn't realize that's what we were talking about. I'm getting rid of that part. But not me. I'm gonna leave it in. So, yeah, yeah. Let's just start like by refreshing people on who you are. How old were you when you were diagnosed? I
Cate 14:26
was 11, turning 12 that year. How
Scott Benner 14:30
old are you now?
Speaker 1 14:31
I am. I'm gonna be 39 next month, almost in a month, absolutely.
Scott Benner 14:37
Let me do this with you. Take the nine and subtract one. You come up with an eight. You take the three and you subtract one. So 28
Cate 14:43
years ago, oh, there you go. It's easy. Look at you. Easy math. Well,
Scott Benner 14:47
not if you live in Canada. They teach you penguin feces or whatever they do, like, I don't know how they teach you people, you're you're feral, right? You just wander around eating fish heads and, yeah, no, I. Understand, you guys should build a city, that's all I'm saying. It would really, would really bring things around. Also, by the way, I don't know where in the Canada you are, but I don't know if anybody saw the news. Toronto can't handle a little rain. No. Jesus Christ.
Cate 15:15
They can't do it with snow either. Honestly, like they're in the news every single season because they have to, like, do an emergency whatever. They
Scott Benner 15:24
were swimming in the streets the other day. Yeah, they almost the port Isabel almost floated away. So 28 years ago, type one diabetes. Hey, your computer's making noises like, is there a way we can stop that? Because I know for certain you're gonna say abortion, and then it's gonna go bing, and I'm gonna be like, Yeah, I like, don't need that.
Unknown Speaker 15:40
That's what that is. Yeah, absolutely. So
Scott Benner 15:43
28 years ago, you're diagnosed. 11, turning 12 years old. We've gone over your whole story in 716, if people want to go listen to that after dark episode. At what point? I mean, let's just jump ahead. At what point do you become pregnant? So
Cate 15:58
I was turning 30 that year, so it was nine years ago.
Scott Benner 16:04
Okay, you're dating, you're married, you're with somebody.
Cate 16:07
I was dating him. So Tyler, who's my husband. Now, we started dating, March of 2015, and then I believe I became pregnant. I want to say it was May, May, June, July, August, yeah, so then it would have been at like, some point in May, I became pregnant.
Scott Benner 16:31
How long had you been dating at that point?
Cate 16:33
Well, we got together in March, so like two months. All right, yeah, see, I can do easy maths too. Look at that,
Scott Benner 16:40
yeah, no, I did you pull the goalie? Or was there were you already skating? No,
Cate 16:45
yeah, yeah. So, like, just because of my past history and just things that had happened in the past, just with my health and what have you, as well as, like, being long term with other partners and not like, I hadn't been on birth control for years and not using anything, because that was me being stupid. I never got pregnant, ever. I've never had a scare, never, ever, ever, like, so I just assumed that I couldn't, in all honesty, like, really, really stupid, but I just assumed that I couldn't, because I've never had a, like, close call, nothing like that. Here
Scott Benner 17:29
comes my first question. Jesus, sorry. So in your sexual history, were you, oh, god, how am I gonna do this promiscuous? No, no, no. I don't mean that. I mean when? Because, yes, no, because, because that's not what I meant, what I what I was trying to Oh God, what I was, oh my god. I don't know a way to do this. How, how were you avoiding it before you weren't just like, the ACT wasn't ending, oh God, inside of times, yeah, sometimes it was absolutely and you just weren't getting pregnant. You were like, obviously, I just can't get pregnant. Yeah,
Cate 18:05
like, like, I was like, I have PCOS. And I just, like, I just assumed, because it's happened often. I've been with, like, long term people quite a few times it like, it like, like, when I say completely ignorant, which most, like a lot of people are, when it comes to babies and getting pregnant and sex, I've
Scott Benner 18:27
seen the world go ahead, yeah, absolutely.
Cate 18:29
I just made the assumption that I wasn't able to get pregnant because I was 30. Had so many stupid calls, and it just never, ever happened, ever, like, ever, ever, ever
Scott Benner 18:43
was your attitude? Like, go ahead, throw it in there. Nothing's gonna happen. Yeah,
Cate 18:48
absolutely okay. And I was also, like, the way that I am, which also gets brought out in the first episode too, like that we first taught I have, like, pre deposition, I don't know if I'm predisposition. Oh, my lawyer, that's right, yeah, yes, what you said. Thank you for pronouncing it correctly. I feel like I have this thing, like nothing can happen to me, like I'm invincible. Oh, that's and that's not and like, kids and teens feel that way. Usually, you know what I mean, like, they got that really weird thing, but they still kind of tend to think that the really bad, bad stuff could potentially happen to them. But I don't have that. I don't I don't think of consequences to actions I never have. I doubt I ever will. It's just, it's just part of how I've always been. So I also like that has a strong play in it. It's like, yep, yes, this thing can happen. Yes, I know it can happen, but it's never going to happen to me. And if it does, like I it's not in me to think about it or whatever, like I've never. Or been able to ever, ever, ever, ever.
Scott Benner 20:02
It has a name, Kate.
Cate 20:03
I'm like a sociopath. Yeah,
Scott Benner 20:08
that's not the name I was thinking of. But I'm also, I use chat GPT here a little bit because I knew there was an answer to this question. I didn't want to fumble around for it. Also, I'm using this opportunity to say that if everything went well in the next four weeks, you guys have already been listening to a new series with my daughter called I don't understand where Arden and I sit down and go over a single topic that she legitimately doesn't understand. We talk about it and then break it down and then define it. Yeah. Okay, so the psychological mechanism that allows humans to believe that bad things can't happen to them is known as optimism bias. To break down the concept, optimism bias is a cognitive bias that causes individuals to believe they are less likely to experience negative events and more likely to experience positive events compared to others. Key factors of this people often believe they have more control over their outcomes than they actually do. This leads to a sense of invulnerability. Individuals tend to view themselves in a more favorable light, believing they are smarter, more skilled and more capable than others. I mean, optimism bias helps in managing anxiety and stress by maintaining a positive outlook on life and future events. This is actually it's a healthy thing for you to believe in yourself and expect that things won't go wrong. I've said this before on the podcast. If you were running around thinking stuff was going to go wrong all the time, that would be a mental illness. It would it would drive you into a problem. People may selectively focus on information that supports a positive outlook and ignore or downplay negative information with health, it's believing one is less likely to get sick or develop chronic illnesses despite engaging in risky behaviors, and it goes on from there. Yeah, there are benefits to it, as I said, and of course, there are drawbacks. But you had that feeling like I'm invincible, nothing's gonna happen to me,
Cate 21:57
yeah, but mine's tied into any social personality disorder, as opposed to optimism, which I like your version better. So that what we're going to start telling doctors I
Scott Benner 22:13
couldn't remember the enough of our conversation to ask. But if you were promiscuous at a young age, do you have bipolar or something like that? No,
Cate 22:21
so it's any social personality disorder. So I don't have empathy. I don't show empathy for anyone. I don't I don't have the ability to and never have incredibly impulsive kind of a better than thou way of thinking.
Scott Benner 22:39
Tell me if you heard episode 1253 last the beginning of this week, Ken. Ken, no, I had GLP meds impact mental health. Episode 1253 okay, definitely go listen to it. Okay, because a mom came on and laid out a story of her daughter who had is type one and has bipolar disorder, yeah. And they worked through, I mean, the problems are extensive, eventually getting the kid on lithium, which took away her suicidal ideation, but did not take away any of the other issues, and the rest of it went away when she started using a GLP. Oh, interesting, maybe, uh, inflammation, I don't know. Obviously not a doctor. Yeah, I'm an idiot who figured out how to pay for this microphone. Like, go listen to it. It's crazy. Okay, all right, absolutely, okay. So you have at the moment, anti so look at me. I'm so positive. I'm like, at the moment, till you get some we go V and then you'll probably be fine, by the way. Are the GLP companies not? Why are they not knocking down my door to buy an ad I'm obviously on the team. Like, come on. No. Okay, so that's who you've been, who you are. How has that impacted? Like, it sounds like you don't have any trouble forming private relationships. Do you have trouble keeping them? Yes. Okay, so when Tyler right? Yeah, when Tyler? I mean, listen, Tyler should have known better. That's first of all.
Speaker 1 24:07
That's why I tell him all the time. Yeah, your choice.
Scott Benner 24:12
Here's a PSA for boys, yeah, when a girl you've known for 60 days goes, Don't worry about it. Keep going. Here's what you do. You go, oh no, no, I paying for your Corolla. No, I see what's happening here. Okay, anyway, obviously terrible, pull out game. But
Cate 24:34
it just like, proves that. Like, I shouldn't say proves, but, you know, boys sing their penises a lot, yeah, so clearly, when you're about to jizz, there's no brain. There's no blood in the actual brain, it's just all in the penis. Being like, it feel awkward because
Scott Benner 24:52
you're significantly younger than I am, but once you get to that point, like you could probably say to me. If you keep going, I'm gonna like, you know, I don't know, kill your puppy. And I'd be like, he's lived a good life. You can make fun of boys all you want. And I don't know what it feels like to be on the other side of intercourse, but on our side of it, it's an awesome, yeah, yeah. Anyway, you can, you
Cate 25:21
get it. You can kind of understand poor Tyler. And where, no,
Scott Benner 25:25
no, yeah. If you would have killed Tyler in the middle of it, he could stop the Ukraine war, he'd have been like, you know, they've already got all those weapons. They probably want to use them. Tyler does what he does, and then you find out you're pregnant. What's the like? How does that I mean, two months is not a long time. So how does that conversation go
Cate 25:42
in all in all honesty, it's like, thankfully, Tyler kind of already knew my personality at the time, so when I find out, it's probably two months later, in all honesty, because I hide my periods, but they were not right, but I still had them okay, you know? So like it's thinking back now, definitely different from what the normal was. But it also wasn't weird for me to have a bit of an abnormal period. It would be weird for me not to have one at all, but it would be fine for me to have an abnormal period because I was still having them. It never even, like, I didn't even clock it, like, the first close to two months. So
Scott Benner 26:30
you guys have been together about four months at this point. Then when you're like, I think I got a bun in the oven,
Cate 26:36
absolutely like it is, like, we're into like, end of July, going into August. By the time I'm like, something is really wrong with me, yeah,
Scott Benner 26:48
okay, go to a doctor. Figure it out on your own. Pee on a stick. What do you
Cate 26:52
do? So, how to pee on a stick? So this is the thing about the UK. So I was in the midst like, so everything with Tyler, like, my relationship with Tyler accelerated greatly, even without that. Like, so I was in the midst of moving in with Tyler. My lease was up. We were kind of, like, in it to win it, you know, like, it felt great in more ways than one.
Scott Benner 27:17
Let me point out, Kate too. You got the you got the hormones running around too. You don't even realize, like, this is amazing. This guy seems like the right one, and I need to make a nest with him. Yeah,
Cate 27:28
I was not. I had a very difficult pregnancy, right? Honestly, the guy was, I must have been awesome in bed. Wait, wait, hold
Scott Benner 27:38
on, what? I'm sorry. I was
Cate 27:40
like, I must have been awesome in bed or something, because I was like, an utter bitch, like, like an absolute, if I'm going to go back to my UK roots, like an absolute, oh, like an awful, awful. I was just grouchy, and I was like, sick, and my numbers were high, and I was just,
Scott Benner 28:01
you're saying there wasn't a lot good, there wasn't a lot of
Unknown Speaker 28:04
good. Like, you know, let's move in.
Scott Benner 28:09
Like, this is great, yeah, bring your toothbrush lady with the velvet pocket. You come on over. Yeah. My gosh. Well, good for you, Kate, yeah. I mean, sounds like you got a you got something special going on? No, that's not right. In this conversation, you're not doing anything special, is what I'm saying,
Unknown Speaker 28:28
Nothing. No, all right, no, I got nothing. You've
Scott Benner 28:31
never walked into a room with a lamp and said, I have an idea. No,
Speaker 1 28:34
I got an idea. Okay, that would be, that's weird. Could be a
Scott Benner 28:41
small lamp. I don't know what we're talking about exactly. Yeah, I was probably thinking, Yeah, I don't know exactly what I was getting at. So, so he's into you big time. You're flooded with pregnancy hormones. So you think he's the greatest thing since, like, sliced bread. A lot of women will. I shouldn't say this. I'm gonna get people divorced, but a lot of people are, when they're on birth control, end up very attracted to men that they later find out when they're off birth control. They're like, I don't really like this guy. Amazing, yeah, but the birth control pill gives you that like I'm pregnant vibe, and you're you're looking for anybody who looks like they can put three squares on the table and maybe hug a kid once in a while. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So you guys are moving in. It's going quickly. You find out you're pregnant, you go to him and you say, hey,
Cate 29:30
like, I'm Hey, I'm pregnant. It's like, we both, I want to say we both went to the pharmacy to grab
Scott Benner 29:39
17 more privacy tests, yeah, basically,
Cate 29:42
like, we're trying to figure out which one's the best one most accurate, came back, like, peed on the stick and was like, yeah. So it's like, here's positive, like, but yeah, everything kind of just stood
Scott Benner 29:55
still. Not something you want. We're excited about. No
Cate 29:59
and. And I've, like, I've never really wanted kids like that. Was never that. Was never anything that I saw for myself.
Scott Benner 30:09
Do you have kids now? No, well, I
Cate 30:11
mean, I've got three dogs, and they are absolutely my children. So yes, but listen,
Scott Benner 30:17
I mean it with deference the dog lovers. I mean, yeah, okay, but you don't wanna be you. You've steadfastly stuck to that over the last eight years or so. Yes, okay, all right, so it's an ocean from you. What is it from him?
Cate 30:30
It's kind of the same, like, it's, it's more of like it was, honestly like a night of stunned silence, staring, like, yeah, and and like, okay, so what now is, really, yeah, like, it was a lot of, I think both of us kind of had, like, a bit of a panic face on.
Scott Benner 30:49
Who's the first one who, like, is brave enough to say out loud, are we keeping a baby? Like, who says that?
Cate 30:56
In all honesty, I don't know. And I don't know if it was me being like, I can't, like, I can't keep this. Or if it was me being like, what are your thoughts on not keeping it, or something like that, and I, and I also don't know if it was him being like, are you going to keep it, Tyler throughout the entire thing? Wasn't like, this is your decision. I'm not like, I'm not. It's not like he was pushing it on me, because that's not what he was doing. But he made it very clear that he was along for the ride no matter what, and that this was my decision like so if I if I wanted to be pregnant, if I wanted to go, go through with it, he was 100% super excited about it. If he saw, if I saw I wasn't able to and that my health couldn't sustain it, because I currently it wasn't able to sustain it, be able to not do anything, he was like, like, 100% on board with you. So, like, he was always there, but made sure that in the end, it was my decision, and he let me know that he was like, I've never aspired to be a dad. He was like, I'm happy if we have them. I'm happy if we don't. But he's like, but this isn't my this is not I wasn't like, I need to be a dad, and nothing else matters. You know? He was like, I have other aspirations. You know? He's like, would I would this be amazing. Yeah, would it not be? Yeah? Like it's fine, setting
Scott Benner 32:25
your health aside for a second and going back in that moment and even with with hindsight, can you beyond, I just never thought of having kids or didn't want kids? Can you put more context to what it is about being a parent that's not attractive to you? So
Cate 32:40
it has changed since, but it was just the whole I've just never, at the time, I never felt it. I've I have friends who like that was their number one dream, like, that's what they talked about when they were looking for a partner. That's what they like. They were all about it, you know. And it was, you know, when they talked about the future, it was about family. And I was like, I'm traveling the world, like, I've got it to do, like, I'm not, absolutely not. Like my friends have been having kids since they were, like, 16 and 17. Like, well, so
Scott Benner 33:20
you've been around it then, oh, yeah, absolutely.
Unknown Speaker 33:23
But it wasn't, um,
Scott Benner 33:24
give me a second. It's not, it's not that I don't like kids or I don't think I'd be a good parent. It's I'm trying to live a life here that I think would be slowed down by having children.
Cate 33:34
No, it was, I'm trying to live a life here that I don't see children in, okay, like, that's really, like, not that I would be slowed down a side thought, yeah, like, I'm not going to deny it. Like, I'm not going to deny that I absolutely think that children can slow you down. Do I think that they can stop you No, do I think that they can slow you down? Yeah? Do I think you need to think differently about how you do things? Absolutely well,
Scott Benner 33:58
it changes your course.
Unknown Speaker 34:00
Absolutely it does.
Scott Benner 34:02
Can I ask you if you if you had that baby, do you think you would have done that? Do you think you would have said, Okay, well, I'm gonna set aside the things that I wanted to do and I'm gonna raise the baby the way that I think that should happen. Or do you think you would have been Oh, do you think you would just be in Madagascar with a baby on your hip? No,
Cate 34:19
I don't, I don't know. I don't, I, honestly, I don't know, because, again, my brain doesn't think like that either. So like, I can't picture a future if it's not a possibility, and currently, like, it's it didn't happen. So I can't think of the what ifs my brain doesn't function that way.
Scott Benner 34:40
Tell me your fears of what you would have messed up with a baby
Cate 34:44
I had always like. So my biggest fear, and it still is, is that I don't have empathy. I don't have it at all I like and so how I care for people is very different. And how you would care for people, or how, like, how Tyler cares for people, even my own mother, like he treats her very differently than I do, and speaks to her differently. And so I'm very cognizant of like that you need a type of nurturing, I think, to be able to ensure that your your kid, kind of knows what the human ability is to be around others. You know what I mean? Like, I don't think I would want another one of me around, like, just hanging out like that. That to me, it's not a great it's not a great life to live. It really isn't like I know the vast differences between how I interact with people compared to others, and others get a lot more fulfillment with with being around people, and on being in their jobs and being in a family and being a friend and all that jazz. It's very different for them, whereas for me, it's I'm manipulative. I am uncaring, in a way that most would you know would see as caring. I am impulsive. I have I don't give a shit what I say, and I don't care about how any of it affects you. I don't care. I don't care if you're sick. I don't give a shit. It doesn't affect me. Why do I care if you're sick right now? Oh, you're dying. Sucks for you. Like, yikes,
Scott Benner 36:29
yeah. Like, something comes up on on social media. You're like, Oh my God, I don't know a famous actor died. You don't nothing.
Cate 36:38
And that's weird to me. Like, I've, like, there's been, it's Michael Jackson. People care, yeah, yeah, okay. Like, Michael Jackson, like this person that you don't even know, and my boss at the time was like, bawling her eyes out. And I was like, what the
Scott Benner 36:56
unstable to me, but whatever. What? Yeah, yeah. Don't judge yourself too hard on that one. Like, I was like, I was like, when, when somebody famous, I don't know, passes away. I'm like, oh, that's like, Donald. Donald Sutherland died recently. And I was like, it made me go. It made me go. Also Canadian. Oh, Canadian. I thought you said comedian. I was like, No, he's not. No. Canadian, yeah. And I um, correct. Look at me. I'm like, Yes, point for you. And I thought I stopped for a second, and I said, Oh, mash was such a good movie, and he was terrific in it. And I thought about a couple of other things he was in, and then I it occurred to me that he had worked well into the end of his life, and that we'd enjoyed him and things like all the way up to hunger games and stuff like that. And I took a second to tell my kids. I was like, Hey, that guy was a really good actor and and I was like, and his son's an actor too. And I was like, you know, have you seen this movie? Then I never thought about it again. And I did not cry. He wasn't one of my favorites or anything like that. But I felt like I had a reasonable reaction to that. Would you have not even gone that far into it?
Cate 37:59
Oh, no. I was like, Oh, he's Canadian. And then moved on with the end of it. Gotcha it that that was the end of it. Like that. I absolutely know he died, because it was all over my social but I was like, Oh, he's Canadian, and then there's nobody with that influx of like,
Scott Benner 38:13
oh yeah, we lost another race pirate, okay. And so let me, let me slow you down for a second. Ask you this question, can you characterize your day to day life? Are you happy, fulfilled when you think about what life is? What is it?
Cate 38:30
I don't know. I don't I don't know how to answer that question outside of it sounding like a scholarly answer, life is a life is a bunch of events that happens to you until you die, and some of them are fun and some of them are it, and it is just what it is. Yeah.
Scott Benner 38:56
I mean, that's pretty accurate. What's the most joyous thing that's happened to you in the last month
Cate 39:01
my and it weirds Tyler out, but like, My dogs are genuinely and I don't know why. I have zero idea why. But like, I know love, because I love them okay, and I know that. I know that full stop, like, I like, and it allows me to be like, Wow, so this is how normal people feel, like I don't even and Tyler knows it, but like the the type of affection, and to the extent of affection, and what I feel inside, that I feel for my dogs, I don't feel for My husband? Can I say that I love my husband absolutely in the in the manner of which I can and do absolutely, like yes, full stop as well. Is it what I think how you love your wife, or have loved your wife and love your kids? Know, Like, I know it's different. Couple
Scott Benner 40:01
questions, you're you're on that Titanic film, and you're floating on the headboard that you pretend only fits one person. But then you realize this thing's huge, and I could have easily gotten leaving it harder to Caprio up on this thing. And up comes Tyler and your dog. Who do you pull up on the headboard? The dog? And what do you tell Tyler? Anything?
