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Scott Benner 0:00
Hello friends, and welcome to episode 639 of the Juicebox Podcast.

Nicole is on the show today to tell her story. She is a registered nurse who was diagnosed with type one diabetes. During the pandemic. She learned a lot about what hospitals and nurses know about diabetes, and a lot about what she thought she knew. Get ready to have fun with Nicole. She's really wonderful. Please remember, while you're listening that nothing you hear on the Juicebox Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise, always consult a physician before making any changes to your health care plan or becoming old with insulin. Are you a type one to like Nicole? Do you live in the United States? Are you the caregiver of a type one? Who is a US resident if you are, to my mind is that good news? Because that makes you eligible to take the survey AT T one D exchange.org. Forward slash juice box. The survey is quick and simple and easy. And it helps people with type one diabetes T one D exchange.org. Forward slash juice box. This episode of The Juicebox Podcast is brought to you by Omni pod makers of the Omni pod dash and the Omni pod promise. Learn more today at Omni pod.com. Forward slash Juicebox. Podcast is also sponsored by touched by type one. There are a diabetes organization out there doing good work for people with type one. And all they want is for you to check them out. They're are touched by type one.org. And they're on Instagram and Facebook. This is going to test my skills today. I'll tell you that much.

Nicole 2:08
Yeah, I bet it sounds like you've had an overwhelming last 24 hours. Yeah,

Scott Benner 2:13
yeah, I kinda have. Oh, my God. I am. Or you're a nurse, right? Yeah, I'm

Nicole 2:20
a registered nurse.

Scott Benner 2:21
Yeah. Have you ever worked in a hospital setting? Yeah, I

Nicole 2:24
did up until my diagnosis. So I had 15 years at our local hospital here.

Scott Benner 2:30
Wow. So we're not recording yet. But you know, I just, I mean, I just dropped my mom off at her at her apartment and watched her barely be able to get into bed and just kind of flopped down. But it was, you know, and I call you sent a message to my brothers. And I said, Listen, we have to talk because I don't think like if if things stay like this, like mom can take care of herself.

Nicole 2:57
Exactly. Exactly. Yeah. And even just the basic of bladder infections is takes so much out of the elderly. Yeah.

Scott Benner 3:06
No, yeah. It's fascinating. It really isn't. And, and she's, you know, she was getting by before, but now if she doesn't get hungry or doesn't remember to keep drinking, then she just lapses right back into into the same problem again. Exactly. So it's a it's really something and she didn't my mom never like, you know, my mom and dad didn't exactly save money and take good care of themselves. And now she doesn't have any money. So she's looking at basically going to a place, you know, whatever place will accept, you know, her Social Security check in exchange for living there, basically.

Nicole 3:43
Yeah, exactly. I was wondering how that works in the States, because of course, our medical systems are somewhat different here in Canada. But yeah, we do have government funded care homes here in Canada as well. And then otherwise, the ones you pay for are extremely expensive. They're they're minimum. $5,000 a month.

Scott Benner 4:07
Yeah. Right. Yeah. I don't know who's paying for that. So yeah, it's it's certainly not her, you know? Yeah. You're just like, wow, this is crazy. And not only that, but you start looking at her age, and you're doing the math, and you're like, Oh, this is it. This is the last few years of her life. Oh, you know, it just it just feels that way. And yeah. And I'm sure it's possible, she could just pop back up a week from now and be like, I feel better.

Nicole 4:32
But definitely, it's definitely possible.

Scott Benner 4:35
Yeah, at the moment, it's just, I don't know, but a side of her. It made me feel like, oh, hell. First of all, I've always seen life as like a group of people in a line standing at a cliff. And just, you know, like, one goes off like a lemming and you're like, I'm one person closer to having a cliff. You know, my mom was the last person in front of me So,

Nicole 5:00
yeah, totally. That's, that's an interesting way of looking at it. But yeah, I guess it's very true.

Scott Benner 5:06
Like, oh my god, I'm next. And I said to my wife this morning, I was like, so basically, your childhood is just bull. Like, you know, when you're by the time you get to a certain age, you don't even remember being a kid. It's almost meaningless. And like I said, that's like a proving ground situation. You find out if you're strong enough to stay alive, and you know, you're not going to cry all the time, or, you know, drop dead from appendicitis now, okay, I'm in my 20s. I said, You bet. Yeah, you basically have from like, 25 When your brain really solidifies to maybe 45 The first time you think, why does my knee hurt for no reason? Exactly. That's like your whole life right there. 25 To 40

Nicole 5:44
It is. Yeah. Yeah, I'm getting to that point. I just turned 38. And yeah, it's like, wow, I'm kind of achy. When it rains. That's, that's a new sensation.

Scott Benner 5:55
Yeah. So I'm, I'm my assumption. And by the way, now, I've realized I'm probably leaving all this in the podcast, but that's okay. But um, but now I've realized like, it's the cooking part in the beginning, the living part in the middle and the dying part at the end. You're basically there's 1/3 of your of your life is like really great.

Nicole 6:14
Yeah, and you better make the best of it. Right?

Scott Benner 6:16
Holy Hell, yeah. Yeah. I sit down. I was like, Kelly's, like, what do you think about all this? I said two things. A, we need to retire as soon as possible. Yeah, I was like, MB, we need a suicide pack in case one of us can't take care of ourselves. We've got to decide when it's time to go and, and really agree on it up front, because now I talked to my mom. And I'm like, it's not even like it's not, it's not all her anymore. You know, I mean, like she's older, she slower her body slower, but her mind slower to try to have too much of a deep conversation. You realize like she's just parroting back which what we're talking about sometimes? Yeah, it's

Nicole 6:56
fast. Yeah. It's it's difficult to see your parents hit that stage of life. Like I, you know, my parents are still quite young. But you see that in families of patients I take care of at the hospital. And it's it's a really difficult time. You don't ever want to see your parents like that. And and, and it will come one day.

Scott Benner 7:16
Yeah, if you're lucky. That's the irony. Dammit. This is yeah, this is the best case scenario is you don't

Nicole 7:23
Right. Right. Yeah, exactly. How old is she again?

Scott Benner 7:28
She's 79. Yes, yes. Okay. So, anyway, introduce yourself, and we'll start talking.

Nicole 7:39
Yeah, so um, my name is Nicole, and I live in British Columbia, Canada and a city called Kelowna. And I'm a registered nurse.

Scott Benner 7:51
Oh, God, Nicole, right off the bat. I don't know where the hell you're at. Now, I gotta say British Columbia. That doesn't even sound like yeah, Google Maps that I'm doing it right now. Sure. Oh, you live in Washington State. Just say that.

Nicole 8:08
No, no, I it's it's Canada.

Scott Benner 8:12
I know. But I'm saying it's right there.

Nicole 8:15
Oh, yes. You're very close. Yes. Are you?

Scott Benner 8:18
Are you close to the US? Or are you up more north? More north? Because it to my eye. This corner of this British Columbia? You're almost in Alaska.

Nicole 8:31
I'm pretty far away from Alaska. Okay, so you're not that far up? God? No. All right.

Scott Benner 8:37
So you're like, Canadian, like, not like that upper part like the Yukon. And

Nicole 8:44
well, actually, now that you say that I was born and raised in the Yukon, really. So I did live there until I was 17. And that is very northern and we were an hour and a half away from Alaska. And then when I graduated high school, I got into the nursing program at the University of British Columbia in Kelowna. So then I moved here and I took my training and I never left.

Scott Benner 9:11
You know, when you said you were born in the Yukon, my first thought like the question that popped into my head is how did the lady's vaginas not freeze when they're having a baby? Literally the first thing I thought which is

Nicole 9:25
there is modern medicine. So they do go to the hospital for that but yes, it is very cold there.