Speaker 1 40:21
Love you like hopefully you'll stay alive in this ice, cold water.
Scott Benner 40:25
But the dog needs to come out. The dog though, the dog is, yeah, he knows this. Tyler's aware of this. Yeah. Were you abused as a young person?
Cate 40:35
No, do I have trauma? Yes. Did it come from that? No, this is just something, how I'm wired,
Scott Benner 40:41
Okay, what about Tyler? Lets him be okay with that. In
Cate 40:45
all honesty, I have no I do not know. I don't know. We have like, I am very open. I am very communicative. He unders like he understands. Because there are absolutely times where I have to go to him and ask him about like, human reaction, human emotion, and about whether or not this is right, like or not right, if this is normal, or if this person is overreacting like so he has daily conversations with me about people and their like, emotional regulation, and whether or not it's normal. He knows that. So, like, if we get in if he's telling me something and he's super excited about it, and I've never had the conversation before, I don't I don't know how to react, right? So a lot of my responses are learned behaviors. I mimic.
Scott Benner 41:49
You don't feel them or even mean them. You're just
Cate 41:51
i It's all Mimic, right? Like so this is how I know. I know how to sue someone when they're crying, because I've seen it exactly in front of me, not on a movie, like it's actually happened, and it's happened a few times. So Tyler is used to me being like, how do you want me? How do you want me to react? Like, what do you want me to say?
Scott Benner 42:14
Has he suffered trauma as a child? No,
Cate 42:17
no. Like, bless him. It's, I'm so lucky. It's stupid, like it honestly, is really, really stupid.
Scott Benner 42:25
He's so empathetic that he can make up for this. I
Cate 42:29
or he gets something else from it. I don't, I don't, I don't know. Or he doesn't understand. He doesn't understand. And then he does, because there are times where his face falls, it's like he's forgotten, and then he remembers who he's dealing with.
Scott Benner 42:46
Do you feel like you're letting him down when that happens? You don't do you
Cate 42:50
probably not to the extent that you would. Okay. So like, like, I do.
Scott Benner 42:55
You recognize it exactly. Donald Sutherland's Canadian, but then that's the end of it. Yeah, yeah,
Cate 42:59
yeah. And I wish I could do better. Like, I do say that, like, so I do have, like, which is also kind of like a doctor would say it, but you do have a bit of regret, like, you do kind of feel that consequence, but I don't align it the same way, but I do, I do want to be better for him,
Scott Benner 43:17
right? We don't want to do we don't want to be falling apart because Michael Jackson instead. But we'd like to sit around for a minute and go, Oh my god, man in the mirror is good song. Yeah. Okay,
Cate 43:25
yeah. And I want to be better for him. It was someone else, like, I don't have that for them. So I think he also recognizes that, like, how I am with him is actually very different than how I am with other people, and other people I've had in my life and that I'm supposed to love. You know that that has that relationship with me is supposed to be different, and he can see that it's it's not like I don't there's nothing there, right? Where there is something there with him? Yeah,
Scott Benner 43:55
let me ask two questions. They're gonna seem strange, but they're the ones in my head right now. This one's got nothing to do with me. I think is going to make a point. You listen to this podcast, right? Yes.
Speaker 1 44:03
How do you feel about me? I don't feel anything about you.
Scott Benner 44:06
Don't feel anything about No, that's fine. That's what I'm expecting you to say, Yeah, but you've gotten actionable information from the podcast. It's made you a healthier person. Is that? Right?
Unknown Speaker 44:14
Yes.
Scott Benner 44:15
Are you grateful? No, no. If I said to you, Kate, hey, I need 20 bucks, would you send it to me?
Cate 44:21
No, unless you, unless we made like, a deal, so unless I benefit from it in some way. No, you
Scott Benner 44:29
get done listening to an episode and you're like, God, damn, that's a great idea. I'm gonna do that next time I eat blah, blah, blah. Thank God Scott's alive. No, no. Okay, now some questions that in 2024 people definitely don't ask anymore, but I think they're important, and I'm just going to ask them please, please, if you don't want to answer any of them, just tell me you don't want to. I'm trying to think about this from Tyler's perspective for a second, and I'm going to get very, very surface, because you've gone through the deep stuff, and there's not a lot to swim in. Are you. Rich.
Unknown Speaker 45:00
No,
Scott Benner 45:01
are you hot?
Cate 45:02
I would say that I am attractive. Yes, yes, I do have that body that I have, a body that men are attracted to. Yes, okay, are
Scott Benner 45:10
you Ultra sexual?
Unknown Speaker 45:11
I used to be, yes,
Scott Benner 45:12
but not now, not now. No, because,
Cate 45:16
because there's no need to be unless I want something, because
Scott Benner 45:19
you got him, yeah, all right. So you were throwing that thing at anybody to get them in there, but now they're there, and you're like, I don't need to give it to you to keep you here, because you're staying, I can see you're staying. So like, there's no reason to do this.
Speaker 1 45:33
Or I like, they've they've lost usefulness. Does
Scott Benner 45:38
the sex bring you any pleasure. Currently,
Cate 45:41
it doesn't, not, because it's not good. But right now, I don't know for if that's going on. It's a
Scott Benner 45:51
well, you just stuck up for Tyler. That was interesting. Yeah, I know, yeah, because you were like, listen, Tyler can sling big. It's not his fault, okay? Like, so like, but it's not, but you nothing. You don't care.
Speaker 1 46:04
I don't care. Yeah, I don't care if we have it, like you do it, even though you don't
Unknown Speaker 46:09
want
Cate 46:10
to do in the moment. Like, I know that I get something from it. That's how I see it. Does that make sense? So he wants that. So the reasons why we have it are too different. So he wants to have it because it's intimacy, right? He wants to physically show his love for me. He likes that intimacy. He likes the touching. I can't stand him touching me. I can't stand people touching me. I see it as a thing that I derive pleasure from, but it's not long lasting. And once it's done, it's done, right? Like, it's not like, it stays with me the rest of the day. Like, yeah, it kind of puts me in a good mood, because the endorphins are going and what have you. And it's dopamine, right? But that is an everlasting to me that doesn't, that doesn't stay do? I constantly want to seek it out so that I can get it I used to. That's kind of the reasons why it kind of made me feel a bit more normal. So
Scott Benner 47:04
you're having a lot of sex at one point to make you feel more normal, because the endorphins,
Cate 47:08
okay? And because I got some it was like, Oh, I'm feeling something right. Like, when you kind of, it's not that I feel dead inside all of the time, but you're kind of feeling dead inside all of the time. So whatever, it's the same reason why I go for, like, I used to be extremely impulsive and put myself in really dangerous situations, because you were the jolt you get something from it, absolutely yes. Can I tell you something, what a way to be alive, amazing. Like,
Scott Benner 47:31
I was having a bad day the other day, and I went out and drove fast on purpose, like, to get some adrenaline going every day. No, no. I was like, I was having a particularly bad day. And I was like, if I just drive quickly for five seconds, I can pop my adrenaline up and get rid of this. I actually did that on purpose, so, and I did that, by the way, on a back street near a school bus stop. No, I'm just kidding. I was I went somewhere that I thought was very safe and kind of out of the way. Well, this is very honest of you. First of all, Kate, if you don't feel like you owe me anything, and you don't give a what anybody else thinks, Why are you telling this story? Because a lot of people say, I come on to tell my story to help other people, but you don't care if you're helping other people. Are you bragging?
Cate 48:16
No, no. And it's like, yeah, no, I don't. I'm trying to think of, what do you get out of this? How to describe it? Does it stroke an ego in a way? Probably, like I would be it's stupid to not think so. Do I think it's important? Probably do. I think it's important because I think I'm important. Likely.
Scott Benner 48:37
Why do you care if it's important? Oh,
Speaker 1 48:39
yeah. So like, that's Yeah, good question,
Scott Benner 48:43
because you don't go around telling people I was on a podcast if you want to listen, right? No, I don't, because you don't care if they like you or not.
Cate 48:50
No, I don't, absolutely not. No, and I like, I'm I do business the same way. I get into a lot of like, I yeah, I get Yeah, because I don't give a I don't care. You're
Scott Benner 49:02
incredibly consistent, yes, yeah, because there's no like, you don't care if Tyler cares. You don't care if I care. You don't care if any. You don't you're not trying to make a faceless person like you like you know, but you're still here. I mean, it's an hour your life. You're telling a lot of intimate things. I'm assuming you don't tell a lot of people this stuff, right? It's not
Cate 49:21
something that you just bring up in like normal conversation. If anyone were to ask me, absolutely, I would tell them, because I have again, because I don't care. I have nothing to hide, right to me, it's, do I think more people should be like me? Yes. Do I think that telling my story can give some permission, not in the sense of them not caring, but telling people so that it's not like it happens to people. I'm also like a huge again, this is where a contradiction will come in. Like, I'm a huge feminist, and so for whatever reason, I have. Of like a like a vigilante, like, type of complex in the sense that I feel like things happen to people that shouldn't, and I think that they deserve justice a lot more than what they've received. And
Scott Benner 50:17
karma is not equally being doled out in the world? Absolutely. And
Cate 50:21
I think anyone who believes it is a liar to themselves, and they need to be truthful.
Scott Benner 50:28
But why do you care about this part so,
Cate 50:30
this part so because, and we haven't barely even talked about it, but the abortion side of things is that women's right to choose or not to choose, I think, is used so much as a political platform, or as a as a religious platform, or as just a way, like a righteous platform, that I think that they're villainized and they shouldn't be villainized. Why do you care? So that this is, that's what I mean, is that that's like the, this is important contradiction, yeah, like that one, you're fired, yeah, absolutely, yeah.
Scott Benner 51:11
Don't give a he looks sad and he just wants to feel my skin touches. He can go, can pound sand, right, right?
Cate 51:20
If anyone around with Tyler, he belongs to me, he's mine. I am like he belongs to me, he's mine, and I will ruin anyone who affects him. That makes sense, because he's think of it as almost like a possession. I don't think of Tyler as a possession, but I also think of Tyler as a possession. So he is, he's mine to protect. And, yeah, so like, but
Scott Benner 51:50
not for his well being, for yours, because you went all, you went to all this trouble. All comes
Cate 51:55
Absolutely, it all so, and that's just, that's just the part of the thing is that it will always come back to me for, like, a selfish reason. Yeah, listen,
Scott Benner 52:03
Kate, here's the high side of this. Anybody who got this far into it who's very pro, like, anti abortion, is, like, you know, it's probably okay that this girl didn't have a baby. So, like, I'm not usually for this, but okay, I'm gonna make an exception here for Cate, yeah, yeah. So you destroy another person for with Tyler, because of all the hard work you put into getting Tyler into your house and keeping him quiet when you don't want to have sex with him, like you got him where you want him now you don't need anybody messing with him, not
Cate 52:35
in like, if they are, and it's not like messing like, like flirting like, I don't mean like that, but like, if they it's hard to hurt him, or if you're mean to him, like, I absolutely will you up. Like, are you mean to him? Make him upset? Probably, he will probably be the first one to say that I'm
Scott Benner 52:54
you make him upset. Likely, yeah, why is it not okay for other
Cate 52:58
people not to think that? Because, because there doesn't need to be logic to it. Scott is because, why is it okay for you? It's not, it's and I don't, I will never, I will never condone any like the way that I am to anyone.
Scott Benner 53:16
Is there no effort to change it?
Cate 53:18
I think so. And I like, again, it's like, I I can see myself change and how I am with Tyler all of the time, and he can too, like how we first were to how we are now is almost night and day. So you
Scott Benner 53:36
just need to live to, like, 197 and you think this is all going to be
Cate 53:40
okay. Uh, hopefully not. No, I also, I will also go before he will, most likely Wait. Why? So I know that he will probably have a really nice life.
Scott Benner 53:49
Why? Why do you think you'll go before him? Outside
Cate 53:53
of stats, I know that women live longer, but I've got, like, a few
Scott Benner 53:58
things going, yeah. How do you find the energy to care about your diabetes?
Cate 54:02
It's a thing that is there that keep like, and if I don't manage it, then it set my life and that you care about is a benefit to me. So if I want to continue to live longer, if I like so during like, a really, not so great patch growing up when we were still trying to figure out what the was going on and what have you absolutely tried to commit suicide a few times, and what have you and absolutely used diabetes as a tool to self harm, because it's, it's it was no longer, it's not useful to me. Like, if I want to die keeping, like, keeping track of it, like keeping it good and good control or whatever is no longer beneficial.
Scott Benner 54:47
I feel like I'm going to take a lot of for this next question, but it feels like the next obvious question,
Unknown Speaker 54:52
yeah,
Scott Benner 54:52
oh God, hold on a second. I don't want to be judged and I don't want emails. Okay, just try to put yourself in my position. Okay? Okay, why is it you want to be alive?
Cate 55:02
Because I still get it like, I still get pleasure from being alive. I still find life very interesting, and I find people as like as I find people very interesting, and I like very interesting, but
Scott Benner 55:17
like subjects. You know, you don't want to be involved subjects, Oh
Cate 55:19
God no, yeah, absolutely like to be studied to the point where, like, Tyler absolutely is, like, you need to stop talking, because really fascinated. Well, no, I but I get really fascinated by stuff and the and if it fascinates me or gets me excited, and I haven't come across this particular situation, I don't really know how to react, so it's kind of like it's not like autism, but it's almost like you don't recognize the social thing that's happening, and you make it extremely awkward and and how you've reacted is not normal. So I do that. So like someone I had started, kind of started reading about Rwanda and, like, the genocide there and what have you. And then I met someone from Rwanda, and I was like, did you grow up during and she's like, Yeah. Like, this is the reason why I came to Canada. And I was like, That's fascinating. That's not something that you tell someone who literally went through a genocide, right? I was like, tell me everything. Like, that's not it's like, oh my gosh. Like, that's right, I'm so sorry. That's what you went through, you know. Like, that must have been horrific. Like, did you, you know, like, hopefully your family's okay. Like, that's usually how you're supposed to respond. Whereas I was like, science experiment, like, amazing. Like, tell me everything, like she's not in real life, yeah, no, absolutely,
Scott Benner 56:44
she's a reporter on something that you found interesting.
Cate 56:47
Absolutely, yeah. And so, like, Tyler is like, Oh, that's not how you do that. That's absolutely not how you go about that conversation. And I was like, oh. And then so he had to, like, teach me how to go through like, a conversation like a normal person. Okay? Yeah, like, and he does it like, we'll go, and it's like, small things as well. We'll go to, like, a craft market around Christmas. You know, people are selling their artisan wares that, you know, they put blood, sweat and tears into, that I don't give a about. And I will absolutely just start being like, I really hate this chain. This is, it looks cheap. It's fine. And like, the person is right, literally right in front of me. Yeah, no, I'm not trying to, I'm I'm stating facts of how I like, this is, this looks cheap, like, and he's like, that's not, you don't do that. Like, that's not what you're supposed to do. I was like, Oh, what am I supposed to do? Let me educate you. This is what you're supposed to do. People
Scott Benner 57:41
might be thinking, Scott got pretty far away from the abortion conversation, but, and here's, here's why, there's nowhere to go with it, because if, if I ask her how she felt like because all my questions were going to be about like, hey, in hindsight, are you sorry you did it like, you know is, did it? Did you have any lingering guilt? I think we know all the answers to all those questions. Well, no, no. Like, wait, no,
Speaker 1 58:07
no. So, like, do I ever think
Scott Benner 58:11
about it? Absolutely, I do. You wonder what the baby might be like?
Unknown Speaker 58:16
Absolutely.
Scott Benner 58:17
Why do you care? What? Jesus? Okay, hold on. I'm sorry, because
Unknown Speaker 58:21
I'm I'm curious. Like, it's like, oh, wait
Scott Benner 58:24
a minute. Are you curious what the baby would be like, or do you miss?
Cate 58:28
I don't know, I but I don't know, right? Like, and there are things that, like, happen in my life, even how I feel about my dogs, I didn't know what was going on or, like, I don't know until I know, right, like, until someone's like, this is what this is. I was like, Oh, okay.
Scott Benner 58:48
Have you ever wondered, What if I would have had that baby and it would have, and it would have changed all these feelings for me, and I would have, would
Cate 58:55
I, yeah, like, would it have changed me with this? Is this the catalyst of me being different. Would I? Would I think about this child as I would my dogs, as I do Tyler, like, we
Scott Benner 59:08
don't want you to think about the baby like, Tyler, but like,
Cate 59:11
but in the in the sense of like, you know, like I went Mama Bear. You know, you always hear mom say that, like, I'll go full on Mama Bear, on them. And like, I do that for Tyler, like, because, you it's this protective instinct. I think that, like, would I have it because I don't care, or would I because it's mine, and it's mine in a completely different way than what Tyler is?
Scott Benner 59:35
Have you ever put somebody else before you? Would you step in front of a bullet for someone,
Unknown Speaker 59:40
if it benefited me, yes, how would
Scott Benner 59:43
it benefit you? You're gonna get shot. It's not gonna benefit you. So like no, but
Cate 59:46
it absolutely can, absolutely can. Would you give your life? Is how you can tell that you are not a manipulative person, so that, like you just think of life very differently than I do. Yeah.
Scott Benner 59:59
Would you give your. Life for someone else?
Cate 1:00:01
Absolutely not. That doesn't benefit me at all. I would be dead. Why would I give my life for somebody? What
Scott Benner 1:00:06
if it was your kid?
Unknown Speaker 1:00:07
I don't know. I
Scott Benner 1:00:09
don't have a child. Tyler, no, I don't know the dog. I don't know. Yeah, probably not, though, right?
Unknown Speaker 1:00:16
I don't know. Yeah, I
Scott Benner 1:00:17
think you'd be like, I think you'd be like, whoops, guys, you're gonna die. Sorry. I
Cate 1:00:21
don't know. I don't know. I genuinely like, I can for like, how I've been like, yes, no, I don't care about you. Like, I can be very blunt and be like, I know this for fact, for those, which is not common in my life, for those I genuinely don't know. I genuinely don't know. Can I tell
Scott Benner 1:00:43
you something I've been thinking about for a half an hour? Yeah, after we have this conversation, I'm going to run it through and turn it into a transcript. I don't usually do that right away. That usually happens, like, long after, like, way down the line and ending. I'm going to put this out as an mp three, turn it into a transcript, feed it into chat, GPT 4.0, and say, What is wrong with Kate?
Speaker 1 1:01:08
Can you share the results with me? I hope it finds me like a very normal person. Can
Scott Benner 1:01:13
I tell you something I'm not sure I'm gonna read it into the end of the recording, like because, and here's why, not, because I think that AI has the answers to everything, but because I think that inside of this conversation, like, you know, when you listen to something like this, and at the end you go, Oh, you know what? Like, she said this, and that means this. And people have all these theories, but people's brains aren't big enough to hold all but chat. GPT can hold everything that you've said and come up with a diagnosis for what's happening to you, yeah? Because even when I asked, like, do you ever think about what the baby might be like, it's not in terms of, like, yeah, I I wonder what it would be like to have an eight year old running around my house that loves me unconditionally, and I love it back unconditionally. You're not thinking about that. You're just thinking again, like, as a researcher, like, Oh, I do wonder what it would be like, but not, not the way other people are thinking about it. And by the way, I don't think that makes you there's some people who are going to hear this and think this woman's a monster. It's just, it's wiring, wiring. No, it's wiring and don't, no, no, it's wiring and chemicals. And it's no different than, like, you couldn't get upset at somebody for not finding red roses, like, pretty like, it's just whatever is all inside of them. They look at a red rose and they go, not the flower for me, right? And then other people see them and think, Oh, those are so gorgeous, and look how silky they are. And blah, blah, I don't think anyone. I just genuinely don't think that people turn into who they are decisively. I think it's so much about, you know, what's inside of you, and literally, the chemicals running around inside of you and and, I mean, just imagine that this little 11 year old girl was running around bipolar, and she took a peptide and her symptoms went away like, like. So there's a world where there's the thing that we could inject into you that would turn things a little more back to what we consider to be normal, where you might suddenly look at Tyler and be like, Oh my god, there you are. Give me a hug. Have you ever considered that that you're not the way you'd want to be if you could be.
Cate 1:03:22
No, because, again, it's one of those, like, my brain doesn't my understand why?
Scott Benner 1:03:29
Yeah, yeah. But have you ever thought? Never, once you've never philosophized about it? No,
Cate 1:03:34
no. My again, my brain, like, doesn't allow it, like it's, it's, automatically gets dismissed like, I can't entertain it because I like, I can't, I can't.