Scott Benner 9:30
Yeah, I mean, that thought right there is either the reason why people like this podcast or the reason why people hate me. I don't know the difference but yeah, I think it's why we love you genuinely my first thought like the wooden they like, just like the laybys and like I had a whole like like, the cold air hits it and what's going on the kid is the kids I have a hard time getting out of bed if the ceiling fans on.

Nicole 9:54
Know where I live, it's in wine country and we this summer we had a heatwave of an average temperature of 46 degrees Celsius. You're gonna have to convert that into Fahrenheit for me, but it's very hot.

Scott Benner 10:07
Let's just say this. I have no idea how to convert that. So let me just keep going with my, it was 114 degrees Fahrenheit. Yes. In Canada?

Nicole 10:19
Yes.

Scott Benner 10:20
Did this sled dogs all die? What happened?

Nicole 10:22
That's crazy in the Yukon. They probably did. Yeah. But yeah, it's it was quite intense. And I mean, the seriousness of it is that there were some fatalities because, you know, there are some older homes in Canada that don't have air conditioning. And, you know, there's elderly people that just can't they, they can't manage those temperatures. So yeah, it was it was pretty crazy.

Scott Benner 10:50
Interestingly enough, two things. Are you on wired headphones? Yes. Try not to touch the microphone or let it hit your hair. Okay, sounds good. And the other thing I was gonna say was with older, elderly people, sometimes they don't know they're warm when they're warm. Exactly. That's the biggest problem is they're basically just cooking and they don't realize it until it's too late. Really? Exactly. Yeah. Crazy. I have to say that in the Northeast here of the of the US. I mean, I don't know about the rest of the country because I'm I'm not keeping tabs. But it had to have been one of the wettest summers I've lived through in my memory this year. Like, wow,

Nicole 11:32
and ours was the driest. No kidding. I think. Isn't that interesting?

Scott Benner 11:37
It just rained and rained and rained and wouldn't stop. And it was inches of rain at a time not just like, wow, that's just a storm. Wow. Yeah, that was really that's really interesting. Okay, so yeah, you're born. They're up in the I mean, I'm guessing like the hinterlands is a way to say I don't know, what's your like? Do you live in a tree for the first part of your life? Or how does that work? Igloo? Igloo? Alright, hold on a second. You know, I'm just joking. I love how Canadian you are. You're like, Oh, don't take me seriously. I didn't live in a nuclear i. So oh, there's buildings. I see it with Google.

Nicole 12:15
Yeah, there's, there's a few buildings there for sure.

Scott Benner 12:18
Do you know that when I look down at the map, I learned there's a gulf of California. I was like, Wait,

Unknown Speaker 12:24
I don't think I do that either.

Scott Benner 12:26
Right. You didn't. I mean, nobody knows who there's no one listening. Who knows that everyone understands Gulf of Mexico. It's an obvious thing. But exactly. Apparently, below San Diego. Like California has like a I don't want to say a penis. I don't know what it is. Exactly. There's something sticking down off of California. It's probably another Hold on. I'm gonna Oh, it's Oh, Baja. I know nothing. Okay, so it looks like Baja goes all the way down almost like midway into Mexico. And then there's this Yeah. What are what you knew that?

Nicole 13:01
Well, is that where Cabo San Lucas says maybe

Scott Benner 13:04
braggart? How do you

Nicole 13:07
throw it only because they took a vacation there. Okay.

Scott Benner 13:12
Oh, Cabo site? Yes. It's at the tip of Baja California. Sorry.

Nicole 13:18
That's right. Yeah,

Scott Benner 13:20
no kidding. I know nothing about that. I am fat. I swear to you. I am now looking at the map of the United States at the point where it intersects Mexico, and I feel like I've looked down at my foot and seen a six toe for the first time in my life.

Nicole 13:39
Well, I'm not the greatest with geography, too. But I just I just seemed to know where Cabo San Lucas was. So I lucked out there.

Scott Benner 13:46
Was it a good vacation?