Scott Benner 1:03:46
Do you like me when you listen? Are you just listening because you need it for diabetes the latter? Yeah, you because I might. I probably seem like a pussy to you, right?
Cate 1:03:57
No, no, no, no, no, no, not at all. No, I wouldn't.
Scott Benner 1:04:02
Like, when I start crying in the middle of someone's story, you don't go, Jesus Christ man, tuck your vagina.
Cate 1:04:09
You could probably hear my eye roll from where you are. Yeah, absolutely. Like, somebody
Scott Benner 1:04:13
says something like, thoughtful. Sometimes even I'm like, oh, that made me tear up. Like, that's so nice. And you're probably like, I wouldn't let this guy anywhere near my naked ass. Yeah, right, right. Okay, okay. Do you find me amusing? Yes, you do. Okay,
Cate 1:04:28
well, yeah, I mean, I but like you and I have had laughs during this conversation.
Scott Benner 1:04:32
Oh no, I'm hilarious, but, I mean, I don't know if you, if it's touching you or not, is what I'm
Unknown Speaker 1:04:37
saying. Look, I desired I find you amusing right now.
Scott Benner 1:04:40
So there you go. No, no, no, I'm incredibly funny. That's for certain but only to certain people. But I wasn't certain if you were going to be one of those people or not. And so, like, so you started listening to this because you're like, I need help with my I see people talking about this thing. It helps them with their diabetes. I have diabetes. I'll go use it and make me better.
Speaker 1 1:04:57
That's exactly like that. Is genuinely so I can live
Scott Benner 1:05:02
longer and be unhappy. Yeah, so it
Cate 1:05:05
was like, what? And it wasn't because other people were talking Well, no, I don't think it was that other people were talking about it. I was like, Okay, I really, I've gotten better control over my diabetes, but I want, like, I want to do better,
Scott Benner 1:05:22
like, one more time, yeah, yeah. And then
Cate 1:05:25
so, like, I did a, like, genuinely did a Google search, or, like, looked up on Spotify, because I was like, okay, so podcast, maybe it's something that I can listen to, because I was traveling a lot, and it, like, it literally came up on my pack, on my podcast, and it would have been, I don't even know what the first episode was, well, I'm gonna thank you, but obviously it was, like, it was good and I was okay, so I can continue to do this. So for the most part, like, there are ones where I can't be bothered to listen when you're doing, like, interviews that I really enjoy. The ones that like, like the Pro Series, or, like, the really interesting ones. I listen to the one, yeah, and I'll listen to the one between you and Arden that's coming up, because that's fascinating to me. Like, what she doesn't know, and how you how you guys, like, talk about it and how she starts to understand it, how the how that works. I find that fascinating, so I
Scott Benner 1:06:27
bet you would, yeah, you should see the list she's making. Sometimes it just says, like, I'm like, just write down everything you don't understand. She goes, Okay, money and I'm like, All right,
Unknown Speaker 1:06:37
yes, yeah, yes, art, and why
Scott Benner 1:06:40
is there a two party system in President, in politics? And I'm like, write it down. She's got such a list you should It's fast. It's gonna be great. And by the way, concurrently, I'm also doing one with Jenny, but it's more about diabetes.
Cate 1:06:53
Yeah. See, I love Jenny, so, like, I love when you guys get together. Like, I love that, but
Scott Benner 1:06:59
you love it for you, you don't go, Scott's really shining here. We should send him a
Speaker 1 1:07:03
cookie, yeah, but I think you shine better with Jenny about diabetes. I think because,
Cate 1:07:10
like, there's even just comment, like, even just the offhand commentary, or, like, even just how we know each other, talking about things with Arden and stuff like that. Like, I just like the two of you together, that conversation about anything I really enjoy. I really enjoy that I don't like, whether it's chemistry or, you know, it's just knowing each other and being together, you know, experience. It's just, I think you shine better with with Jenny in your series, so
Scott Benner 1:07:42
I appreciate that. I would, I mean, now I'm telling you I appreciate I'm like, What am I wasting my time telling her I appreciate it for but let me thank you, even though I don't imagine this is going to touch you at all, but you've just unburdened me in a significant way. Okay? Because if you could try to imagine, like this thing that I do, there are people who absolutely love me. There are people who hate me. There are people who think I'm hurting people. There are people who think I'm helping people. There are people who think I'm saving people. Like the gamut of what people who can hear my voice think of me is amazing. None of them are 100% right, by the way. Like they don't really know they don't actually know me. They know this bit of me, right, which is, fair enough, is a lot of me. I really don't hold anything back while I'm talking, but I also don't go into like, if we would have talked more, if this conversation about abortion would have went a different way. I would have told you that I think that politically, I'm pro choice, but I also think that if you think that having an abortion is not killing something, I think you're lying to yourself. I see this thing very down the middle, yeah, and I could argue either side of it. But I also think that might be my personality to some degree too, where I really do value trying not to take a stand one way or the other, and because I'm interested by the conversation. I'm just actually interested, and I care about the people you're interested, and you're like, well, they're secondary to this, yeah, yeah, and so, but anyway, you've unburdened me, because I am never again going to spend five seconds wondering what people think of me. No, you shouldn't, and I'll tell you why, because, in a million No, no, I listen. I don't care what people think of me. If I did, I wouldn't be doing this. Anybody who does this wouldn't be that impacted by I hope that people hear me and know that I'm I'm being sincere and that I really do want to help people and, you know, like, like, all that stuff, like, I hope they hear that. If they don't, there's nothing I can do about it. And I guess in that I don't care what they think of me, that's not why I'm thanking you. I'm thanking you because in a million fcking years, if you told me to write down how everyone intersects with you, Scott, when they listen to your podcast, you. Your answer never would have come up. And now I know that this answer is a real answer. I got to stop wondering what the rest of them are, because I'm never going to figure it out. So I am now done. I will never again wonder what people think of me or why they think it I had a person recently in a public setting stand up in front of people and bad mouth me in front a ton of people, and really just baseless stuff. They don't know me. They purport to they don't. This is not uncommon in my life, by the way, for people to run around pretending to know me and telling people things about me that are just not, not only they're not true, they've literally never met me before. And while, yeah, it's not a, I mean, making a podcast seems fun and but, but, like, so that happens. There's also, right now, someone standing in a Costco grabbing someone with a CGM going, you have to listen to Juicebox podcast that saved my life. So, like, you take the good, you take the bad, you take them both. Then you've got tutti and and Joe, and what was everyone else's name on the facts of life. 2d, Joe, Mrs. Garrett. Look at me. George Clooney was on there, but I don't know his name. There was the girl that rode the motors. That was Joe. I don't know anybody.
Unknown Speaker 1:11:10
I don't know I feel like it's probably way before my time.
Scott Benner 1:11:13
Oh yeah, you're young. You never watched the facts of life.
Unknown Speaker 1:11:16
No. Oh my goodness,
Scott Benner 1:11:18
a young George Clooney showed up later in episodes. Not the point. What a handsome man. Still, I
Speaker 1 1:11:24
find the older George Clooney much more attractive, as do
Scott Benner 1:11:28
I, although I'm straight and I'm not interested in having sex with him, but I do think he's getting better looking as he
Unknown Speaker 1:11:33
ages. He ages very well,
Scott Benner 1:11:35
absolutely. Should all hope for it now, not the point. Like Tom Selleck, sorry, no problem at all. You don't look at you there, there was, there was warmth in your voice there, yeah,
Cate 1:11:45
not felt, but yeah, no, because I interrupted you. So I know that you're supposed to apologize, but it's fine. I
Scott Benner 1:11:50
was gonna ask a different question. If Tom Selleck showed up right now and he's like, Yo, give me a roll, you'd be, yeah, or you'd be like, not only to touch on me, absolutely. Oh, Tyler. I'm so sorry. Okay,
Cate 1:12:00
Tyler knows like, like, Tom Selleck came out with a book in the last few months, whenever it was and like it was, like a full on, like I was describing the porn that I would have with Tom Selleck to Tyler in front of his book in a very public setting. So Tyler knows why
Scott Benner 1:12:19
that guy if Tom oko, hold on. Forget all that question. What if Tom Selleck dies? How are you going to feel? No way. Probably
Cate 1:12:26
the same. No, probably the same. Like, it would probably be like, well, there goes an attractive man, and then carry on with my life. I
Scott Benner 1:12:34
Yeah. I would think when they put Tom Selleck in the ground, the last thing to dissolve will be that mustache. I bet you it holds up to the very end. I bet she's a skeleton with a
Cate 1:12:42
it's better like we better see like when the if there is a zombie anything, I hope he's just a skeleton
Scott Benner 1:12:49
with his with a fucking absolutely listen how he
Cate 1:12:55
was never a firefighter. I have no idea. But before you let me go, because I know that this is getting long, I do want to say, I also want to confirm your views on abortion is actually how I think it should be. Okay?
Scott Benner 1:13:09
Well, great. Now you agree with me. Now everybody's definitely going to hate me, no,
Cate 1:13:13
but like, I that's what it's supposed to be that. But that is what pro choice is, right? It, it's at the end of the day, it's so that you should a woman should have autonomy over her own body. It should be her choice. Should you still feel like you're potentially killing something or that you you would want that life to continue and not be aborted? Absolutely, absolutely. But at the end of the day, should it be down to the woman's choice and whether or not that that happens? Absolutely that like that is the point. Nothing
Scott Benner 1:13:48
is as black and white as we would hope for the for it to be, so, whether it's abortion or something else, if you're taking a, if you're taking a black or white side on a, on a, on a topic, that's obviously more great multi dimensional than you're trying to make it out to be. You are. I don't care if it's politics or an argument between two people, or it's the idea about abortion or, you know, electric cars and gas cars, or anywhere in between, if you're taking a steadfast position on a multi faceted idea, as if it's not a multifaceted idea, you are willfully ignoring some aspects of the conversation, correct? Yeah. And so if you're pro choice or pro life, you are ignoring something. And I think an abortion, a pro choice person is is probably having to ignore the fact that I am ending a life. And a pro life person is ignoring the fact that not for nothing, Cayton, and I don't even mean this poorly, but even if I did, you wouldn't give a a person like you probably shouldn't have a baby. No, right? So there we go. Or
Cate 1:14:54
like a person in in poverty who can barely feed themselves probably shouldn't. Have a child, either might not
Scott Benner 1:15:01
be a good time to bring a life into the world.
Cate 1:15:02
You know what I mean? Like, and it sucks. It happens like, it sucks. And you shouldn't have that against you, that bit
Scott Benner 1:15:11
right there, right? Like, using that as an example, if I was a person in poverty and I had no way out, if I make a baby, it's going to blah, blah, blah. Like you can, you can see the, the possible trajectory. Now another person will come in and say, Well, you never know that baby could end up finding the cure for cancer or blah and and also, that's not unreal either. That's also true. And the point is, is that nothing's as simple as yes or no, and that's all, like, I know you got to pick a side because it feels like you need to pick a side because I don't know. That seems to be how we're all wired. Be on it. Be on a team, you know what I mean. But like, once you're on the team, you know what I mean, like, if you love the Baltimore Ravens, God bless you, but Ray Lewis might have killed that guy outside of the bar, you know what I mean. Like, also, I'd like to say I don't think Ray Lewis has ever murdered anybody, and I don't know anything, and I am certainly not. This is for entertainment purposes only, but, like, but stuff, but stuff that you've heard in the world where you're like, I don't know. I'm gonna choose to ignore that. Actually, you brought up Michael Jackson earlier. Let me tell you something. When I put on a Michael Jackson song, I willfully forget that he probably diddled those kids absolutely
Unknown Speaker 1:16:24
he's got snappy songs.
Speaker 2 1:16:26
God damn, some of those songs, some of those songs are so good. And I've heard, by the way, that Eric Clapton said some weird stuff. I literally didn't look into it because I don't want to ruin cream. Okay. Like,
Scott Benner 1:16:41
is he Canadian too, by the way, Clapton, you know, no,
Speaker 1 1:16:44
you know. I actually, I don't think so, but I honestly don't know. But I'm being serious.
Scott Benner 1:16:49
I know there's like, I know that somewhere in the world there's conversations that Eric Clapton has said or done something that one side of a political argument wouldn't like. I genuinely do not know what it is, and would never look into it, because cream was an awesome band, and I don't want it ruined for me. Okay, he's
Unknown Speaker 1:17:08
from the UK, by
Scott Benner 1:17:10
the way. Oh, you're right, yeah.
Unknown Speaker 1:17:12
Google is right, yeah.
Speaker 2 1:17:14
Do you see what I'm saying? Like, there's, that's me going, don't tell me all the facts, because I you know Michael Jackson is that's, yeah, I mean, I mean, honestly, what's that smooth, criminal, what a song. You know what? I mean, fantastic. I
Cate 1:17:30
I know it's like, it's on my baseball playlist. It's, it's a fantastic song. It's a great walk up song as well.
Scott Benner 1:17:37
There's no doubt my point is this, I don't care if it's abortion or whatever it is you want to talk about. It's it's not black and white, and we're all ignoring something to come to our own decisions. And that's not for nothing. I do think and be
Cate 1:17:51
able to live with them, like, at the end of the day, that's really what it is. And are
Scott Benner 1:17:55
you okay? Like, do you feel okay with your decision? I
Cate 1:17:57
know it was the right decision, but do I still have like, those lingering thoughts? Are they involved for more what I deprived Tyler of? Yes, like, absolutely, that you care about, but I know that it was the right decision, like I would if I had to do it again, I would do it again. I would never not do
Scott Benner 1:18:21
it. My last question, do you think you're mentally ill? Yes,
Cate 1:18:25
because it's, it's literally diagnosed on paper. So I mean, if you're like, actually looking at the thing, it would say that I had a mental illness, and it's called any social like, that would be there. So factually, yes. Do I think that we're all mentally ill in some way, shape or form? I yeah, I do. I do. I just think I'm a little bit more outside
Scott Benner 1:18:51
of what we expect and what we hope for, yeah, and
Cate 1:18:55
and I am more forthcoming with the information, whereas other people may find it taboo. I'm just more forthcoming with a conversation, so people find it more fascinating and more like a mental illness. But I don't know. I don't know
Scott Benner 1:19:09
if your doctor calls you tomorrow and says, Hey, Kate, found a pill going to make you feel like everybody else. No side effects. It's magic. You take it.
Cate 1:19:18
I would take it yes, because I've been on antidepressants before. I've been on medication before, that changes. That changes the way that your diseases, right? That you can say the same thing for Crohn's, like, it's, I was on an immunosuppressant. I have Crohn's. I was on an immunosuppressant completely. Was like, I didn't have Crohn's, right? So, like, I know what that is. But then you also have to consider that whilst there may not be any side effects in this perfect scenario, you are changing who you are, right? You're not technically genuine. Anymore, or
Scott Benner 1:20:00
is the Crohn's changing you and you're just putting it back? I'm
Cate 1:20:04
not, I'm not on immunosuppression anymore.
Scott Benner 1:20:07
My point is, if the medication is changing who you are, isn't it possible you already changed, and the medications putting you back to who you should have been, because insulin is doing that, right? Yeah,
Cate 1:20:17
yeah. With a lot of stuff to it. I suppose you could argue it in that. Do you know
Scott Benner 1:20:24
what this episode is going to be called, Kate, what the after dark? I'm going to call it after dark more Kate.
Cate 1:20:34
It's an interesting way to think. I, to be fair, I never thought about that on insulin. So that's probably going to be the nugget in my head for the rest of the day. You very much, Scott. But whatever is
Scott Benner 1:20:43
it okay with you if I do what I said about chat, G, P, T, and read it into the end, because you won't be able to hear it. Okay? I just realized I'm gonna pull up Arden's note or Arden's, um, I don't understand list because I've been writing stuff on the I don't understand list two, and I am this is people are not gonna like me, but I don't understand gaslighting like you don't. It feels weird to me that people think that you can say something to them that gaslights them. Oh, but that you're okay with you believe in gaslighting.
Cate 1:21:12
Quickly explain to me what gaslighting is. Again, no, okay, yeah, okay, never mind like, Oh, he's gaslighting me. Oh, so, so isn't it, when they're you're like, You're cheating on me, and you're like, No, I'm not like, I was right, doing blah, blah, blah, that's being gaslighted.
Scott Benner 1:21:29
Isn't it that feels like lying to me. Did it need a new word? Is
Cate 1:21:32
that not light? Yeah. Is it not lying? I
Scott Benner 1:21:35
put it on my list. Wait,
Unknown Speaker 1:21:37
wait on your list. Yeah.
Scott Benner 1:21:38
I don't understand a lot of things. Where do you figure out all the I don't understand so much.
Unknown Speaker 1:21:45
I'm excited for Arden, yeah, oh, she's
Scott Benner 1:21:47
gonna be great. We're gonna do an entire, like, big series. And I told her, if people seem interested in it, I'll spin it off into its own podcast, absolutely.
Cate 1:21:55
Because, like, those are the things I find that really fascinating, too. That, like, I don't have a dad, YouTube pinging the fingers, or, like, I don't have a mom. And so it's these people that are like, Hey, this is how you change a tire. And I like, and how people talk in the comments is so fascinating to me. Yeah, like, they're like, and I like, I don't like my dad passed. So, like, I get it, I don't know how to look at foundation issues, like which I learned without them. I don't think if I learned it off a YouTube channel that I would be like super I would be leaving an emotional comment, obviously. So I find it interesting when people get really emotionally invested in in these, in these things that they don't know about and that they've learned I don't know. I think it's neat.
Scott Benner 1:22:40
I swear to God, this, this list is fascinating. It's like, I don't understand money, life insurance, fingernails, I don't fingernails. People who create something from nothing. What do blind people see? Why aren't there more car accidents? How come more asteroids don't hit the planet? Who decided this one, I thought was fascinating. Who decided when the first Monday was going to happen? It's
Unknown Speaker 1:23:03
true, a man did. And I was
Scott Benner 1:23:05
like, he
Speaker 1 1:23:06
also did a 31 day calendar. It was a man. It wasn't a woman. You can tell her that
Scott Benner 1:23:11
my son jumped in. Where does the gas at the gas station come from?
Cate 1:23:15
And why does it change prices five times a day? Tell him that he should put that on his list.
Scott Benner 1:23:21
Well, that's, that's economics, but he and so economics, I don't understand that at all, but, but he really meant, is it piped from somewhere, or is that there a tank in the ground? Like he didn't know. And here's one thing that my kids, I guarantee you, to save their own life, could not explain. Wi Fi,
Speaker 1 1:23:38
oh, so that's my business. That's interesting, fascinating. They
Scott Benner 1:23:42
for love or money. Couldn't tell you what Wi Fi is and how it works. They know what it does. They know why it's important to them. They do not know functionally, how it works. So anyway, those are some of the conversations, really, yeah, it's gonna be great.
Cate 1:23:55
So I would have thought that they would have known what, out of all the subjects that things like that they would know.
Scott Benner 1:24:02
No, they're like little morons. I can't wait to do this. It's gonna be fantastic. And being serious, I think it really highlights all the things that we expect, that other people know, that they have no idea about. But we run around. We run around projecting our own knowledge onto others all the time. Absolutely,
Unknown Speaker 1:24:20
absolutely, yeah, yes, yep.
Scott Benner 1:24:22
I will tell you that I used to think that I couldn't be successful at something, because if it was a thing that people were successful at, someone would be better at it than me like so why would I bother? There's obviously someone out there doing it better, and yet I made this thing. And generally speaking, nobody's knocked me off of this thing,
Cate 1:24:43
this thing. So do you have? Do you suffer from imposter syndrome? Then?
Scott Benner 1:24:47
No, I'm pretty confident. Now my ego is quite but when I was younger, when I was younger, I just assumed that if it was worth doing, someone had already. Done it better than I was going to do it. Okay, yeah, so, but now I know where I'm at, but I also have metrics and and feedback. Okay,
Cate 1:25:09
so it's, it's you don't have imposter syndrome, because the facts or your metrics prove that you shouldn't be an imposter that you are doing the thing the next
Scott Benner 1:25:19
closest diabetes podcast, to me, is a hobby at best, by downloads. And I'm sure they're doing really well, and they're probably great people, and like, I don't have anything against them. I'm just telling you that the amount of downloads that I do in a month versus what the next closest one does, I make them look like they don't have a podcast. Okay, you know what I'm saying. And so I confident. So there's confidence. It breathes with
Speaker 1 1:25:42
that. Yes, yeah, of course, are you, like, brushing your shoulders off? No, no,
Scott Benner 1:25:47
no, not at all. Like, I just, it's how it goes. Because, again, it's not black and white. There's 1000 things about me, and this thing I'm doing that put the podcast where it's at right, like, I listen. There's no one else. I'm just gonna go out on a limb here and tell you you are never again in the history of your life. Going to turn on a podcast that says it's about diabetes and have a type one come on and talk about their feelings about abortion. It ain't happening. So these,
Unknown Speaker 1:26:15
to be fair, we didn't even really talk
Scott Benner 1:26:17
about no we everyone knows how you feel, trust me. We got that all out completely. I just didn't want to spend 45 minutes asking you questions where you're like, No, don't care. Yeah, trust me. The way the conversation went was, I thought, bolstered the topic more than picking through the topic would have okay, if that makes sense. Anyway, cool. Thank you for doing this. I really appreciate it. Don't even bother answering. I know you don't.