Nicole 13:47
It was an awesome vacation.

Scott Benner 13:49
Well, I mean, you're from the Yukon anywhere with a son. We were probably just like, Oh, we're in heaven. Okay. Yeah. How old? were you when you were diagnosed?

Nicole 13:57
3737.

Scott Benner 13:59
Just last year?

Nicole 14:01
Yeah. So I was old for this diagnosis. For this, like,

Scott Benner 14:05
everyone who's listening who was like, 62, when you were diagnosed is like now. People are just happy. They figured out how to get their podcast player on one more time, right? Yeah. And no, no disrespect to you older people be you know what happens? They changed the operating system and you look at it, you're like, I don't know what this is. You know, why did they move everything? Yeah. So just just last year, so are you let me dig in a little bit. Not that this matters, but I like knowing married children single.

Nicole 14:34
So I have a boyfriend and he's also in health care. He's a respiratory therapist. So he was along for the ride for this whole diagnosis. And we live separately and we have no children. just focused on our careers right now. And yeah,

Scott Benner 14:55
well, that's interesting. So he How long have you been dating prior to the diagnosis?

Nicole 15:00
For about two years, okay,

Scott Benner 15:03
that's not a new relationship, not an old relationship.

Nicole 15:07
Yes, thankfully not new because it might have scared might have scared him away. Yeah,

Scott Benner 15:11
you haven't stopped having sex, but you're still doing it more than once a week. Am I right?

Nicole 15:15
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, there you go. You know, go sleep,

Scott Benner 15:19
right? I got you. Two more years till you're down to hand stuff. And then you just start pretending you can't hear him.

Nicole 15:27
And then you schedule it in, right? Well, every three months.

Scott Benner 15:30
You pretend you didn't hear. I felt like he said, let's watch television.

Nicole 15:36
So I turned over and went to sleep. Yeah, that worked.

Scott Benner 15:39
I didn't notice. Oops, sorry. You've got a couple more years for that. Even. So, a lot of fun coming up. Yeah, yeah. Hand stuff. To descriptive term that really says nothing at the same time.

Nicole 15:53
But says a lot, because everybody knows what that means. Yeah,

Scott Benner 15:56
no, there's there's children listening right now that they're like, Oh, I think I know what that means. Yeah, exactly. And, and don't tell your parents about this, or you're not gonna be able to listen anymore. Just so you know. Yeah. Like, I can't stop now. So you were just diagnosed a year ago. So you like live in you're like, so out of the blue? Or was this something you've been waiting for?

Nicole 16:16
You know, it's really interesting, because the reason why I find this so fascinating. I only use that word now looking back, but September 15, will be my diversity, my first diversity. So coming up here. And, you know, I, I hadn't felt well for at least a couple of years. But I always like leading up to the diagnosis, but I always kind of chalked it up to doing shift work. 12 hour shifts aren't for the faint of heart. You really just kind of work, eat and sleep. And then I started losing my hair. And it was it was very slow. But it was continuous. And so I did go to my family physician, explaining that I was tired, I'm losing my hair. And he immediately assumed it was thyroid. So I did go for bloodwork. And my thyroid was actually fine, my iron was low, so he just chalked it up to that. Okay, I started on iron supplements, and basically called it a day. And I do have to say that I have the most insane needle phobia. So to just go for bloodwork is it's still not an easy thing, but it really was not an easy thing back then. So to do a bunch of follow up lab work, I wasn't really that interested in I thought, okay, my irons low, I'll just take the supplements and and I should be fine. But my energy never returned, my hair continued to be brittle, and, and, and thinning for sure. And so I just kind of left it at that I did get some blood work done in 2018. And it was more because I thought I'm getting a little bit older and I'm in health care, I know it's good to have a baseline of all of your, you know, lab values. So I did go and get bloodwork at that time. And my fasting glucose was 8.5. So that is I have a conversion graph up here for you. Thank you. That's 153.