Speaker 1 1:26:50
Yeah, of course. Thanks. All right,
Scott Benner 1:26:53
hold on a second. All right, guys, it's later in the day, and I did exactly what I said I was going to do. I took the transcript of that exact conversation, I put it into chat. GPT four, oh, and I gave it this instruction. Read this podcast episode transcript, read it completely. The guest is named Cate. I want you to ignore her diagnosis of herself and listen to her describe her personality, then make a psychological assessment of her based on Kate's description of her personality, behaviors and emotions. Here is a psychological assessment of Kate lack of empathy. Kate consistently mentions that she does not feel empathy for others, even for those close to her, like her husband. This is a significant trait in understanding her psychological profile, impulsivity. Kate describes herself as highly impulsive, engaging in dangerous or risky behaviors for the thrill or sensation they provide. This is typical of impulsivity often seen in certain personality disorders, manipulative tendencies. Cate admits to being manipulative, indicating a strategic approach to interpersonal interactions, where she prioritizes, prioritizes her own needs and benefits over others, lack of consideration for consequence, Kate mentions not thinking about the consequences of her actions, which ties into her impulsivity and her sense of, excuse me, invulnerable, in vulnerability or optimism bias, deficient emotional responses. Kate describes her emotional responses as largely learned behaviors rather than genuine feelings. She mimics appropriate social reactions rather than feeling them authentically. Egocentric outlook. Kate often relates everything back to herself and her own experiences, showing a self centered perspective that underlies her interactions and decisions interesting, excuse me, interest in taboo topics. Cate is drawn to discussing taboo topics and finds it and finds pleasure in making people uncomfortable. This could be indicative of a desire to challenge social norms or an attempt to connect through shock value. Now here's the psychological assessment, anti social personality disorder, ASPD. Case, lack of empathy, impulsivity, manipulativeness and disregard for social norms strongly suggest traits associated with ASPD. This disorder is characterized by a pervasive pattern of disregard for the rights of others, often manifesting in deceitful, manipulative and exploitive behaviors. Optimism bias. Kate exhibits a cognitive bias where she believes negative outcomes are less likely to happen to her. This contributes to her risk taking behavior and lack of concern for her consequences. Emotional detachment. Kate shows signs of emotional detachment where she is intellectually understanding, excuse me, where she intellectually understands emotions but does not experience them in a typical manner. This detachment can lead to difficulties in forming deep emotional bonds and maintaining long term relationships. Impacts on a relationship. Kate's relationship with her husband is. Complex. She acknowledges a different type of affection for her dogs than for her husband, and her interactions with him are often more transactional than emotional. Kate's lack of empathy and manipulative tendencies likely make social interactions challenging. She relies on learned behaviors to navigate social situations which can be perceived as insincere by others. Her personality profile suggests a significant presence of traits associated with anti social personality disorder marked by a lack of empathy, impulsivity, manipulativeness and a self centered approach to life. Her emotional detachment and reliance on learned social behaviors further complicate her interactions and relationships. Understanding these traits can help in developing strategies for managing her behaviors, improving her interpersonal relationships. Now, I didn't ask it this, but I'm thinking this right now, is her personality
Unknown Speaker 1:30:51
indicative
Scott Benner 1:30:54
of a specific trauma? What do you think kids a chance that something leads to something more often than not, they don't directly point to a specific trauma, but rather suggest a complex interplay of various factors, lack of empathy. A significant lack of empathy can sometimes result from early childhood experiences including neglect or emotional depredation, deprivation. However, Kate did not explicitly mention that impulsivity and risk taking, these traits can be linked to both genetic factors and environmental influences, while trauma, especially during formative years, can lead to increased impulsivity and risk taking behaviors as a coping mechanism. Kate does not provide clear evidence of a specific trauma cut event. It's very clear to make sure that it's it tells you like I'm guessing at this, manipulations as a defense mechanism can arise from environments where individuals learn to prioritize their own needs in response to unstable or unsafe surroundings. Trauma might contribute to this, but Kate did not indicate a history of manipulative behavior stemming from trauma. An emotional detachment can develop as a proactive response to trauma, particularly if an individual experiences overwhelming emotions they cannot process. Her description of her lack of genuine emotional response could suggest some form of emotional trauma, but again, she did not explicitly connect this to a specific event. Here it gives us Kate's own words on trauma. It says she mentions having trauma, but does not specifically, but not specific incidents that align directly with her personality traits. And Kate's own self diagnosis leans towards ASPD, which can develop due to a mix of genetic predisposition and environmental factors, including trauma. That's something nature versus nurture. Kate's anti social tendencies and lack of empathy could be influenced by genetic factors, while she does not specifically direct, specifically direct trauma, the development of her personality could be influenced by broader environmental factors, including potentially traumatic experiences, if she may not explicitly recognize or articulate them. Okay? Is there any data
Unknown Speaker 1:33:06
that indicates
Scott Benner 1:33:08
a GLP medication could help her? This is interesting, then I'm done. GLP medications, commonly used for diabetes management, have shown some interesting effects on mental health beyond their primary purpose. However, the data on their impact or personality traits or conditions like those described by Cadiz limited, here's a breakdown of what is known GLP medications. Some studies have indicated GLP medication, GLP one medication, might have a positive impact on mood disorders such as depression, anxiety. This could be due to the influence of GLP on the neuro inflammation, neuro inflammation and neuro plasticity. There have been anecdotal reports of some preliminary search research suggesting GLP medications might help with certain aspects of bipolar disorder. I mentioned that episode during this is what made me ask this, and then research is ongoing into the cognitive and behavioral effects of GLP one. There are indications that these medications might influence brain fluctuation functions related to reward, appetite and possibly even impulse control. There is no direct evidence or clinical trial data suggesting that a GLP one medication could treat ASPD. ASPD is primarily treated through psychotherapy, which medications sometimes use to address specific symptoms like aggression or CO occurring conditions such as depression or anxiety. Anyway, chat, G, P, T, baby, you can have a good conversation with it.
Oh, a huge thanks to us med for sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox podcast. Don't forget us, med.com/juicebox, this is where we get our diabetes supplies from. You can as well use the link or call 888, 87211514, use the link or call the number. Get your free benefits check so that you can start getting your diabetes supplies the way we do from us. Med, a huge thank you to one of today's sponsors, G VO, glucagon. Find out more about G vo hypo pen at G VO, glucagon.com, forward slash juice box. You spell that, G, V, O, k, e, g, l, U, C, A, G, o, n.com, forward slash juice box if you're living with type one diabetes, the after dark collection from the Juicebox podcast is the only place to hear the stories that no one else talks about, from drugs to depression, self harm, trauma, addiction and so much more, go to Juicebox podcast.com up in the menu and click on after dark there, you'll see a full list of all of the after dark episodes. I can't thank you enough for listening. Please make sure you're subscribed or following in your audio app. I'll be back tomorrow with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. Hey, what's up, everybody? If you've noticed that the podcast sounds better and you're thinking like, how does that happen? What you're hearing is Rob at wrong way recording doing his magic to these files. So if you want him to do his magic to you wrong way recording.com you got a podcast. You want somebody to edit it? You want rob you?
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#1370 Thanksgiving Insulin Strategies
A turkey tutorial in under 20 minutes. Simple tools to make today more enjoyable.
You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio - Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.
+ Click for EPISODE TRANSCRIPT
DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.
Scott Benner 0:00
We are all together again, friends for the next episode of The Juicebox podcast.
Today's episode is quick and to the point it's called Turkey tutorial. This episode is a mainstay on the podcast. If you're new to the show, you might not know it. If you've heard it before, you're in for a treat, because the audio has been completely Remastered. This episode first dropped on November 21 2017 what you're getting is a quick kind of it's a pep talk, and it's a pep talk for HAL to Bolus on a day full of food. I put it up around Thanksgiving for obvious reasons, but the truth is, what you hear inside will work for you every day. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan. When you place your first order for ag one, with my link, you'll get five free travel packs and a free year supply of vitamin D drink. Ag one.com/juice, box, if you're looking for community around type one diabetes, check out the Juicebox podcast. Private Facebook group Juicebox podcast, type one diabetes, but everybody is welcome. Type one, type two, gestational love. This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the contour next gen blood glucose meter. Learn more and get started today at contour. Next.com/juicebox next.com/juicebox Did you know if just one person in your family has type one diabetes, you're up to 15 times more likely to get it too. So screen it like you mean it one blood test can spot type one diabetes early. Tap now talk to a doctor or visit screen for type one.com, for more info. Just going to go through a couple of ideas, talk about them very briefly, and then I'm gone. You ready? Let's jump right in. When I'm making insulin decisions for Arden, I have a bunch of tenants, just some basic concepts that I consider each time. So I'm going to mention one, and then I'm going to talk about it for a little bit. Here's the bit. Here's the first one. Do you find yourself of being accepting of high glucose levels higher than you want them to be because you're afraid of the insulin? I understand if that's how you feel, but you need to get over that. You have to get past that part until you dispense with your fear and stop looking at a 200 and going well, 200 is not bad. 150 is not too bad. At least it's not 250 until you can stop doing that in your own head, it's going to be difficult to move on. So you have to dispense with the fear. Fear and diabetes do not go hand in hand, unless you let them. Insulin is like fire in as much as it should be respected, but not feared. It's a simple concept. Sometimes it's hard to bring into practice. Don't be afraid. Be bold. You'd much rather have a lower blood sugar to deal with than a higher blood sugar to deal with, especially on Thanksgiving. I mean, wouldn't you rather have a 60 than a 260 right? Wouldn't you rather be fighting with a 70 diagonal down that might need a little more food, especially on a day when there's so much food around the house anyway, than a 270 diagonal up. You don't want to be fighting with a 300 that's sort of how a day like Thanksgiving gets ruined. You get a blood sugar up. And now the anxiety, the guilt and the insulin you're bolusing, eventually you crack the 300 all of a sudden it's crashing down. You'd much rather just overdo it a little bit with insulin, and then just have to stop a little bit of a low. The next thing you need to consider is action time. How long does your insulin take to begin working, and how does that affect your blood glucose? You need to understand that you're never going to be able to balance the insulin and the carbs together if you don't understand how the insulin works, when the insulin goes in, how long until it starts moving my blood sugar? This is incredibly important to understand, and very easy to figure out, whatever your blood sugar is, right now, if it's 150 and you haven't had insulin for a few hours, give yourself some insulin. When do you see it start to move? Do a little testing, little trial and error. Figure it out. Once you understand how long it takes for the insulin to begin working, that is a key building block for the rest of what you're going to do. Okay, next big thing, big part. Here we go. When your blood glucose levels are high, you've likely mistimed miscalculated, or a combination of the both your insulin exactly the same. If your blood sugar is low, you have mistimed miscalculated or possibly a combination of those two. You've lost the balance between carbs and insulin. But there's no great secret about why your blood sugar is high. We sometimes can get caught up in the whys, like, is it because of my pump is old, or maybe my insulin is too old? You see people all the time going. Through all the myriad of things, why is my kid's blood sugar 250 I can't figure it out. Here's why you don't have enough insulin. The reason you don't have enough insulin really isn't important in the moment, more insulin. It's something to understand in a bigger way, because it has applications throughout diabetes. If your blood sugar is high, you haven't used enough insulin, and if your blood sugar is low, you've used too much insulin. Now maybe that's a balance between the timing and the amount, but still, it's a basic concept that will hold true over and over again. Here's a simple rule of thumb I use all the time. It cannot be overstated. Trust yourself and what your experiences with diabetes have taught you. It's very simple. It's a convoluted sentence that makes the point, you have to believe that what you know is going to happen is going to happen. If I Bolus this much, I know this is going to happen if he eats that but I don't give him insulin until he's done. I know this is going to happen. You have to trust that you know what's going to happen is going to happen, and then you need to do something to stop it from happening. Here's another one that's very important, especially on Thanksgiving. Don't confuse carb counting with carb understanding, because not all carbs are created equal. You can't just say, well, that's 30 carbs. It's going to do this. It needs this much insulin. That's not true. 30 carbs of one food may affect your blood sugar much differently than 30 carbs of another food. It is much better for you to look and say that's two slices of bread. I know when two slices of bread are consumed, it requires this much insulin. Forget that two slices of bread or five carbs less if it's that kind of bread, or five carbs more for that kind of bread. How much insulin is it going to take for those slices of bread? When you look at a pile of stuffing, how many pieces of bread are there? How much insulin is that going to take? Don't worry about the count or the amount or the weight. Worry about what you know, what happened last time when I ate the sandwich. How much insulin did it take? Let's say I looked at a food and I thought, I can't lower my carbs. I said, that's five units of insulin. Then I gave the five units of insulin. I did a reasonable pre Bolus, and still, my blood sugar ended up at 250 and I had to do three more units to bring it back down to where I wanted it well, if it took five units up front and three units to bring it back, you probably needed eight units of insulin. Give it all up front, get rid of the spike. If you really time the pre bowl as well, we're going to talk about pre bolusing in a minute, but if you really time that pre bowl as well, maybe you don't need the full eight. Maybe it's only seven. These numbers are specious. They're not specific to you, but you need to figure that part out. I used this much then this happened, so I needed this much more. I probably needed that whole amount up front. That's the rule. I can tell you, that I Bolus the amount that I think is correct. I really never count carbs. I never worry about what my insulin to carb ratios Tell me. I worry about what I historically know that food is going to require same thing with the high blood sugar. I see a high blood sugar that's stuck and I need to Bolus for it. I don't worry about what the pump says. I worry about what works. Okay, basal rates. For those of you who are pumping, if you find yourself bolusing all the time, your basal rates are probably not correct. You should not need to Bolus just to keep a blood sugar where you want it. Don't be afraid to adjust your basal rates even temporarily. Let's use Thanksgiving as an example. If there's going to be more food, the food is going to be more consistent than usual on Thanksgiving, increase your basal by how much. I don't know. I can't tell you. You can figure that out, but I can tell you that when I make adjustments to Arden's basal rates, I usually move them 30% of the time when she has a growth spurt, I'm starting to Bolus too much to keep blood sugars where I want them, and I raise their basal rate. I raise it by 30% see what happens. So you can use temporary basal on days where you're going to be really food heavy. I think on Thanksgiving, I'm going to talk about what our day is going to be like at the end, but I'm going to start setting temp basal for Arden right away in the morning. Imagine type one diabetes is all about understanding the limitations of man made insulin, having the nerve to be bold when you're using it, and most importantly, acting first when you wait for diabetes to attack you, you will always be on the defense. Act. Don't react. I'd rather Bolus and have something happen, then at least I can say, Okay, I did this, and that happened. Next time I'll do this, it brings up a very simple formula for diabetes. It's the it's the E equals MC squared of the Juicebox. Podcast, I Bolus to half a unit, the blood sugar moved 40 points. I wanted it to move 80 points. So next time I'll Bolus a unit. I Bolus 10 units, but my blood sugar still went up to 150
maybe next time I'll do this much. I did this. This happened. I wanted this to happen. Next time I'll do this, the E equals MC squared of the Juicebox podcast. Okay, let's talk about pre bolusing and the tug of war. More of the carbs in the insulin. I want you to picture a tug of war between the carbohydrates and your insulin. In the middle of the rope is a flag. Now, unlike most tug of wars, the goal isn't for one side to win. The goal is for both sides to pull and the flag to never move from the center. That is the balance of your blood sugar that flag. If you start eating when your blood sugar is 180 you're going to be high. There's not a lot you can do about it, unless you're incredibly aggressive with insulin at the time, and that's maybe hard for some of you to do. So give yourself a chance at these meals and pre Bolus. Now I can't tell you how much of a pre Bolus is, right, but we did talk earlier about understanding how your insulin works. Get that understanding of yourself. Can I give myself insulin 15 minutes before I eat? Can I give it to myself 10 minutes? 20 minutes? It differs for everybody. But what you want to happen when the food starts affecting your body, you need the insulin to already be working so that while the carbs are pulling up on your blood sugar, the insulin is pulling down, and they're fighting and they're pulling on that tug of war rope, but they're not winning. No one's winning because no one got a head start. You give one of them a head start, that's going to be the side that wins. If the carbs pull first, then they're always going to be winning, and you're going to have a hard time to get back into that game, unless you add so much insulin that eventually you'll all go crashing the other way. You don't want that. If the insulin pulls too soon, before the carbs start working, you're going to get really low. And you don't want that either. You want the insulin and the carbohydrates to pull at the same time. And the most important thing is they need to stop pulling at the same time. A low after a meal just means that you had insulin left in your body after the carbs were gone. A high after a meal means you had carbs left in your body after the insulin was gone. It's all about the timing. Remember what I said? If your blood sugar is high, you've either miscalculated or mistimed. And if your blood sugar is low, you've either miscalculated or you've mistimed. A significant pre Bolus, one that allows the insulin to be working when the food starts working is key. If you want to stop a spike at a meal time, that's it. Now, if you didn't stop the spike, don't just wave your hands and go, Oh, I got it wrong. You see a blood sugar that's going up, attack it, especially if you have a Dexcom CGM stop the arrow. But I mean, with a big, carb heavy meal like this, your kid eats test again and a half an hour see where you're at. If you're 200 a half an hour after meal, you miscalculated or missed time. You may need more insulin. How much more is up to you, but you want to stop that rise and get it back where you want it without over treating. And that is really one of the last points you can't over treat. You can't over treat a low. You can't panic and pack in the whole refrigerator for a low, and you can't panic and pack in too much insulin for a high, or you will be up and down all day long. It's about bumping and nudging your blood sugar. If you have a Dexcom, think of that line on your CGM graph as something you're just trying to nudge, just up and down like a little video game, just trying not to leave the lines. And if you're testing and you don't have a CGM test frequently, and bump and nudge and bump and nudge, keep pushing that blood sugar back to where you want and expect good things for yourself. Set a goal for yourself of around 100 of around 80, of around 90, because often you get what you expect, especially with a CGM, please move your tolerance lines to a lower spot. You don't want a high tolerance on your CGM of 200 it's too late by then, put it at 130 react up front. Remember what we said? You're either going to attack or be attacked. You would much rather act first. So see a 130 diagonal up, bump it with a little bit of insulin. See a 70 diagonal down bump it with a tiny bit of carbs, or maybe you could even stop a 90 diagonal down by just restricting your basal for a little bit. You'd much rather do little bumps than giant corrections. As someone once said, high blood sugars cause low blood sugars because you're sending so much insulin and you're bound to get a low later when you bump and you nudge. There's just these tiny little corrections. They don't really have the opportunity to push you too far, one way or the other. So on Thanksgiving morning, we're going to wake up. We're going to follow one of my wife's family traditions of having cinnamon buns. Now I'm going to get up a little bit before my daughter to make sure that her blood sugar is nice and low and steady, so that when I pre bullish for these cinnamon buns, I have a good starting point for the day. There's nothing more important than a good starting point after that, there's going to be food around the house all day. I'm going to be using temp, basal rates increased. I will stop them and start them as need be. When it's time for the meal, I'm going to look at the plate. I'm going to do my best to decide how much insulin this is going to take, and I am going to pre Bolus. I am going to be bold when I pre Bolus, and I'm going to try to time the food in my daughter with the insulin. Beginning to work, to get that tug of war that we talked about, if I miss either with too much insulin or too little insulin, I'm going to make small adjustments. I'm going to keep on top of it during the day. It's going to take a little bit of effort, but not a lot. And I'll tell you what, it's way better than having blood sugar. All day, that make you feel sick to your stomach, that give your kids a foggy feeling, that make them have a terrible time, and give you the guilt that you know you don't want. And if you're an adult living with type one diabetes, trust me, it's much easier to pay attention up front, to make these small decisions that give you good outcomes than it is to be stuck thinking about this all day long. Towards the end of the day, we'll do our best when the pie comes out and the ice cream and all that to keep ahead of it. And if she gets a little low at some points, we'll add a fast acting carb where it's necessary, because it is far easier to stop a low or falling blood sugar than it is to affect the high one. But I'm not going to let this day be ruined by the fear and the anxiety and high blood sugars, I don't think you should either. Please remember that nothing you heard today is advice medical otherwise, I wish you a ton of luck and success on Thanksgiving. Hope that being bold helps you, and if you're listening after Thanksgiving, these things that I do, I do them every day of the year, not just on Thanksgiving. I just thought today would be a really nice day to say Happy Thanksgiving. Here's some of the things we've been talking about in the last 138 episodes of The Juicebox podcast. Please, if you're just finding this episode now, go back and listen. There are hundreds, literally of conversations with people just like you. We talk about type one diabetes, what it's like to live with it, what it's like to try to management. These kinds of tips and tricks are scattered throughout every episode. I think you'll type one. Diabetes can happen at any age. Are you at risk? Screen it like you mean it. Because if just one person in your family has type one, you're up to 15 times more likely to get it too. So screen it like you mean it. One blood test can help you spot it early, and the more you know, the more you can do. So don't wait. Talk to your doctor about screening tap now or visit screen for type one.com to get more info and screen it like you mean it the contour next gen blood glucose meter is sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox podcast, and it's entirely possible that it is less expensive in cash, then you're paying right now for your meter through your insurance company. That's right. If you go to my link, contour, next.com/juicebox, you're going to find links to Walmart, Amazon, Walgreens, CVS, Rite, aid, Kroger and Meyer. You could be paying more right now through your insurance for your test strips and meter, then you would pay through my link for the contour next gen and contour next test strips in cash. What am I saying? My link may be cheaper out of your pocket than you're paying right now, even with your insurance, and I don't know what meter you have right now. I can't say that, but what I can say for sure is that the contour next gen meter is accurate. It is reliable, and it is the meter that we've been using for years. Contour next.com/juice box. And if you already have a contour meter and you're buying test strips, doing so through the Juicebox podcast link will help to support the show if you or a loved one was just diagnosed with type one diabetes, and you're looking for some fresh perspective. The bowl beginning series from the Juicebox podcast is a terrific place to start. That series is with myself and Jenny Smith. Jenny is a CD CES, a registered dietitian and a type one for over 35 years, and in the bowl beginning series, Jenny and I are going to answer the questions that most people have after a type one diabetes diagnosis. The series begins at episode 698, in your podcast player, or you can go to Juicebox podcast.com and click on bold beginnings in the menu this one Hey, kids, listen up. You've made it to the end of the podcast. You must have enjoyed it. You know what else you might enjoy? The private Facebook group for the Juicebox podcast. I know you're thinking, uh, Facebook, Scott, please. But no. Beautiful group, wonderful people, a fantastic community, Juicebox podcast, type one diabetes on Facebook. Of course, if you have type two, are you touched by diabetes in any way? You're absolutely welcome. It's a private group, so you'll have to answer a couple of questions before you come in. We make sure you're not a bot or an evildoer. Then you're on your way. You'll be part of the family.