Scott Benner 18:31
Okay, that's

Nicole 18:32
so it was elevated for sure. And when my family doctor called me to follow up on that I had said, Well, you know, my extreme stress for for lab work. And I also had popped a piece of gum before I went because I was fasting and my mouth was dry. So we kind of both agreed that it was because of that. And I never was followed up on and I think that the golden rule of the lab work that is out of the normal range is to repeat it. It really should have been repeated and and it wasn't and I didn't mind that because I I really don't like needles. So that brings me to the start of the pandemic. And of course, that was an extremely stressful time to be in health care and working at the hospital. And I worked on a small medical unit. And we were actually notified one day that our whole unit was just going to close. And we were going to be redeployed to work the COVID ward. So this is when nurses in Italy were dying from COVID because we actually didn't know what PPE required. We didn't know the severity of COVID So all we knew here in Canada was in Italy, nurses and healthcare professionals were dying from COVID I see. So the stress was just extreme.

Scott Benner 20:04
Did you go so every day thinking I'm gonna get I'm gonna die today, or I'm gonna

Nicole 20:09
I thought I was going to die of COVID. I just didn't know when. Okay, so yeah, it was really stressful. Of course, we never ever had any issues with PPE at our hospital. We did conserve our PPE, but we were never denied PPE. So I was very lucky that way. I know, it wasn't like that for everybody in health care at that time. And I six months leading up to September 15, of 2020. Working the COVID Ward, I started to rapidly lose weight. But it's really interesting because again, it's it's so fascinating for me as a registered nurse, how I didn't really pick up on all of these signs. And it was basically there were so many things that were an excuse for what was going on. So I and I and I am pretty healthy. But I decided to really, you know, cut out all fast food, I didn't want to be exposed to people handling my food, increase my water intake, I just I just started to be really healthy, making all of my own food, all of my own bread. But I was rapidly losing weight. And and I just thought it was because I was starting to eat really clean. And of course, I was thirsty, extremely thirsty. But that's because I was wearing a mask all day at work. And and every time you have to go out in public, you're wearing a mask and it makes you feel dry. So you know, and then you feel dry. So you're drinking extra water, and then you're peeing more. So I mean, you know, these are all the symptoms of diabetes, but I would have never, ever thought I had diabetes.

Scott Benner 22:00
You just kept coming up with reasons why it wasn't the parents so many

Nicole 22:03
reasons. Yeah. And, you know, if I wasn't working in a pandemic, with all this extra stress, I think it would have been a little bit more apparent to me. The other thing is being 37. I briefly thought maybe I have type two diabetes, even though I'm very petite. But I have grandpa who has type two diabetes, and I quickly just dismissed that. Like, there's no way I'm, you know, I am a healthy weight. I eat clean, like there's just no way. So over the next few months, I started to kind of write down my symptoms on my notepad in my iPhone and I sat I have to make a doctor's appointment because I am really thin. Like, you know, by the time I was diagnosed, I was down to 104 pounds and my baseline is 120. So anyway, I had all these things written down to talk to my doctor about and I went into work one day, and I couldn't stay awake. And I I was doing everything to stay awake. I was falling asleep during our nursing rounds. And I can't even tell you still to this day, what compelled me to ask my co worker to check my blood sugar, because I hate those finger pokes. So for me to even ask somebody to do that to me. You know, I think I think I knew but I was in denial and and I what I thought was type two diabetes. Because I was craving sugar at this point, I was drinking orange juice from the nursing patient fridge. I was baking and eating all of the baking. My boyfriend wouldn't even know that I was baking. But still losing weight. So I kind of thought it was it was awesome at the time. I could eat whatever I wanted all the sudden and I wasn't gaining weight.

Scott Benner 23:59
Yeah. I'm laughing for how many people I remember have said that to me.

Nicole 24:03
You know? Yeah. And I just still kicking myself. How did I not know? And so, yeah, September 15. Well, actually the 14th I called in sick for work, because I woke up in the morning to get ready for work. And my legs felt like they were literally 100 pounds each. I just couldn't get going. So I ended up calling in sick for that shift. The next day, I felt the same but I forced myself to go into work. And in the afternoon I got my coworker, coworker to check my blood sugar. And let me look at the graph here. It was 504

Scott Benner 24:41
You know, while you were talking I Googled I thought to myself, there's definitely a saying that doctors are the worst patients but I wasn't 100% Sure, saying so then I Googled doctors are it's the second return overrated as the first return which doctors are overrated doctors are the worst patient Doctors are heroes. Doctors aren't scientists. That's what comes up when you when you google doctors are. Because I just kept thinking like, people are listening and thinking, if you don't know Who the hell's gonna know.

Nicole 25:15
Yeah, well, and I'm a registered nurse. But I mean, at the same time, I should know as much about diabetes as a as a general practitioner.

Scott Benner 25:24
Is that really true, though? They don't teach you much about it in school, right?

Nicole 25:27
No, and that's what I wanted to talk about is just this whole process just blew me away as as each step started to take its place in this diagnosis for me, so she checked my blood sugar, and it was 504. And our rule of thumb is to wash your hands and check it again. Yeah,

Scott Benner 25:49
in case you got an entire CocaCola into that test.

Nicole 25:53
At this point, yeah. And I wouldn't have even known that at the time. So

Scott Benner 25:57
I just have to say, it really is you it's that moment. You're just like, Okay, well, obviously, I have diabetes, but let me just wash my hands.

Nicole 26:07
It was, yeah, it really was. And again, I'm thinking type two, type one never crossed my mind. Not even for one second. Because I was eating so much baking, I was making jugs of orange juice. I don't drink juice, I don't drink pop, normally. And so this craving for sugar was so strong. And, and you know, ultimately, that's why I thought, oh, geez, maybe I've pushed myself into type two diabetes. So we both laughed, she washed my hands, and she rechecked it again. And it was 513. So

Scott Benner 26:48
I'll just watch them 15 more times. Yeah, I really wanted to Oh, and you're in a dangerous situation, going after all those sweets, because eventually you're gonna end up fighting a bear for honey up there, and then you're gonna be too weak for the decay, there's no way you're gonna be able to do it.

Nicole 27:04
That's where I was, you know, when I didn't even know. So I kind of just took a deep breath. And I sat down at our nursing table, and my charge nurse came over and I said, and his name is Scott. And I said, Hey, so my blood sugar's 513. And he kind of said, what? And there was one of my favorite doctors sitting at the table, too. And that doctor looked at me, and he said, Hey, Nicole, do you have diabetes? I said, No. And I kind of laughed, and he looked at me, and he said, You do now?

Scott Benner 27:34
Yeah, I was gonna say, You should have said not for the next two seconds. I don't think but I think I'm going to and Jarrett is yeah, like he Yeah. Yeah. That's your diagnosis, not just the doctor sitting at a desk. That was

Nicole 27:46
it. Yeah. You have diabetes, making what he kind of thought was a joke. But but, I mean, there's no other explanation, really, I mean, except for rare illnesses that would cause your blood sugar to be that high. So my charge nurse said, you know, pack your stuff up, we'll head down to emergency and we'll, we'll get you in. And I said, No, no, no, like, I'll finish my shift. And this, I think this was around three in the afternoon, you know, I have four more hours to go, I'll finish my shift. And I'll just follow up with my family doctor. And he kind of looked at me and he said, you know, give your head a shake, like, something is seriously wrong. We need to go down stairs to emergency. So that's when it all started to kick in. And I lost it. I completely broke down. And my main concern was that I was going to have to get more needles to find out what was going on. Little did I know my whole life would be surrounded by needles very shortly.

Scott Benner 28:47
Yeah, no kidding. You just used an idiom that I've never heard before in my life. What's that? Give your head a shake?