Speaker 1 19:22
You you
Scott Benner 19:29
starting to see patterns, but you can't quite make sense of them. You're like, Oh, if I Bolus here, this happens, but I don't know what to do. Should I put in a little less, a little more? If you're starting to have those thoughts, you're starting to think this isn't going the way the doctor said it would. I think I see something here, but I can't be sure. Once you're having those thoughts, you're ready for the diabetes Pro Tip series from the Juicebox podcast. It begins at Episode 1000 you can also find it at Juicebox podcast.com up in the menu. And you can find a list in the private Facebook group. Just check right under the featured tab at the top, it'll show you lists of a ton of stuff, including the Pro Tip series, which runs from episode 1000 to 1025 I can't thank you enough for listening. Please make sure you're subscribed, you're following in your audio app. I'll be back tomorrow with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. You.
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#1369 Pitbull
Trisha has had T1D for 30 years, she is 44 years old and is a high school counselor with 1,200 students and no school nurse on site.
You can always listen to the Juicebox Podcast here but the cool kids use: Apple Podcasts/iOS - Spotify - Amazon Music - Google Play/Android - iHeart Radio - Radio Public, Amazon Alexa or wherever they get audio.
+ Click for EPISODE TRANSCRIPT
DISCLAIMER: This text is the output of AI based transcribing from an audio recording. Although the transcription is largely accurate, in some cases it is incomplete or inaccurate due to inaudible passages or transcription errors and should not be treated as an authoritative record. Nothing that you read here constitutes advice medical or otherwise. Always consult with a healthcare professional before making changes to a healthcare plan.
Scott Benner 0:00
Welcome back friends to another episode of The Juicebox podcast.
Tricia has had type one diabetes for 30 years. She is a high school counselor with 1200 students under her, 12 of them have type one diabetes, and there's no school nurse. We're going to talk about that. And it looks like there's a note here that says, Scott, you go off more than Clark Griswold in Christmas vacation when he finds out his bonus was a membership to the jelly of the Month Club. Seems like I'm going to go crazy in this one lucky you. Nothing you hear on the Juicebox podcast, should be considered advice medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan. Don't forget, if you're a US resident who has type one, or is the caregiver of someone with type one, visit T, 1d, exchange.org/juice box right now and complete that survey. It will take you 10 minutes to complete the survey, and that effort alone will help to move type one diabetes research forward. It will cost you nothing to help when you place your first order for ag one, with my link, you'll get five free travel packs and a free year supply of vitamin D drink. Ag one.com/juicebox, if you're looking for community around type one diabetes, check out the Juicebox podcast. Private Facebook group, Juicebox podcast, type one diabetes. The holidays are here, and you would like to give quality and comfortable gifts. I know you would head to cozy earth.com. Use the offer code Juicebox at checkout, save 40% off of your entire order. You'll be saving off of everything, your sheets, your towels. And ooh, look at this. Women stretch knit long sleeve bamboo pajama set. And look at this. They make them for men as well. This episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by the insulin pump that my daughter wears, Omnipod. Learn more and get started today with the Omnipod dash or the Omnipod five. At my link, omnipod.com/juicebox
Tricia 2:10
My name is Tricia, and I have had type one for 30 years. I'm 44 years old. I'm a school counselor, and I have, this year, I have 10 kiddos with type one that I am in charge of, because we don't have a school nurse.
Scott Benner 2:28
What how big is the school? You have 10?
Tricia 2:30
Oh, we have 1200
Scott Benner 2:33
1200 kids. Yep, that's a lot of kids at a school.
Tricia 2:37
It is. It's a high school. And we have, we have a district nurse, but because of funding, and who the hell knows, what else you know, we don't have a school nurse. So
Scott Benner 2:49
I want to know what the Who the hell knows? What else feel like? There's a story there. There
Tricia 2:55
is, but I'm gonna leave it off the air frame.
Scott Benner 2:59
You're like, I have a short list of stupid people, and here are their thoughts. So you're a counselor at that school, not not a medical person, okay, correct?
Tricia 3:10
I'm a counselor. I have no medical training myself. My mom is a nurse, but I couldn't force her out of retirement to come be our school nurse. I've tried, trust me, that
Scott Benner 3:21
also doesn't make you a nurse. So no, my wife is smart, and it's not rubbing off on me at all. Oh, my God. How did you get this job?
Tricia 3:29
I've been a counselor at this school for about six years now, going into my seventh in the fall, and prior to that, I was in another district, and I had I was a counselor there as well. So this year was a little bit weird. Of my 10 kiddos with type one, six of them were freshmen this past school year, and of those six, five had doctor's orders that they either had to be supervised when giving their insulin, or that somebody at the school had to give their insulin. A couple of them are cognitively impaired, so they don't, they don't function at the level of a typical high school kid. They function, you know, a little bit lower. The district nurse said that she couldn't do it, but that she could train a para pro to do it okay, and that worked briefly, and the the person who was doing it just wasn't really great with kids. So I just said I'd take it
Scott Benner 4:31
over. We've got a person now they're bad with kids. Now I know this is a high school, so you're wondering, how did this happen? But how many people do you think, you know, in this business that are bad with kids? One, not a lot, right?
Tricia 4:47
Not a lot. Most people who go into education truly love kids, and that's why we go into
Scott Benner 4:53
this. Gotta be a basic thing. Like, you know, you're not like rolling out of high school thinking, you know, I want to be rich. I think I want to be an. High School teacher,
Tricia 5:01
exactly.
Scott Benner 5:05
Yeah, that's it. That struck me as odd anyway. Well, that's dumb luck, but, but,
Tricia 5:09
but, you know, there's, there's always those people like, you know, I mean, I'm sure that there's a comedian somewhere who was who isn't funny, right? So, like, there's, there's always those people who don't fit their jacks.
Scott Benner 5:19
I've already seen your Netflix special, and yes, I was like, I don't Am I gonna laugh at some point? What's going on here? Everyone else says you're funny. What's going on? I think that about me. People probably like, if my kids, I know, don't think I'm humorous at all. So, and I think most people would think that I have a reasonable sense I
Tricia 5:37
would say, I think you have a reasonable sense of humor. Yeah,
Scott Benner 5:39
thank you. Also, sure it's fair to say on the podcast, I can't actually take the leash off and let it run, you know what I mean? Because it's a podcast about diabetes, right? Yeah, if I was doing something else, and maybe then you'd hear the whole thing, but, but nevertheless, okay, so you, you. So now, now you have functional control over these kids, or they're helping themselves mostly, and you step in if necessary,
Tricia 6:03
mostly, they're helping themselves. I have two kiddos that I'm I'm doing everything. The one young lady actually graduated this year. Super proud of her, but she is blind, not from diabetes, but from another thing that happened in her life, and she's cognitively impaired, so she like she functions at about the level of a second grader. So I'm doing her work. And then the other young man, nothing wrong with his vision, but he's cognitively a little bit lower than her. So for those two, I do the shots. I do the testing. They're not on pumps, despite my efforts to, you know, convince their parents
Scott Benner 6:51
that's a weird line. How do you go about that? How do you how do you walk that line? Well,
Tricia 6:55
with the one mom you know, every time the class has a snack, or they go on a field trip or whatever, and you know, so the day is off from what it would normally be, and she usually goes on those out of school experiences with him to help manage because I can't, I have another 200 kids I'm in charge of. I can't just leave school, you know, willy nilly, but so during the whole time, she'll be calling me, what would you do here? What would you do there? And I'll be honest. I mean, I first started on a pump when I was 20, and I'm 44 now, so trying to figure out how to regulate, like on long acting and short acting insulin, I can do it when it's a schedule, but when there's unscheduled things, my mind has to do a lot of math. And, you know, so I told her at one point. I said, you know, if he was on, you know, say, like a tea slim, or any pump, really, we could reduce his basal if he was doing a lot of activity, and it would make life easier, or go into exercise mode or something like that, I said, but I can't give you medical advice for what, how much long acting to give him, because I'm not a doctor, but here's what I would do type of thing. And she's like, Well, do you think a pump is good? I said, Yeah, I think it would make your life easier. I'll be honest, you know, but, but you've got to do what's right for you absolutely. So she's kind of in the position that her, her or his endo doesn't, and I understand this as well. Doesn't necessarily want to go with a pump like T slim or Medtronic, just because that would give him the ability to play with it himself. And he's a kid who likes to play with computers, likes to play with phones, things like that, and so they're a little bit worried about anything like that's the kid. He's 15, and we
Scott Benner 8:48
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Tricia 10:02
yeah? Because he functions at about the level of a five or six year old. Got
Scott Benner 10:06
it? Okay, yep, yep. So he also makes sense. Then, you know, right,
Tricia 10:11
yeah, right. So that's, that's kind of his doctor's worry. And I can see that, you know, and mom doesn't want to try, like, looping, or anything like that where she could do it because she's scared of that technology, let's say, so I get it, you know, I get it.
Scott Benner 10:28
Is there a chance there'll be a day when the cognitive ability rises that level of this being a possibility? Yeah?
Tricia 10:36
Yep. I think if we could just get him, you know, up to about, like a fourth, fifth grade level, he could probably handle it where he would know enough, at least, not to just randomly push buttons. You know what? I mean?
Scott Benner 10:49
Yeah. What's it like to to feel like you're helping all these kids? Like, like when you stepped in and said, I'll do this. What was your first thought? Like, I just can't leave them with this person? You
Tricia 11:01
know, it's weird, like, my first thought was, well, I understand this, and they're comfortable with me, because they know if they're having a a low, like I'm talking now the kids who manage themselves for the most part, but I'm just there to kind of, you know, in an emergency situation, yeah, you know they're comfortable with me. They know I know how they're feeling because I've had this for 30 years. So I I get what it feels like to be low or to be high or to, you know, guess wrong on how much you're going to eat for lunch and not want it all and pay the results later. I know all of that. And so I was just thinking, you know, these are my people. I can help them. And I still feel that way. I think I got kind of frustrated with with the woman who was going to help them, because even though they were high school, it was almost like a blame game with her, um, you know, why are you low? Why are you high? And she didn't understand that when you're a teenager, hormones and food and exercise and, oh, my God, there's a pretty girl over there, like, for the boys, you know, like she didn't get it that that can cause their sugars to do unexpected things at times, right?
Scott Benner 12:09
Or the girls, Trisha, really doesn't matter. Yeah? No, absolutely no. Well, I
Tricia 12:15
only have one girl in this whole group, so I've been calling them my boys for the most part. Oh,
Scott Benner 12:19
I see. Oh, that makes sense. Yeah. Also boys, probably more so if we're being honest, they would come to her with their issues, and she was busy, like blaming them by saying, What did you do? How did this happen? Those sorts of things. Yeah,
Tricia 12:34
that's not valuable. It's not valuable. And instead, you know, when your blood sugar is 50 with a down arrow, the kid needs to fix that. He can't think of why it happened. Like, give him a chance to fix it so his brain can work again, right? But sugar spoiling,
Scott Benner 12:48
let's stop and be critical thinkers now, right? Yeah. Do you think if you would have eaten three more crackers, this wouldn't have happened? Lady, I'm dead. Yeah. Come on. So you step in, you obviously have more, I mean, you have a ton of experience, right? So how old were you when you were diagnosed, 1414, yep, and yep. That's a long ass time ago, 30 years, 90s. It was six. What was it? 9090? 690-494-9494, yep. What was management like for you growing up, and what were your outcomes like?
Tricia 13:21
Well, when I first was diagnosed, I mean, what I remember is I was, I was a freshman in high school. I'd always been into sports, right? So I was playing volleyball, and suddenly I couldn't serve overhand anymore, like I just couldn't do it. I didn't have the strength, and I couldn't figure out why. And I was like, Well, I'm drinking water all the time. I'm going to the bathroom all the time. Long story short, I got diagnosed, right? Yeah, and I use r and n, those were the insulins I had. And it was all about, like, the exchange meal, like it was, you know, eat this many carbs for breakfast and this much protein and have a snack at 10 and then eat lunch at noon. And honestly, that really didn't work for my life very well. Even back then,
Scott Benner 14:05
I bet you most people wouldn't believe that exchange diet and our insulin, etc, was still 1994 Oh, but it was, it was for sure, yeah, but I bet you most people wouldn't think that. You know what I mean. I'm sorry. Go ahead it didn't work for your lifestyle, because it doesn't really work for anybody's lifestyle. But go ahead. Anybody's lifestyle. But go ahead, right? So
Tricia 14:24
today's
Scott Benner 14:25
episode of The Juicebox podcast is sponsored by Omnipod. Before I tell you about Omnipod, the device, I'd like to tell you about Omnipod, the company. I approached Omnipod in 2015 and ask them to buy an ad on a podcast that I hadn't even begun to make yet because the podcast didn't have any listeners, all I could promise them was that I was going to try to help people living with type one diabetes, and that was enough for Omnipod. They bought their first ad, and I used that money to support myself while I was growing the juice. Box podcast. You might even say that Omnipod is the firm foundation of the Juicebox podcast, and it's actually the firm foundation of how my daughter manages her type one diabetes every day. Omnipod.com/juice box, whether you want the Omnipod five or the Omnipod dash, using my link, let's Omnipod know what a good decision they made in 2015 and continue to make to this day, Omnipod is easy to use, easy to fill, easy to wear. And I know that because my daughter has been wearing one every day since she was four years old, and she will be 20 this year, there is not enough time in an ad for me to tell you everything that I know about Omnipod, but please take a look omnipod.com/juicebox I think Omnipod could be a good friend to you, just like it has been to my daughter and my family.
Tricia 15:55
My mom found a new I don't remember who my first endocrinologist was, I'll be very honest, I don't even remember their name, but she found a new endocrinologist for me who was willing to to work with me more, and who actually taught me, taught me carb counting. Within the next, like, one or two years, I still had the R in the end, but at least I had a little bit more control, because she was willing to let me do like instead of taking all my R at, you know, 7am before breakfast, I could do a shot before breakfast, a shot, you know, half an hour, 45 minutes before lunch, shot before dinner, things like that to just help me out with when I wanted to eat and when I wanted to play sports and when I wanted to do all of that. Yeah, I don't remember when I was, I was initially switched to human log, I think, and I don't remember what year that was, I'll be honest. What I do know is that when I was 19, I was in college, I met a girl with an insulin pump when I was at school, and I was like, Oh, my God. What is that? And how does it work, right? And so I very shortly after meeting her, which to a Medtronic pump in between my sophomore and junior years of college. I think it was human log. Is that what I used in that? But it didn't have a sensor. It didn't have any of that. I mean, we didn't have that technology yet, but at least I had the pump. So I was only on short acting insulin and basal rates, and, you know, all of all of that good stuff, but still manually figuring everything out. I tried one of the very first Medtronic sensors back in my 20s, and I probably tried it at the wrong time. I had it put on two days before my best friend's wedding, and I was made of honor, and it just kept beeping during the ceremony, and I ripped it off.
Scott Benner 17:50
That's not a Medtronic ad that they want. I was gonna say, let us be fair to them. Was that like 2000 ish, like, yeah. I
Tricia 18:00
mean, it was years ago, but I like the idea
Scott Benner 18:02
of you dropping it in the champagne fountain here, like, oh my god, this thing. No,
Tricia 18:07
it was literally like, we're walking back, you know. So they do the ceremony. We're walking back down the aisle after the bride and groom. And the guy was standing up with I had known for years. It was her brother's best friend, and I know on him forever. And I think, Dave, I'm ripping this thing off. I'll be right back for pictures.
Scott Benner 18:30
We're gathered here today be does anyone, anyone who thinks that these two people should not be baby? Yep, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Was there a lot of everybody,
Tricia 18:44
and everybody was so understanding that I was mortified. Oh, sure the
Scott Benner 18:49
hell no, listen, I think, I think ever since would want me to mention that if you had an ever since implantable CGM, you could have taken the transmitter off and then popped it right back on after the photos. Yeah, it
Tricia 18:59
would have been great
Scott Benner 19:02
ever since.com/juicebox but that's, well, listen, I like you in on technology early. Obviously, those of you who went and got that stuff early on are probably a large part about why. You know it still exists in perseverance today and has gotten better and better, because the message back then, even though it wasn't perfect, and you'd hear people say, like, oh my god, that Medtronic thing. It's like a harpoon, or, like, it doesn't work, or you always have to do this with it, but you the rest of what people would say is, but I wish it worked better, because I love it, right? Yeah, I want this. Yep,
Tricia 19:37
yeah, yep. But, you know, but I'll be honest, that scared me off of CGM for a while. I don't need to be just a beeping, you know,
Scott Benner 19:48
ruining wedding season for sure.
Tricia 19:53
The way I got back to using a CGM and as a result of a better system for. Me on in my, in my, I'm gonna say early to mid 30s, because I can't it was a long diagnosis, but I was diagnosed with Addison's disease, and I was going low for unknown reasons, and, yeah, like passing out and couldn't figure out what's wrong. And and my family was like, you either put a CGM on or you're never leaving the house, you know what I mean?
Scott Benner 20:23
Stop going to weddings, because we don't want you to fall into your head,
Tricia 20:26
right? And so at that time, I got a Dexcom. I was still using the Medtronic pump at the time because it wasn't like out of warranty yet, but I quickly switched to a tea slim, just because I kind of liked the direction. I mean, teesla wasn't, like, hooked up with Dexcom yet, but it seemed like they were going to, you know what I mean. So I got on that path, let's say, and it worked a lot better for me. And then a few years ago, when Omnipod five came out, I went that route, and that's what I'm on now, and I use it in automated so,
Scott Benner 20:58
oh, cool. Hey, guess what? This is interesting. Today you and I are recording OmniPods. Going to announce Omnipod five with
Tricia 21:08
I know I got the email. Yeah, okay, I did. I'm
Scott Benner 21:12
getting the all the low down in the skinny will be sent over to me later today. I think I might make a special podcast episode about it put up on the weekend so people know it's going to be a one of the other situation, though
Tricia 21:21
I know, and I don't know which way I want to go, I'll be honest. Like, I mean, I've been on the g6 forever, and it works great. Don't get me wrong. Like I have nothing against the g6 and I would love to have just one device, because I'm an iPhone person, and one device would be beautiful. Because even as a, you know, 44 year old woman in charge of all of these kids with type one, I leave my PDM behind at times. Not gonna lie, right? So, so it would be great. But on the other hand, having that ability with the g7 to like, do the whole thing where, like, you put on like, you put on the one and let it pre soak so that you don't have any time without readings. Like, that's super attractive to me. Pretty hot. Works great, too. Yeah. And the whole like, transmitter is in the sensor and, Oh, that. It all just sounds wonderful. So I don't know which way I want to
Scott Benner 22:15
go, for people who don't know what we're saying at launch. It's Omnipod five app for iPhone, compatible with g6 or Omnipod five, integration with Dexcom g7 it's one or the other. So if you want to do Omnipod five with the g7 you don't get the iPhone app yet. And if you want the iPhone app, you don't get the g7 yet.