Nicole 28:54
Oh, you've never heard that. Maybe it's a Canadian thing

Scott Benner 28:57
and imperative to reevaluate one's ideas, behaviors or actions or to begin acting or thinking sensibly primarily heard in Canada. Well, there you go. You said I, it's funny. I knew what you meant, right away. But it was one of those things that in my brain, I had to stop listening to you and go keep your head shake. What the hell is she? Oh, I get that. Okay, that I was and then then, then I'm googling because we're being recorded. And I'm gonna bring it up. So yeah, so your first thought, if you recognize, oh, hell, this is really what's happening wasn't about any of the impacts on your life beyond? More people are going to poke me.

Nicole 29:40
Exactly. And anybody who knew me, from the time that I formed memories, I have had a needle phobia. And you know, phobias can be trauma as a young child that you don't really have memories around but it creates these phobias for you. So that's, that's my whole life. I just Thought obviously something happened to me with immunizations as a baby. And, and it had, you know, a long lasting impact on me. But there wasn't, there wasn't ever a scenario where I remembered having a bad needle from something. Okay? I just always had this extreme needle phobia,

Scott Benner 30:17
no trouble giving them to people.

Nicole 30:20
In fact, I was one of the best. So it's very ironic because and and I think I'm more sensitive to the fact that needles aren't fun for anybody. And so I really honed in on that skill as a nurse and NDI. I perfected it for sure.

Scott Benner 30:36
See, working in in that setting. You're poking people in pretty much everywhere, right? Your cat? Yeah, I think people you're you're Yeah, you're starting IVs you're starting all kinds of like, I'm sure you've like I'm sure you've like, gone into someone's neck at some point. Right? Like,

Nicole 30:55
it's Yeah, I haven't gone into someone's neck because that's more critical care. But I mean, everything else. Okay. Yeah, I

Scott Benner 31:03
wanted the next story. Damn it. Yeah. Can we just

Nicole 31:07
I refused the neck IV when I went down to emergency.

Scott Benner 31:11
No, thank you. I'd rather die here. Thank you. Wow, so you get down there? Is it? Um What What am I wondering here? Is it weird for you? Because it's where you work? Like, do you think what's my better question when you're younger and you're in health care? Do you sit there and think oh, God, these things are gonna happen to me maybe one day or do you have this weird feeling like you're not above it but immune to it a little bit? Because you do it?

Nicole 31:42
You know you Yeah, I don't know why I thought I was invincible. But you do you know you eat healthy. You know, I didn't exercise a ton but I definitely didn't lead an unhealthy lifestyle and so I never ever thought I would be diagnosed with a chronic disease ever.

Scott Benner 32:03
How could you you're a nurse like that's the exact

Nicole 32:06
we're we're immune to that

Scott Benner 32:08
makes me think of this 1950s Like magazine ads where doctors are sitting on the corner of their desk in a long coat smoking a cigarette giving you advice you ever see. Yeah, exactly. What you need to do is get some exercise. Yeah. Chesterfield King. Yeah. It's it's very. It's an interesting situation. I really do always wonder that about, about health care workers, like I said to my wife in the past, like, that must be the worst job because you're just surrounded with like, by the Ghost of Christmas Future constantly. Yeah, like, how do you not watch people come in, you know, with different elements, elderly people watching them get older and just wonder, like, I wonder which one of these things is going to happen to me?

Nicole 32:55
Yeah, and I mean, definitely, as I got older, I started my nursing career when I was quite young, you know, starting to approach my late 30s. You You did, unfortunately, see people starting, you know, to have cancer diagnoses. You know, some pretty critical diagnosis happening in their life. And then it it did slowly start getting a little closer to home the older I was getting. But you still don't think it's gonna happen to you?

Scott Benner 33:29
Yeah. Let's be like being like a Formula One racecar driver, and somebody goes into a wall and explodes and you just think, wasn't me? Because I, because how can you not think it's not going to be you at some point?