Tricia 22:37
Yes, yeah, which makes it a hard decision. It's
Scott Benner 22:39
a bit of a warrant. One, I So, what do you think I need? Which way does the wind blow for you on this?
Tricia 22:49
So honestly, when I saw my initial was, I'd probably go to the g7 because I like the whole one device. I like the whole you can be without you can always know your readings. I love the whole talk to Apple Watch thing because then I just don't even necessarily need to have my phone on me. You know what I mean? I love all of that, and it's not a huge deal to me to carry the two devices that being said, I deserve the right to change my mind tomorrow. I mean, I'm really torn. I'll be honest. I
Scott Benner 23:28
hear you, yeah, now, well, you do what you'll do, but I mean, listen, if I got the vote, I would g6 with iPhone app. Okay, man. I mean, I Arden's been wearing g7 forever. Yeah,
Tricia 23:41
yeah. I've heard, I've heard, and the thing that kept her away from the five was that she had to carry the two devices. Yeah,
Scott Benner 23:47
I wouldn't go backwards. Like, if, I mean, you're putting me in a I'm putting myself in a false position where I'm deciding. But if Arden said to me, Hey, I want to go back to g6 so I can have an iPhone app, and she was using Omnipod five, and I go, whatever you want to do is fine. But like, for my money, if it was me, if I was already on g7 I would just stay and because I got to assume the iPhone apps coming at some point. And like, that would be, that would be my thinking. I don't know if that's right or not, but that's what I would think. Like, I don't know, and I
Tricia 24:18
might just wait and let other people, like, try it out. Like, try it out. Like, try both them out at first, and then make up my mind, and maybe by that time, they'll have the g7 for the iPhone. Who knows?
Scott Benner 24:27
Yeah, well, sick, okay, or
Tricia 24:29
maybe not. I mean, I'm being overly optimistic there. I
Scott Benner 24:32
don't know it's got it, like, obviously, there's a lot about the process that that we don't understand, right? That's what I think. Because when people are like, Why don't they just or, how come it takes so long, or whatever? Like, I don't know. What do you think they're like, sitting in the office, like, playing ping pong and going, like, should we get back to it? You know what I mean? Like, it's my assumption. Is they're working as fast and as hard as they can, and this is how long it takes, you know? So, right? Who knows? Maybe I'm wrong. People, they're playing ping pong. I have no idea. I'm just saying it makes sense to me, the one way that it's weird to complain about stuff like that, like, as if the company is like, Nah, screw it.
Tricia 25:10
No. I mean, and you know, having type one for 30 years, like, I'm just so thankful that we're at where we're at, like, yeah, it's so much different from, you know, the the days of my exchange diet and R and so I'm just, I'm grateful that that we have these choices now, right? Came
Scott Benner 25:28
pretty far, pretty fast with the technology. That's for sure, absolutely Are you and you're using which pump now,
Tricia 25:35
Omnipod, five you're on? Okay,
Scott Benner 25:38
right? For sure. I it's funny, because even though that's what we've been talking about, like, when you said about the kids, you're like, I don't know, maybe we should get them, like, a tea slim or something. I'm like, it's interesting that you didn't suggest the pump that you use.
Tricia 25:49
Well, here's my reason why, because you have to know their doctor. Their doctors are all very anti Omnipod. Unfortunately, now I have a couple of the kids are on OmniPods, and they're independent, and they're doing fantastic. In fact, one of them, one of my boys, who's actually in hence going into 11th grade. Now, he did not have very good control at all as a freshman, and he switched to the Omnipod five last summer, and he is doing so much better. I'm so proud of him, because he was a kiddo who just didn't want to ever he had to have a private spot to take a shot, a private spot to eat food if he needed it or whatever. And now he's just like, oh, do to do. I'm done. I'm good. I can go, You know what I mean. And so I love it for him, and I love it for my other young man who's on it like they're both doing fantastic, but unfortunately, the kiddos who I really think could benefit from the pump all have one certain doctor in my state who is every time their parents bring up pumps, the only one he mentions is T slim, because I think it's because it's What he's comfortable with, type of thing. Yeah, happens all the time. And, you know, and to me, I mean, both work well, I like both. For me, the Omnipod works better. And so if I had my choice, yeah, I'd be pushing them all to the Omnipod Absolutely. I have better control on the Omnipod. I don't. I had a lot of trouble on T slim. I could never dial in my settings enough overnight, or I would dial them in too much, or, I don't know how to explain it, but like, I would go low at least once a week, to where I'd have to wake up and get something that doesn't happen on the Omnipod. For me, I get sleep. It's fantastic. And I'm not going that high either. You know, I might go up to like 120 but it's not horrible. And I come right back down to around 90 to 110, type of thing, you know. But I'm seeing that in the morning, when I wake up and look at the graph, I don't have to wake up and get myself there talk
Scott Benner 27:49
to people a little bit about how important that is, that you've 30 years in the sleep. Seriously, like the sleep part, like, how has that changed your life? Amazing.
Tricia 27:59
It changed my life. I mean, I'll be honest, it's, I mean, I was never one as a teenager when I was first diagnosed. It's not like my I mean, my parents were very supportive, don't get me wrong, but they didn't wake up and check me at like, 2am or something like that. It was just, you know, hopefully she's okay. As soon as I started wearing a CGM and being a little bit more mature myself and finger pricking more reliably in the middle of the night just to see where I was at. You know, I might be 41 night, I might be 190 another night, and I'd have to either eat or take insulin. Then you don't get that right back to sleep. It's not like you suck down your juice box and go right to sleep, because you have to wait for those numbers to come up, and it's just, it's a sleep is so wonderful. I don't know how to explain it. I function better. I'm able to not have to take a nap after work. I'm able to, you know, cook and clean and work and exercise and play with my dog and all of that without going I just want to sit on the sofa because I didn't sleep last night. Yeah.
Scott Benner 29:06
Anyway, it's really important. And what, and where's your one seat at right now? Like, how are your outcomes?
Tricia 29:11
It's been between like a five four and a five six for about the three years that I've been on Omnipod now.
Scott Benner 29:18
And do you have an eating style that's specific or No,
Tricia 29:22
honestly, no, I'm not low carb, I'm not keto, I'm not I'm not somebody who's going to go to a fast food restaurant every day, because I don't think it's healthy. But I just eat a normal, what I would call a normal diet. You know, I might have some eggs and maybe a piece of toast in the morning and maybe some soup and fruit for lunch and a snack mid afternoon, if I'm hungry, if not. You know, supper is usually like tonight. For supper I made, it's in the crack pot, but it's just I didn't feel like cooking today. It's, it's 90 degrees here in Michigan, so I'm not cooking right now. Yeah. But it, you know, I just threw some chicken and cheese and rice in the crock pot the moraine, and we'll have that tonight so
Scott Benner 30:09
they can do 70 or more carbs a day, no problem. Yeah, absolutely, right, absolutely Well, good for you. What? What, a what. There's an ad for Omnipod, omnipot.com/juice, box. Seriously, that's an Omnipod five ad right there. That's fantastic. What? And your activity level can't be, no offense, can't be great. You're sitting in a school
Tricia 30:27
all day. No, it's not. I mean, I would love to say I exercise, you know, five days a week, I don't, I don't. And what I call my fake job, I do breed and show dogs, which is weird, and I'm not going to get into all of that, but I have to keep the dogs in shape, so I will take them for walks and things like that daily. But we're talking like a mile. Maybe it's not hard running or anything like that. You know, it's not, not anything huge. How
Scott Benner 30:53
many dogs have you had in your lifetime?
Tricia 30:56
Oh, that's a great question. I honestly don't know a lot. Something I was born into. I currently have seven.
Scott Benner 31:03
Okay, let me ask you a question. Yeah, this is gonna feel like a big left turn. Don't bum out on me. Okay. No, you're good. All right. Tricia, hold tight with me. Okay, okay, we have to put our oldest dog down tomorrow. I
Tricia 31:16
was worried you were going to ask me that. Okay, yeah, go on.
Scott Benner 31:19
How do you know you're doing the right thing?
Tricia 31:21
I think if you feel like it's time, you know it's the right thing. If you know that your dog isn't having the quality of life that makes your dog happy, and that when you look at your dog, you feel more sad than happy, then you kind of know it's the right time.
Scott Benner 31:39
That's good advice. Okay, he's over 16 years old, first of all, and he's had a great life, and it's been a fantastic, genuinely wonderful pet, great companion for everybody. And over the last, you know, couple years, walking has gotten harder for him, but in in the last year, it's more difficult. He needs a ramp to go downstairs now,
Tricia 32:01
right?
Scott Benner 32:02
He is incontinent, like he has he has sun downers like in the two cataracts. Can't see, Can't hear you approach him, you're you scare the crap out of him when you're standing next to him and talking to him, and there's no life in his face anymore, like you don't. He doesn't seem to go from happy to sad, to tired, or anything like that. It just stares a lot. Yeah, it's yeah, it's hard. We're
Tricia 32:26
getting pretty close. I mean, this sounds horrible, and it's not to make you upset, but when they get to that point, in my opinion, it's not a day too early, but it could be a day too late. And what I mean, what I mean by that is, if you wait too long, then then they're suffering, right? Yeah, and we're lucky enough to be able to do that for our pets, so that's,
Scott Benner 32:51
I appreciate that. Thank you. And that's the mindset we've taken. We've gotten advice from a number of places, taken all the online quizzes, and then in the end, you start having that thought. Like, like, what you just said, like, if, if tomorrow's too soon, but next Thursday is too late, right? What are we trading Exactly? Yeah, so it's but then it seems like it becomes more about you than them. Yep, yeah. We're trying not for that to happen anyway, we've arranged someone to come to the house and do it. Oh, good, yeah, that we're gonna bury him here on our property too. Okay, are the kids home right now? They are. That's another reason, and that's good. Yeah. We tried to imagine doing this when, like, Arden was in college or something, and it just felt like crazy, like, what were we gonna just call her and tell her we had to put Indy to sleep and like she can't do anything about that? With those feelings? You know, she's stuck there by herself. And it just felt like, even at that, like even if now while she's home, even if he could maybe stretch it out a couple of more months, it might be more detrimental to him and to other people to wait. This is such a strange thing. You know,
Tricia 34:04
it's and it's hard. It's one of those hard decisions. And I think this is going on another tangent, but you stay with me now. So okay, you know my my grandma, who lived with us my whole life, died of cancer when I was in my early 20s, and she looked at me about a week before she passed, and she said, if I was a dog, you and your dad would have put me out of my suffering by now.
Scott Benner 34:31
Oh my gosh, yeah. What a straightforward lady,
Tricia 34:36
but, but, I mean, she was right.
Scott Benner 34:38
I mean, we would have, you know, take all the pencils from her. Then when she said that, yeah, gloves, yeah,
Tricia 34:42
we cleared her bed, you know?
Scott Benner 34:45
Well, I was gonna say something similar, without the anecdote about my grandmother. When my mom was done, I was like, Let's get her out of this as fast as we can. Yep, and for some reason, when it's my dog. Hug. I was like, I don't know he could probably hang on a little longer. And I think the difference in those initial reactions because I've come around on Indy, but I think the difference in the initial reactions is that my mom could could communicate with me, and so I was sure this is right. And whereas with him, I'm like, what if I'm just misinterpreting this? That's the fear. But I'm beyond that. Now I think, I think we're pretty sure we're doing the right thing. Yeah,
Tricia 35:28
take it from me as somebody who, well, this is another change, but I was literally born because a veterinarian figured out how to keep my mom pregnant. My mom had a lot of miscarriages before I was born. For real,
Scott Benner 35:42
your mom like a cocker spaniel or what? What's going on there?
Tricia 35:45
No, my mom's a human being. Makes more sense. My mom, my mom would have miscarriages in her second trimester, which is unusual, right? Like normally, if you get through the first trimester, you're good to go and her OB GYN, could not figure out why, and and she and my dad were heartbroken. And personally, I don't know why they kept trying, like I don't, I guess I'm glad. Don't get me
Scott Benner 36:11
wrong, I'm glad I'm here.
Tricia 36:13
Yeah, I mean, just as a as a woman, if that had been me, I would have just given up and either adopted or just that I'm not having kids or whatever, right? So my dad, at the time, was doing some research with a veterinarian who where dogs were basically, they call it reabsorption in dogs, but it's a miscarriage, right? Like they're pregnant and then they're not, and they never have the puppies. And what they found out in the dogs is that the dogs levels of progesterone were dropping dangerously low, and that's why the puppies were not making it to term. Okay, so my mom went to her OB GYN and I was born at like a hospital that specialized in difficulties, and they gave her more progesterone, and she was able to carry me to term. I'll
Scott Benner 37:04
be damned. That's crazy. I also want to point out that I wasn't saying that we put my mom to sleep. No, I know, but I will say this, and I have no trouble saying this. She was in hospice on morphine, and they give her a certain amount, she was clearly not gonna wake up, and if she woke up, she was gonna wake up to having cancer throughout her body again and like and it wasn't, it wasn't happening anyway, trust me. And when I had to leave where she was, but my one brother stayed behind, and I said to him on the way out, hey, they gave you that button for extra morphine. You're allowed to push it every five minutes. Yep, I was like, push it every in five minutes. Like, I'm so sorry I can't do it. But like, sit here and push that goddamn button all day. Get her, like, get her out of this, you know. And seriously, then I my a year do you know? I can't believe this is happening, but Indy's gonna pass of our choosing on the first anniversary of my mom's passing.
Tricia 38:03
Oh my gosh, yeah,
Scott Benner 38:04
the timing's just insane. Like, I called and I was like, I need an appointment. You know, it should be this week. Blah, blah, blah. Person picks the date. I look on the calendar and I'm like, oh my god, this is crazy. I appreciate it. I'm sorry. It was such a long you great dogs. How lovely.
Tricia 38:21
Give me some advice. No,
Scott Benner 38:23
I would imagine, is it not easy to have for dogs that have sex and make puppies? Or is there something to it?
Tricia 38:30
It depends on the dog, really. So my dogs, my dogs, it's no problem. They're like, I have beagles and Alaskan Malamutes, which I don't breed them together, like they stay apart, but I was born into my all meets, and I got involved in beagles when I was in my early 20s. Yeah, for my particular breeds, it's not an issue, like, you know, the girl comes and he the boy gets excited, and they do what dogs do. But for some breeds, like Bulldogs, for example, they can't do it naturally, because they're not built to do it naturally like the girls. The girls are too small to take the mail and,
Scott Benner 39:10
holy hell, this took a turn. Go ahead.
Tricia 39:15
I'm like, How do I go? I don't know special
Scott Benner 39:16
genre, though, of whatever we're talking about. Yes. So,
Tricia 39:20
so there are certain breeds of dogs that it is not done naturally, and that they don't birth the puppies naturally, because the puppies are like, their heads are too big to come out. A Bulldog is an example of this, right? Yes, a bulldog is an event. Like
Scott Benner 39:35
we stopped breeding Bulldogs. They wouldn't exist in one generation. Well,
Tricia 39:39
it might take a couple. I mean, you might have some really determined ones. Yeah,
Scott Benner 39:43
a real Bulldog, right? Yeah, really not to get in there. I hear what you're saying. Okay, when does it stop being weird? What? How many years into it until you're like, Oh, I'm like, a pornographer for dogs. Like, seriously, when does it just become like, really, like, old hat, not. Talk to you.
Tricia 40:00
It is already, I mean, I was born into it, right? So, like, this is a horrible story, but it's funny. Like, when I go out with my what I call my dog friends, right? Like, if we're at a show and we go out to dinner, or something like that, the poor waitresses are shocked at some of the crap we're talking about. But it's just natural. It's dinner conversation,
Unknown Speaker 40:20
all right? I don't want
Tricia 40:22
to hear it. No, I'm not going to share it with you. You don't
Scott Benner 40:25
have to do anything that they have to do when they breed horses, right? You're not like that involved, are you?
Tricia 40:29
I have been Yes. Oh
Scott Benner 40:30
my goodness, Trisha, thank you for telling me that I appreciate this. I don't know what this episode is going to be called, but I think there's going to be a euphemism in the title. That's for sure. Actually, I don't. I wouldn't know how to do that. I don't think I could get that past the sensors. You know what I
Tricia 40:47
mean? I'll email you some phrases that we use. I don't want to say them on air. I
Scott Benner 40:51
want to say any of them. Give me one, just what's your favorite one?
Tricia 40:54
Give me a minute to think.
Scott Benner 40:56
I don't take your time. I don't know. We'll go back to the diabetes while you're chatting to the diabetes.
Tricia 41:00
That's easier right now.
Scott Benner 41:03
Watch this as I just move effortlessly from what I think is a well, you know, I
Tricia 41:09
had a dog with diabetes there.
Scott Benner 41:11
I mean, I'm getting ready to like, pivot from like. What I think is you telling me about manually manipulating a dog to like. Your note here that says I want to talk about my boys and our school adventures this year.
Tricia 41:25
Oh, that sounds bad. Yeah, I
Scott Benner 41:27
could have probably paced this differently. I apologize, but let's just get past that. It's homecoming. My day started with one of my boys having a low blood sugar seizure at the bus stop.
Tricia 41:36
Oh, god, yeah. What happened this one was this one was interesting. So much happened on homecoming, Scott, you don't even want to know.
Scott Benner 41:45
I think I do want to know, because Tell me. Tell me, seriously, what? What happened at homecoming? So I
Tricia 41:51
was gonna call him D, because I don't want to use his name. D has a seizure waiting for his bus. His mom calls me in a panic because I work in a I work in a school that, let's just say, is not very high socio economic status, right? So, like, parents don't have cars to get to their kids to assist with these types of things. I see, okay, you know, I go driving over there. I dial 911, on the way, because I don't want this kid dying. And, you know, I get there around the same time EMS does, and he's no longer speaking, but he's definitely unconscious. The EMS workers who, who, they're fantastic. Don't get me wrong, like we have some great people in our city here. You know, they're looking at me, and I'm like, he has type one. He's really low. I don't know what his number is, I need to find his phone, but just shoot him with some D 50 now, like, just take my word on it. They get him out of it. I call mom back, let her know he's okay, and she was like, Well, do they have to take him to the hospital? I said, Well, that's up to you here. Talk to the people like they're willing to let him come to school, but they kind of need you to get here. Do you have a way here? You know, legally, I can't drive him back to school. She was able to find a ride from a neighbor, and got there, and he came to
Scott Benner 43:11
but so you were able to get him a ride to school, so we're able to get him to school.
Tricia 43:15
He's doing all right. Meanwhile, another kiddo I had, who we'll call T who was a recent transplant to our school. He came here from another state. Didn't know this kid real well. He was in 12th grade, but he was not well controlled at all. He didn't he didn't have the means to take care of himself. You know, his he had a very sad situation. He moved back in with his mom, but his mom had lost custody when of him. When he was younger, he'd been living with a family member who passed away, so he's dealing with all of that, and his blood sugar was usually high, sometimes low, just roller coaster. We had a pep assembly. It was in the gym because it was raining. I was standing kind of by, like by one of the walls in the gym, watching the kids do whatever they do during pub assemblies, bands and cheerleaders and all that stuff. And so T comes up to me, and he's like, I don't feel good. And I was like, Well, what do you mean? You don't feel good? Well, I think I need to go to the bathroom. I need I might need to throw up. And I said, Okay, so let me go out there with you. So he goes into the bathroom, takes about five minutes, comes up. I was like, why don't you check your blood sugar for me? So he checks, and it just reads high. And I was like, oh boy,
Scott Benner 44:37
yeah, figured that part out.
Tricia 44:39
I said, I'm thinking you have some ketones. I said, When was the last time you took your insulin? Because this is a kid who just would forget to take his insulin, and it's about 1010, 30 in the morning at this point. He was like, Uh, I think yesterday at lunch, when you made me? Wow. Okay, great, great.
Scott Benner 44:57
Jesus. And this. It a pump or an MDI? Yeah. So do we even know that? Does the person even are they even shooting their basal insulin? Probably
Tricia 45:09
right, probably not. Probably not. Oh, geez. So I try to get hold of his mom. Remember I told you she had lost custody earlier in his life, and I call a couple times, and all I'm getting is voicemail, and I'm like, bud, do you remember? Like, where's mom? Is she at work? Where's she at? And he was like, Oh, she she went to a party. Okay,
Scott Benner 45:29
I need more parties during the day. Trisha, I gotta be honest with you, I've never been to a 11am party in my life, but it sounds amazing. It does,
Tricia 45:37
yeah, yeah. I'm like, okay, and it was a Friday, so I'm trying to think the best thoughts, like, maybe she was going to a wedding or something, and they were starting. I'm trying to think positive thoughts about this. Okay, a little
Scott Benner 45:49
this is water in you. I see it. Let's just think the best of people. I like that. I try to ride like that myself. Okay,
Tricia 45:55
so I'm like, okay, buddy, is there some she's the only person on his emergency card. I was like, Is there somebody else? Because school is going to get out in half an hour, and I am not comfortable sending you home because you have high ketones. Your blood sugar is over 600 I kind of want to call 911, but at the same time, I don't want to do that without knowing there's somebody to pick you up when you know what I mean? Yeah. I'm like, and so he was like, well, one of my cousins goes to and he named a different school in town. You can try her mom. I said, Okay, do you have her number? And he's not thinking clearly at this time for obvious reasons. And he's like, Well, I don't know. I said, Well, give me your phone. What's her name. Let me try to find this person so I get hold of like, it would be like his step Aunt, I guess I would say, like, it's not a biological person. And I was like, Look, do you have a way to get hold of his mom to get permission if I 911 I said, I think he really needs some IVs right now. Like, he needs fluids. He needs insulin in and I'm not equipped to do that at this time with his shot. Like he needs more than I can do. I can't give the fluids. I said, Can you like, can you get hold of his mom and tell her that she needs to get hold of me. Like, here's my cell phone, here's my work phone. Help me out. And she was like, Yep, I will. So I wait. I did call 911, I wait like, two hours. The woman finally calls me back and then chews me out because I interrupted her day.
Scott Benner 47:29
Well, she was at a party. Yeah? And you know, once you get that vibe going, I know, I know, it's hard to get it back. Sometimes, you know what I mean, like you feel in the music and you're like, it's right there in your hips, and then somebody, like, comes up and harsh. And harshes your vibe, and then all of a sudden, what are you supposed to do? Just go find it again. It's difficult. Why don't you try thinking about other people sometimes? Okay? Can you imagine I would just be like, Oh no, it's okay. You're welcome, right? No good deed. Thank you. By the way, this day after school, you could be home.
Tricia 48:03
I could be Yeah, but I'm not. You
Scott Benner 48:07
could have been like, Hey kid, good luck. Hope you don't die. See ya, I gotta go watch. The Price Is Right, but not you. No, you're trying to help. I see okay, yeah, I don't know what to say. I do like you telling this story, because I get worried sometimes that some of the people listening could think like, oh, the world I live in where I chase down my five, four, my six, three, A, 1c, and I'm, you know, I didn't know how to do this, but then I found a podcast, and I got better at it, and blah, blah, blah. Like, I think they think that's how everybody is, but most people are the story you're telling with diabetes. It's sad, but a lot of people are living really tight rope kind of lives with their health. And I appreciate you telling the story, and I appreciate you sticking up for the kid and doing something. It's nice, you know.
Tricia 48:49
Oh my gosh. Oh, that's thank you so much. And there we go. And but what I was going to start telling you was, what this did you have to hear this part? Because, yes, it's kudos to you. But so this, this whole homecoming, I
Scott Benner 49:01
don't know I was gonna get some kudos. Go ahead. You're gonna, you're gonna get some kudos.
Tricia 49:05
Scott, so this whole homecoming episode, I went, how am I gonna help these kids? Because I can't live like this. I can't, I can't worry as much as I'm worrying about these children, sure. And so I started making them listen to the podcast during what we call it's like a study hall. I won't say what we call it, because then you might know where I work. But like, we have two days a week we have a study hall. Okay? So my children would come down to my office and I just play them random little podcast episodes. And then we started diving into, like, the ones that are actually educational, but I had to get them with some entertaining ones. First, how entertaining? Well, we weren't talking about, like, dog manipulation. Well,
Scott Benner 49:52
thank God, because I think that gets you fired, if I'm being honest. But I mean, honestly, I like you, and I think I'd have you kicked out if you were doing that. I feel like Trisha seems okay, but she's unstable. Listen to what she's telling the kids. Did they take something from it,
Tricia 50:06
and so most of them did. In fact, one of them kind of funny. So he I feel bad for this kid. And like, this sounds horrible, but in my brain, if he just had, like, parents who at all were more capable of understanding he'd be so much better off. But his parents are a little bit older, and his dad has type two and doesn't seem to really understand the difference between type one and type two. So anyway, take a long story short, this kid went from like averaging about 220 at lunchtime, and about, I don't know, 250 on the bus side home to now he's down to about 130 to 160 so he took it to heart, because he was given the tools, you know, to learn better how to take care of himself. He just, he just wouldn't be Bolus, like, if he had, like, a fat or protein rise his he didn't understand that he needed to maybe take a little bit more when that was happening, right?
Scott Benner 51:11
Wait, so tell me where he started and where he ended up. The beginning
Tricia 51:14
of the year, he was consistently 220, to 250, sometimes even 300 okay, like, and so now, I mean, school is out now for the kids, but you know, a week ago was our last day, very consistently, like 120 to 160 Oh, my
Scott Benner 51:31
goodness, isn't that great? Yeah, yeah, it's awesome. Yep. Shame you can't listen to this because of the filth you talked about in the middle. But I'll just
Tricia 51:39
fast forward.
Scott Benner 51:42
But I'd love to say, congratulations. That's, that's really something.
Tricia 51:45
I mean, they didn't all have that big of a you know? I mean, not all of them, but he really took it to heart. Another one of the kills was a little bit, I shouldn't say, different, but just different from what most people experience. I think he was diagnosed three years ago, and his honeymoon lasted about two and a half years, like it lasted forever. And so he was a kid who, at the beginning of the year, was always taking 1.5 units of insulin for about 36 to 40 grams of carbs, and his blood sugar was always like 90 to 120 I mean, it was beautiful, but it was not where he ended up at the end of the year. So at the end of the year, he just started creeping up, like higher and higher, to some days where he was mid to high 200 and then he would crash. He would go down to about 40, and it was just very much a roller coaster. Um, he's on MDI, but he does have a Dexcom. He was one at the beginning of the year that was like, I don't need the podcast. Like, I'm perfect anyway, right? Yeah. But then when he started coming out of his honeymoon, he would come down to my office, if he got done with his lunch early, and be like, Hey, can you turn on another episode for me of one of those, like, Pro Tip series, because I need to figure this stuff out. But still, and I'd be like, Okay, no problem. How old? How old 14?
Unknown Speaker 53:04
Oh, yeah.
Tricia 53:05
It was awesome.
Scott Benner 53:07
You know, Trisha, you made my day. I took I took it today from the internet, and this was nice to hear. Well, yeah, no, seriously, it's very helpful, because, you know, I listen, I don't listen to people, right? It's fine if they want to say whatever they want to say, right? It's all fine. But somebody in in one of those private Facebook groups, they they keep lying about Arden, they're touching your kid. And I took it for a while, but I was like, I'm gonna swing back now, absolutely, yeah, yes, I put up a little thing today too. I mean, this will be six months old by the time people hear it. So good luck finding it. But, you know, I just made it very clear that, you know, I mean, she gonna lie, you're gonna lie, whatever. It's fine. But like, stay pointed at me. You don't even like Yeah, yeah, I'm your target. You don't like me, which is fine. And I told them, Trisha, I was very eloquent my note, but what I said was I told them that I know they think they're surrounded by their followers, but a lot of those people think they're crack pots, and frequently send me complete screenshots of the horrible things and lies that they say and that I know they think in their little b Facebook group that gets a post or two a day, and there's a couple people in it, they think that that's the whole world. If I expose them to the public, they're gonna understand what the spotlight really means. So this podcast has an insane reach, absolutely and I have every horrible thing they've ever seen said screenshot, and I'd be happy to make it public if they don't stop. I was much more eloquent when I said it right.
Tricia 54:52
I have to go find it when we're done. Yeah, yeah. I
Scott Benner 54:54
mean, I'd read it to you here. I'll tell you what. For fun, I can give you the last bit of it. Give me a second here. Got to make a click on something here. Now it built, by the way, it was very thoughtful at the beginning, and it's really very contextual, and gives a whole, full feeling. And then at the end, it said this, the next person who lies about my kid in their private Facebook group or lies about what I share about diabetes is going to find out what it means to be called out on a worldwide podcast. Trust me, it won't be as low impact as when you talk your slanderous on your beat ass little Facebook group that no one sees you. Think you're in this game, but you're not. But keep you up your shit and you will be and I bet that you can't take it. Take some advice from someone who actually knows what it means to be in the spotlight, your unstable little nut will crack real fast when the public calls you out. Right now, you're in a one sided war. Don't drag me into it, because if you get me started, I'm gonna win. My best advice is to shut your mouth. I know you think you're in some little safe place surrounded by your people, but news flash, a number of them think you're a crackpot, and they send me a lot of screen captures. One day, one of you is going to push me past my significant ability to turn the other cheek. Be clear. I will post your words just as you type them for the world to see. And I actually reach people that wet match of yours doesn't want this flame more. Now I finished here, Trisha, I said, Now crawl back into your whole scumbag and don't mention my daughter again and to your minions. If you leave my group today, I won't include you in this. If it blows up, stay and you're all fair game. You've all sucked the Master's teeth in writing, and I have those screen caps too. Now go off and tell your leader what I said. You hear me clapping? Two pointed, two pointed. Trisha, how'd I do?
Tricia 56:37
Very good. And out of two,
Scott Benner 56:39
you did great. Tired of Mother curse Jesus Christ like and by the way, I want to be very clear to say that it's not 99.9% of people is an is even, like, an understatement. It's barely a 10th of a percent when
Tricia 56:53
you've just gotten somebody's child that's different, that changes all the rules. I mean, yes,
Scott Benner 56:58
but also, like, don't lie. There's plenty of things you could say about me to make your point that would be 100% true. Why make something up? And it's all the time goes back years. I'll never forget this one lady, and by the way, I have your screen cap still too, honey. I'll never forget this one lady who told what they call, I don't know, you know, Yiddish, a Bucha Meister made up a whole story about how they know me personally, and behind the scenes, I quietly take money from people to set up their blood sugars. And I'm like, I've never done that in my entire life. I don't even know what they're talking about. Like, so I read what she wrote to this person, and I swear to you, it's paragraphs of just make believe. Oh, my goodness. And when you really look at what she was doing, and again, this one was yours, right? If you this is not a new this happens to me like, I got, I'm a ducks back. I don't care, like, you know what I mean, like, but you shouldn't, shouldn't mention my kid. And so, like, this stuff goes on and on forever, and I'm used to it. It's, it's, by the way, the same group of people over a decade, I know they all must think that they're the pinnacle of their space, but trust me, there's been lunatics that came before you that are gone and you'll be gone one day too. What I realized when I read this one paragraph was all this person was trying to do was to defame me, to keep this other person in their Facebook group. That's all they care about, is not letting you
Tricia 58:21
out of their group. Because, if you right, well, because
Scott Benner 58:25
if you go somewhere else and find out what a bunch of lunatics they are, you're not coming back and they want they it's some bizarre power move that, like, I mean, and Trisha, there's no power in being the admin of a Facebook group. And if that feels powerful to you. You need a
Tricia 58:41
therapy that powerful. It's just a lot of work,
Scott Benner 58:45
and it's one of the things that I listen I enjoy that community so much. I love what it does for people, and the day I don't have to take care of it anymore. I'm gonna go on vacation. It's such trouble, you know, and not again, not from the good people. It's the tiny percent of
Tricia 59:01
that little percentage I get it. I mean, I Oh, you know, in my dog world, I'm an admin of a Facebook group that does not reach nearly as many people as you do, but I've wanted to quit several times. That's
Scott Benner 59:13
insane. Like, have an opinion. It's fine. Tell me I'm wrong. I don't even mind. Like, come tell me I'm wrong. The problem is, is that when they get cornered and there's nowhere else to go, and the you know, it's you kind of are, like, look, you're being mean to people. Because, you know, Patricia, you listen long enough. I don't care how people eat. I don't care what you do. Take care of yourself, whatever you want to do. I couldn't care less. Here's what I do, if it works for you. God bless. Like, and if you're not interested, like, I couldn't possibly care less. Like, it's fine, just it's fine. But my God, like they want to rant and rave. They want to tell people what to do. They want to make fun of people for the way they eat, and if you don't let them, then they run back into their hidey hole and then tell all their little minions that you kick them out and you wouldn't let them be there. I'm like, I didn't. Kick you out. I just said, be nice to people, and then you over and over again. Couldn't be nice to people, and I eventually had to say to you, please leave. I didn't even kick you out. I said, Please leave. Right? You're never gonna meet a person in charge of a community who tries as hard to include everybody as I do. Absolutely no. I
Tricia 1:00:18
agree 100% Yeah,
Scott Benner 1:00:20
the people in my life who see it like, and I don't just mean family members, I mean people who help behind the scenes are like, Why are you trying so hard to save this unsavable person? And I'm like, I don't know. Like, it just feels wrong to, like, exclude them, and I want it to be everybody. But, man, it's hard, like, in a world where everybody's trying to section you up into a team so you can go fight with somebody, right? Like, I'm the one who's like, everybody, come on in. It's fine, right? You know? And then every time you try to, like, move things forward, can I rant a little longer? Right ahead? Scott, okay, thank you. I mean, you talked about what, you talked about, the dog thing. And I feel like the little latitude here. Now, you know what I mean, every time I try to push it farther a little bit, it starts over again with a new group of people. And what do I mean by that? Like, when I started blogging, I was just like, look, I don't know what I'm talking about. My daughter's having these terrible outcomes. I'm following the doctor's advice. And then I figure some things out, and I start writing, and I'm like, Hey, I think if you do this, happens. And you know, if you put your insulin in a little earlier, before food, and you really find the balance between the the food and the insulin, like, you don't really get a spike and like, like, you can see me in the blog talking it through, right and then, and that blog was dude, that blog got so many millions of clicks a year for years, I never sold an ad on it, because it wasn't that hard. I sat down and I wrote, I put it up. It wasn't a ton of time out of my being, you know, not a lot of skin off my ass. And then so, like, I could do it as a hobby back then, you couldn't even make money off like it was, like Google AdSense, like you'd put this ad up, and like, it was in the way, and everybody hated it. And at the end of the year, at the end of the month, like Google sent you $43 I'm, like, what am I doing? Like I'll go Panhandle $43 if I try hard enough. No, right? I wouldn't do that anyway. The podcast is so much work that I had to start taking ads. Now, it's not my fault. It's popular. Like, like, you know, like, I
Speaker 1 1:02:13
mean, like, people are like, Oh, my God, there's so many ads. Well, yeah, it's really popular. And, like, and, but I still won't put more than three ads on an episode. You know, how many people would? You know? How many people would stack that money? Uh, not me. I stopped at three. I turned three people down this month. All they have is money in their hand and they want to buy ads. I'm like, I'm sorry, I can't put more ads in the podcast. It'll Yeah, right. Anyway,
Scott Benner 1:02:36
ignore that part of the good nature person I am. Like, skip right to the apart where you say you're pushing carbs on people. I'm like, I don't, I don't even tell people how to eat. If you put up a picture of a cinnamon bun in my group and say, how many carbs do you think this is? I'm the crazy person who lets people answer you and go, I don't know. It seems like it might be this many, right? Like, what they want is for me to say you're a horrible person. You shouldn't eat like that, and you're, you're poisoning your kid, and die, die, die, and you should like they just want, they want to admonish people. They want to admonish people they don't agree with. But the other thing
Tricia 1:03:10
is that they don't understand that for kids. And I'm just, I'm I'm interrupting, and I love it, but they don't understand that for kids, especially, I mean, I work with kids every day, right? So kids, in my opinion, if you tell them how to eat, they're going to do the opposite at some point, and they need to know how to cover it, no matter how they go, right? So, and that's what you do. You teach them how to cover it. You know,
Scott Benner 1:03:35
I don't even get into half of those posts like people do it, I don't have to.
Tricia 1:03:42
I could say you, I mean, yeah, Trisha, you're with
Scott Benner 1:03:45
me. Don't worry. You're doing good. And, like, so, like, it's the diabetes equivalent of religion in in so much as that. Like, it's like, this is the rule. Don't break the rule. And I would point out to those people, if we can, like, you know, make the comparison. How does it go when you tell kids, for example, don't have sex till you're married, they're gonna
Tricia 1:04:06
go out and find somebody have sex with.
Speaker 1 1:04:10
Forget kids. How about like, how about people? You think people do well, being told not to do something, and just because you have the answer that worked for you, which, by the way, would work for a lot of people. I'm not also you don't hear me discounting it. Less insulin, fewer lows, fewer lows, fewer scary incidents, fewer times you got to correct with food, fewer times you might get high again. Listen, law of low, law of average, no low numbers, whatever they say they're like, it's hard to argue with like, and you wouldn't catch me arguing with it. I understand it, but you can't just say to people, I found the right way now you do it. That's a cult, right? Like people have what they call autonomy, and they can do whatever they want. And in a world where some of them might have a cinnamon bun, should we really just write them off? Why don't we help them understand how to Bolus for it? Right? Like me. Me, they'll come to the rest of it later, but this is all wasted Trisha, because they're not listening to this podcast. Because if they did, they probably agree with me. Probably they just vilify me so that they can get into one of their DJ battles where they're like,
Scott Benner 1:05:14
you know the guy over at 97 five, he's an idiot. We're the good ones. And then, like it's a it's a false war. It's a one sided false war that they do to try to keep their people feeling like they're on the right side. And what I'm telling them is, and please be clear. Don't drag me into your one sided false war, right? Okay? Because I'll fight back and and you won't just be in this little fun game where you bad mouth me, and you hold on to a couple people in your little Facebook group that nobody's a part of. And I didn't mean to sound um elitist there, but my Facebook group has 50,000 people in it. It gains 150 new people every three days, and yours gets three posts a day, absolutely. So yeah, yeah. Trisha, do you know how many mine gets?
Tricia 1:05:59
I couldn't even count. I don't know. 125
Scott Benner 1:06:03
a day. 8000 like hearts and comments every 24 hours. Do you know the down hours of the group? There are none, because you're working people in there. 20, God damn. Who says that? What's one of that guy who yells worldwide all the time in his songs? Well, what's his name, though? Who
Tricia 1:06:19
is it? Who is it?
Scott Benner 1:06:20
He says his name on. DJ, no wait, no, no, no, no, no, no. DJ, Khaled, not worldwide. Mr. Worldwide. Mr. Worldwide is, um, I'm bad at you. You're not into this, this, I understand. You're very with the with the dogs. You're a lot of your time is taken up, all right. Mr. Ah, how did I not know this? Pit bull?
Tricia 1:06:41
Oh, there you go. I should have known that, right? Oh, my God.
Scott Benner 1:06:45
Trisha, what are we gonna call the episode? Pit Bull?
Tricia 1:06:48
There you go. Pit Bull. We're
Scott Benner 1:06:50
all done. All done. That's it. Take a box. We're finished. Okay, that's it. Also it's a skill and a talent to take completely unrelated things, make them connect to each other, and wrap them up tightly in an hour and 10 minutes and Oh, my God, I'm so good at this. So anyway, my point to those people would be, if you don't like what I'm saying, fair enough you go say your thing, and all the people who agree with you will follow. And what I'm trying to tell you is, is that my podcast has about 20 million downloads and 50,000 active users in its Facebook group, and your thing looks like the people I don't know like nothing like it looks like a tiny percentage of the people that I that I interact with. And keep a bigger picture here I barely interact with a percentage of people who have diabetes, right, right? Like I reach a pitiful percentage of people with type one diabetes. Imagine what you're reaching. No one. It's you and your five lunatic friends, Jesus Christ, speaking of jerking each other off. You know what I mean, Trisha, look at me. I hear you and pulled it together again. God, damn it, my references are tight as hell today. Damn, God, damn I ought to get paid for this. Oh, wait. Oh, wait, I do. All right, if I rubbed it in long enough you think they got it, they got it. I
Tricia 1:08:16
hope they got it. Yeah, you know, Can
Scott Benner 1:08:17
I quote? Will Smith go for it. It seems wrong, but keep my daughter's name out of your mother mouth. There you go. How's that? That's good. That's good. All right, we're having a good time here Trisha. What did we miss? Anything you're like? Please don't drag me into this. I always feel bad for the people who come on On days like this.
Tricia 1:08:37
Well, I'll be honest, because I knew something was going on. Like, before I logged in, I saw that you had posted, just a really long post, and I didn't have time to read it, you know what I mean? I was like, oh boy, it's not gonna be okay for this podcast. And you were great, so don't worry about it. It was fine.
Scott Benner 1:08:51
Oh no, trust me, it gave me good energy. They don't understand how I work. This was good for me. Yeah, you don't want to, like, I would listen. Let me be clear. I grew up poorly, okay? I was not parented. Well, I grew up outside of Philadelphia. Don't with me. I have a gear. You don't have, okay, like, there, that's it. Like, I'm not gonna hurt anybody but, and I'm not gonna defame anybody or slander anybody, but I got your words, and I'm not afraid, so be real careful, is all I'm saying. Like, because if I get pushed over that line, Tricia, I'm gonna tell you right now, I'm gonna go into attack mode, and then it ain't gonna stop. And then you're gonna find out what happens when people who all feel like this podcast has saved their life think you're upset and treating me poorly, right? I've seen it happen before. I want to say this. This isn't a This isn't what's the word I'm looking for. This is not a threat. I've literally seen this happen before. There was this time before I had a Facebook group where someone asked a question in a Facebook group, and I happened to be up one morning and I saw it, and I popped in and I said. Like, Oh, you know about what I said. It doesn't matter anymore. Like, I gave what I thought was my answer, and at the end of it, I said, like, you know, if this didn't make sense or anything, like, let me know, you know, I'll see if I can be more clear. And I was like, the admin banned me off of the comments because at the end I said, like, you know, ask me if you have any follow ups. I think they thought I was asking them to like DM me or something, which I even as a Facebook owner now, yeah, I understand, right? Yeah. So this person just bans me from the group, and I'm like, I don't realize that, because I'm not incessantly checking the group. I just I answered this person, right? Like a half an hour later, I get a message from somebody online, like, they kicked you out of that Facebook group. And I was like, oh, that's crazy. I wonder why that happened. You know, this has got to be like, I don't know. This has got to be 510, years ago. It's longer. It's it's got to be 10 years ago, maybe, maybe before the podcast even, right? And I was like, Oh, I responded the person. I said, That's very nice of you. I don't know what happened, but obviously they have a reason. Like, I just, I'm like, whatever. Like, I don't care. And I said, But you know, thanks for letting me know. I swear to you, I didn't say any more than that. And this is back just when I had a blog, okay, 45 minutes later, I'm not lying to you. I get another DM through Facebook. Do you know who it is? The owners of it's the admin of the group that kicked that kicked me out. And this note says, I wish I had it says, I'm so sorry that my other, like, co admin or something, didn't realize who you were and kicked you out. I'm like, who am I? I'm like, nobody. Like, I don't know what you're talking about. I'm like, and I'm like, what? Like, so I'm looking at this, like, rambling apology, right? I'm like, where is this coming from? Like, who even cares? And so I messaged the person back, and I'm like, Listen, I'm not upset. I honestly didn't even realize I was kicked out of your group till, like, I don't know, 1520 minutes ago, when someone sent me a note, and I just said to them, well, you must have had a reason, because I'm not crazy. And so, like, you know? And I was like, I'm like, I don't know what you're talking about. And she gets back to me, she goes, Oh my God, thank you so much. Would you call me? I'm like, I don't know you, but whatever. So I call the lady. She's lovely and everything, but she's in a panic. And I'm like, what's wrong? And she said, I'm gonna let you back in the group. Can you please stop what's happening? And I'm like,
Tricia 1:12:20
I don't understand what's happening. I
Scott Benner 1:12:22
don't, right? Yeah, I'm like, what's happening? And she goes, your people, they're rioting. And I was like, what? So I'm like, Okay, I guess I'm like, I'm like, Ari, like, I don't want anything bad to happen to your little Facebook group, you know. So anyways, she lets me back in and holy Trisha. All I saw were people are like, you don't know what that guy did for me. Oh, like, like, it was a lot of, right? He saved me, he saved my kid, he saved my a 1c he taught me to do. This was when I was blogging and and I was like, Oh my God, look how. Like, it's misguided. And I put every I was like, Hey everybody, Hi. It's me calm down. I was like, so I did. I asked everybody. I'm like, Look, you guys are very kind to come to my you know, my rescue here. I didn't need rescuing, but I appreciate it. And please, like this, it was just a mistake. And this lovely lady runs this nice group, like, please don't, please don't try. Don't trash your group. And everybody was like, oh, sorry, no problem. And they all backed out on they took out their bubble, and it all went right. My point in telling you that story, which I have never told anywhere before, Trisha, you were the only person right now on the face of the earth that knows this story, besides myself and probably my wife. But
Tricia 1:13:39
Well, now I feel good, right?
Scott Benner 1:13:40
Well, you should, but that was back before I had 20 million podcasts down right, right? I'm saying, if I put up the little picture of what your shit fucking face said, and people can read it for themselves, I don't have to describe it. I can just go look, there's a person talking about me out in the world, and I don't think that's right, and put it up there like that, it will not stop you will spend your life defending yourself absolutely or running Absolutely. It's not a threat. I'm just telling you it's gonna happen because I've seen it happen before. And trust me, the people who are listening right now are like, let's and go, Scott and I'm the only one holding them back, right? Just so like, yeah, that's all. No, that
Tricia 1:14:25
makes sense, because you have, because you have helped so many people. And why would they attack your child with lies? It just, I mean, I'm floored at that. So sign me up for the group. When? When do we go, like, you know? Well,
Scott Benner 1:14:40
you know what the answer is, though, Trisha, the thing they're selling, not a lot of people are buying it, right, and that's probably incredibly upsetting to them. Can I now move to the other side of the courtroom? Yeah, try to imagine. You struggled your whole life with your diabetes, right? You could never figure out what was happening. Four CGMS. You just couldn't get it straight. Every time you ate, your blood sugar shot up. You felt terrible. It took hours to come down. You crashed. You got low. Your family's calling an ambulance for you. You're having a seizure. It's happening over and over and over again, and one day you say to yourself, I'm just gonna stop eating carbs. And everything just levels out. And your a 1c comes into the fives. There's no more lows, no more highs. You get that, like, low carb, like energy that people talk about after the I think there's like a flu that comes, some people say, and then the energy comes, right? Yeah, I've been low carb before. I know what it feels like. You get this, like, you feel good, you know? And like, and so now what happened? You were in this horrible place. You thought you were gonna die, and now you're in this beautiful place, and you found you think you've got the answer, yep. And then what happens? Now it's religion. Now you're proselytizing, and now anybody who doesn't listen to you doesn't understand. They don't know, you know the gospel. You're gonna shove it down their throat. And if they don't take it, then they don't deserve to be here on this beautiful planet with the rest of you who understand. And I guarantee you, if one of them heard that, one of the and I don't mean by the way, I want to be super clear. I don't mean people who eat low carb. I mean six lunatics. Okay, no,
Tricia 1:16:11
you mean these, these people who are running that little group, these specific
Scott Benner 1:16:15
people, is who I'm talking Yeah, if they heard that right now, they wouldn't see themselves in that statement, but from me to you and to them, I guess if they're listening, everyone sees you that way except yourself, and the ones who see me the way you do are just you. So what does that tell you when a handful of people have an idea that so many other people don't hold and so many other people see you as the problem. But try really, really hard not to condemn you. I watch them all the time. People hold their tongues and not say anything, or they'll send me a note. They're like, this lady's being very rude, or this guy's been like, he's being crazy to people like, Can you ask him just to be kind? That's all we do, by the way, is just say, Hey, can you please be kind? That's it. They don't see that as being unkind. They see it as saving your life. It's my interpretation. I could be wrong. Okay, they see it as saving your life. And then that's it. And they jump and they jump and they attack and they attack. So if somebody doesn't want you to save their life, just say, thank you and move on. You don't have to run over them with the boat, because they won't grab the floaty, like, Jesus Christ, like, I sorry, this has been dear. Oh, no, you're
Tricia 1:17:27
fine. I am glad you were able to share. I'm a counselor, remember? So this is natural. Oh, I
Scott Benner 1:17:33
do need to get this off my back. Yeah,
Tricia 1:17:35
absolutely. I mean, that's good. I'm not an Erica, but I am a Trisha, so they'll keep going. You're fine. You like Erica. She's
Scott Benner 1:17:42
good, right?
Tricia 1:17:42
I do? I do. Yeah, she's great, cool. She's great, cool, right
Scott Benner 1:17:45
now, Erica's like, don't bring my name up. Right now. What the
Tricia 1:17:49
You don't Erica. I'm passing him off to you when I get off this call. Okay,
Scott Benner 1:17:51
well, I will remind you the way Erica reminds me all the time, Scott, I am not your therapist. Oh, my God, it's so funny. She's always like, Scott, I'm not your friend. I'm like, No, I know. I'm not. I know. So funny. All right. Well, listen, you're terrific. I'm I've monopolized your time, and I feel badly. No,
Tricia 1:18:14
you have it. It's, it's like talking to a friend, right?
Scott Benner 1:18:18
And it's very nice you to be out there helping those kids. Seriously?
Tricia 1:18:22
Oh, thanks. They're, you know, they're part of the community, right?
Scott Benner 1:18:26
I hope that four people don't decide that you're a scourge and come after you by making fun of your dogs. You
Tricia 1:18:32
know, it's fine, you would. You. You know how people you know how you have those people who are their little zealots and their little group and all that. There's people like that about dogs too, but it's okay. All right,
Scott Benner 1:18:44
by the way, I've learned this year, this is fascinating. May I I go on a little longer? You don't mind keep talking. You're the
Tricia 1:18:50
one who's hungry and who's actually, that's probably part
Scott Benner 1:18:54
of the problem right now, I am really hungry one second. Oh, wow. How can I be so hungry? I was like, Oh, I know how. Because my GOP gets shot on Saturdays. So it's getting towards the end of the weekend. It's almost there. Yeah, about eight months ago. Mike is a long story. I'm not going to give you the whole thing. My kids got me a chameleon. I I have heard that, yes, wanted one my whole life. Never told anybody brought it up. Kids jumped into action at Christmas time. I think my wife pushed them. I think, honestly, they would have not done anything I had my wife not been like, go to that place and buy this thing, right? Turns out, and I knew this, but they didn't. They're much more difficult to take care of than you might expect. And so I had to literally deep dive into their care, because this thing wasn't going to live long if I didn't understand ins and outs of a lot of different aspects of it, right? And so at first I don't know what to do. I'm like, where am I gonna learn about this? Like, you know what I mean? And then suddenly I realized there's gotta be somebody out there who's me, but for chameleons, like, right? If I'm me for diabetes, is there probably not a me for chameleons, like, like, Absolutely. Go find the Juicebox podcast. For chameleons. And you want to know something, there is one. And I found a lovely man who puts a ton of time and attention into passing the good information that he believes worked for him out to other people. And I thought, Oh, my God, it's even the way he talks about it like. He doesn't say this is right. He says, here's what I did, here's the outcomes I had. And I'm like, my god, he's me, like he's literally doing what I'm doing. And then I got to watch as some people came after him for changing, like, ideas about husbandry for a chameleon. And I can use that word with you, because you have dogs, and you know the word means. In any other scenario, I would not say the word husbandry, because I think it would make me sound like a douche bag. But between you and I,
Tricia 1:20:48
okay, but when we're talking animals, it's all good. Well, in all you know
Scott Benner 1:20:51
what I mean, feels like I'm a little too in the cold when I start using the words and so like and this man, you know, not knowing me, having never met me, gave me every piece of information I needed so that I could go through it and find a good, capable way of taking care of this chameleon. And when I got done, I thought, Oh, my God, I this is what I do diabetes for people like I lay out all my ideas. You pick from them, which you like, what works for you exactly, and then you make it work, even though I'm that kind of, like, clear about it, like, I don't care what you do, I'm not gonna tell you how to eat. I'm not gonna tell you what to do. You know, the you need as much insulin as you need. Like, I'm not arguing with you about anything about your life, right? I help people with their mental health, like, like, F like, I'm a full service Stop and Shop. You know what? I mean, you are. And I look up at the guy, and here he is trying to help people understand a better way to hydrate their chameleons. And a small group of people treat him like he's committing a war crime. And I'm like, Oh my God, those are low carbs, and not just people. And again, I want to be really clear. I think if you eat low carbon, you're doing well with diabetes. Like, God bless you. I think if you're doing that and you're online, beating people over the head with it and making disparaging lies about their daughter and everything else that comes with it, well then I think you're an asshole. I want to be very clear, right? Like, and so
Tricia 1:22:18
absolutely, and it's like that. It's like that, no matter what you know. I mean, like, it goes back to what you said at the very beginning. If you were Omnipod, why do you think tea slim for your kid? I think it's that I don't push the Omnipod too much. You're trying
Scott Benner 1:22:30
to be a reasonable, balanced person. Isn't that interesting? Yeah. But anyway, there it was. I was like, Oh my God, this man and I are doing the same exact thing in two completely different places. We're having the same exact outcomes, as far as success, and we're having the same exact troubles, as far as outsiders who are angry with us for reasons that really just seem it's because we're saying something that's opposite of what they hold very true. Not that I didn't know this already, Trisha, but then it just really hit me. I was like, oh my god, this is just a human problem. This is just what happens. It's got nothing to do with chameleons or diabetes percent or a low carb or Apple versus Android. It's got nothing to do with any of that. This is just how people's brains work.
Tricia 1:23:13
Fascinating. No, it is. No, it is, because I think when people find something that works for them, some people like you can understand just because it works for you, it might not work for somebody else, like you understand that, but I think a lot of people haven't reached that point where they can understand that. Like, just because it works for me doesn't mean that there's not another way to do it. It's like when you teach kids math, like, I hate new math. I'll just say that I can't do new math. I can't do what they're teaching these little children nowadays. I'm a very old school math person, but for the kids where it works for Okay, great, we still got the same answer, right? We still got five or whatever, right? What's it matter? Right? Why is it why does it matter how we got there, as long as we're both in a good spot with what we got. Yes,
Scott Benner 1:24:01
see you, and I agree. It doesn't matter how we get there, it's just as long as everybody's okay. All I want from people is for them to be happy and healthy. That's it. However they can get to that, I think is terrific. If I'm not the pathway to that for them, then I did my best, and I'm sorry it didn't work for you. Go. Go go find something else. Go
Tricia 1:24:21
find somebody who you can no
Scott Benner 1:24:23
hard feelings. Learn from. Yeah, no hard feelings. The other way of thinking about it, and I know that this feels like very specific to diabetes, but it's really not. It's just very specific to some people, like some people fall into one category where I don't know, like, the way I see myself is I kind of felt like a caregivers mentality. And I'm very open, and I don't care what I just I think whatever works for you works for you. And I think there are some people who still have that caregiver mentality, but they're very stuck on this is the way, right. And then I do think there are also, like, another section of people who are just trying to be powerful or famous in a space. Or something like that, and they're just, they don't care what they say, as long as it gets clicks and likes and some company notices and gives them a job one day. Like, like, you know what I mean? Like, where they can make some money off it's selling their coaching or whatever it is they're trying to do. I think there are times when people look at me and they're pissed, because I found a way to say, everyone's welcome. I don't care what you do. I don't want you to fight with each other, and I pay my bills with it, right? And they're out there and they can't figure out jealousy
Tricia 1:25:26
out there. I think for some people with you, because they can't do what you're doing, it's distasteful
Scott Benner 1:25:31
if I say it, but I do think on some level that that has to be true. You know
Tricia 1:25:36
what I mean? This is a bad comparison, but in I've learned more this year. Like I will say, like I have. I currently have a great endocrinologist who is willing to kind of let me care for myself, I guess I would say, and she just writes my scripts, and is there if I need her type of thing? Yeah. I was in an argument with one of the district nurses, who was like, if a kid goes low, they need 15 grams of carbs. And I said, But if one of my kids on a pump, on an automated pump, is at 70, I don't care what the doctor's orders say, if I give him 15 grams of carbs, he's going to be up to 180 in half an hour, 45 minutes. Because he doesn't need the 15 grams because the pump shut his insulin off, you know? But, like, Yeah, but she can't get it out of her head. That, you know, the rule I was taught in 1980 was 15 grams. Wait 15 minutes, 15 you know that, that whole rule thing, right? Right? Medical people fell, yeah. And so you have, you know, so you get it in every aspect. You have some doctors who, they're never going to change that medical plan. It's always going to say 15 grams of carbs the minute that kid hits 70, right? Not paying attention to the fact that it's 70 with a straight arrow, and it's been 70 for three hours, and the kid is fine, right? Yeah. Like,
Scott Benner 1:26:49
and even, even at that, like, even though you're no, you're gonna run into that. I was interviewing somebody yesterday, and lovely person, like, really lovely. And they were stuck on this one idea. And they were like, I don't understand why people do this. And I kept saying, like, why does it matter? Like, why do you need to understand? Like, it's working for them? Like, she's like, well, it's not and I'm like, Well, okay, then it's not your business. You know what I mean? Like, you did the right thing, you did the Good Samaritan thing, it didn't work out. And, like, it's not your job. If you can't let go of that, that's your problem, right? Not theirs. Like, right? You're not Jesus, and you're not here to, like, save everybody, and it's, it's not your job, and that you've you did the nice, good samaritan thing. You said, Hey, I think your tire is going flat, and they gave you the finger. And, fair enough. Okay, like now that parks over, you don't drive after him for 25 miles yelling out the window, you're gonna die. Your tires flat, right? Yeah, that's crazy. Okay. Anyway, don't be crazy. Just Oh, that ain't gonna help anybody.
Tricia 1:27:57
The people who are crazy are gonna be crazy, no matter if you tell them that too. Okay, yeah,
Scott Benner 1:28:01
I just realized that that wasn't gonna like, fix the whole thing. It's like, if it's like, I'd be like, you have anxiety. Could you stop it? No, oh yeah, it doesn't work that way. I understand it doesn't work that way. But here's the end result. I'm a nice, kind, measured person, but I didn't grow up. Well, you don't want to drag me into this, right? I will fight really, really hard, and you won't like how it goes. And if you think, Oh no, I can beat you, Scott, I want you to remember that over 100 people have tried to start a diabetes podcast since I started 110 years ago, and about five of them still exist, and nobody listens to them. To this one. Okay, I will win. Trust me, I've got a real competition problem, so I grew up real broke, don't you worry. And on, on top of everything else, just to be super serious for a second thing you're saying, it's not even true. I mean, I guess if you said something and it was true, I might, I'd understand. But like, Why do you have to lie to make your point? Like, just make your point a different way by telling the truth. It's not that hard. I mean, listen to me for the last half an hour, I can be an asshole. Just say that. Just say, like, I don't know, I listen to the guy's pocket it seems like a dick. Like they're fine. That's your opinion. Good enough. Like, there you go. Why you got to say something that's untrue and drag my kid into it?
Tricia 1:29:23
I mean, because, honestly, like when, when you said, I listened to everything you said. Don't get me wrong, but my brain keeps going back to, you're picking on a kid with a lie. Like, that's that's the main point to me. You're picking on a kid with a lie. Yeah, that's wrong, you know, and
Scott Benner 1:29:41
she didn't say it, by the way, and it's not a thing. She said it's a thing. I don't I'm trying not to be too specific with it, because, believe it or not, what I'm actually doing Trisha is trying to make it so that you can't tell who it is that said what, because I don't want to identify them. I'm still defending that fcking asshole. Right now, you're still trying to be nice. Yeah, you know, I just said what you said, then people would know it was you. And then floodgates. And I'm not doing that. And by the way, anybody who's listening to me right now don't do anything, please, like, just be cool. I'm cool. Ducks back. We're all good. You know what I mean? Well,
Tricia 1:30:17
by the time you play this, it'll be six months from now, and they'll have trouble finding the post
Scott Benner 1:30:21
anyway. So, yeah, they're gonna remember. People got long memories. This is true, not me. I'm gonna forget this in like 15 minutes. I swear to God, next week, someone's gonna say to me, if you sent me a note a week from now and said, Do you remember that thing you were all upset about last week, I'd be like, I'm not 100%
Unknown Speaker 1:30:40
sure what you're talking about. I
Scott Benner 1:30:42
anyway, that's my own personal health. All right, I had to pay extra for this one because I went on so long in editing. So, all
Tricia 1:30:49
right, Trisha, don't worry about I was just trying to listen. Scott, I
Scott Benner 1:30:53
appreciate it. Listener today, thank you. I was a good listener. In the middle, you were very smart. At the end, you you
Tricia 1:30:59
were, we were both good listeners. Yeah, good. I
Scott Benner 1:31:01
just talk a lot.
Tricia 1:31:04
That's okay. You need it too, for sure, you're
Scott Benner 1:31:06
so nice. All right, hold on a second. I want to be friends with you. Bye. Bye.
A huge thanks to Omnipod, not just my longest sponsor, but my first one. Omnipod.com/juicebox if you love the podcast and you love tubeless insulin pumps, this link is for you. Omnipod.com/juice box. The weather outside might be frightening, but you do not need to be uncomfortable. Go to cozy earth.com. Use the offer code juice box at checkout. Save 40% your pocketbook will be comfortable. You remember all your bits and pieces will be comfortable too, because they'll be covered with comfortable, wonderful clothing, towels, sheets and accessories. Cozy earth.com, use the offer code juice box at checkout. I just realized I said the weather outside might be frightening, but I should have said frightful, because I was trying to do that song, that Christmas song, the weather out, you know what I mean. Sorry. Hey, thanks for listening all the way to the end. I really appreciate your loyalty and listenership. Thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox podcast. The episode you just heard was professionally edited by wrong way recording, wrongwayrecording.com you.
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