Nicole 33:43
I know, I know. And I don't know why I ever thought that either. It's not like there's any health issues. Like there's health issues that exist in my family and in my genetics and but you still, you know, maybe it even has nothing to do with being a nurse. You're just that's how you grew up. You You don't ever think something's gonna happen to you. Unless I guess you're a pessimist all the time. But

Scott Benner 34:07
I just I just imagine it's one way or the other that you either sit there thinking like when is the one of these things gonna happen to me or you have that like invincible feeling of like, oh, yeah happened to me. I'm I'm a racecar driver. We don't crash Yeah, crash going to work. Not me. I know how to drive this thing. Yeah, exactly. But our our nurses inherently any healthier than anybody else that you know.

Nicole 34:30
No. So, you know, we're we're your average person. I mean, yeah, we it's, you know, they were not necessarily the healthiest of people just because we're in health care, especially doing shift work just just to know what that exposes you to for chronic diseases later on in your life. You know,

Scott Benner 34:52
your your ability to get type two diabetes pretty significantly. Yes. Yes, shift works better. had for you?

Nicole 35:00
Yes, it's it's extremely bad for you. It's definitely a risk factor for chronic diseases.

Scott Benner 35:07
Yeah, no kidding. So Alright, so now you're there and you're Was it weird being helped by people you like, coworkers?

Nicole 35:15
Yes, there's this the whole thing that I still have trouble. And I've been getting ongoing counseling for this to help process just the diagnosis and everything over the last year. But yeah, I mean, here I am, in my scrubs still laying in a bed as a patient in emergency being told that I've diabetes. And it's just, it's so surreal, I still have not been able to fully process that. Like, just what are the chances that I'm working as a nurse? One minute and the next minute, I'm a patient in a bed at the same hospital?

Scott Benner 35:55
That usually happens like on ER, or Grey's Anatomy. Yeah, like, after walking to your car or something like that, which I think has happened on every medical show I've ever seen in my life. Eventually, they get like, 810 seasons in there. Like we should have the medevac helicopter crash into one of the doctors like if

Nicole 36:14
that's why I can't even watch those shows.

Scott Benner 36:17
You don't think that's real? Everyone's like, wait a minute, hold on. Don't lie to me. Everyone's not having sex in every closet.

Nicole 36:25
No, it's really not happening. Maybe the odd couple of people. But

Scott Benner 36:29
yeah, disappointing as hell. I gotta be honest.

Nicole 36:31
Yes, sorry.

Scott Benner 36:34
Really, yes, it really is disappointing. Before we move forward, I just want to tell people, researchers have found that shift work is linked to an increased risk of heart attacks, ulcers, depression, obesity, high blood pressure, sleep disorders, type two diabetes. I mean, good luck. Your body wants to sleep when the sun's down is

Nicole 36:53
exactly. And plus, they say it shaves about 10 years off of your life as well.

Scott Benner 36:57
Just 10 years. That's great.

Nicole 37:04
We really are giving ourselves to take care of others.

Scott Benner 37:07
But I'm sure you're making like a 8% shift differential. So it's all fine. I mean, the extra $35 a day is probably making a huge difference for you and really changing your life. Definitely. Yeah, right. Right. Yeah. So before we started recording, I don't know how we're gonna do this. But before we were started recording, I was saying to Nicole, in case it doesn't make it to the show. Today is a very strange day for me. Nicole and I are recording very late in the afternoon. We were supposed to do this hours ago, but my mom was in the hospital late last night. And I was with her in the emergency room, which is such a strange thing. Because my wife's like, don't have to record tomorrow. And I looked and I was like, oh my god, I do with a nurse who has type one. And I was like, I spent my whole night in a room with a nurse. I should ask her if she had type one. I mean, I probably could have just gotten this out of the way sooner. But um, Sitacles really nice. She has the day off and she she let this go. But it's in the forefront of my mind obviously, right now health care and, and that thought I had about nurses must be sad, like I had last night, like sitting there and talk to my wife about it this morning when I got up. But it's just a really, really weird timing, like for you know, as far as this goes, and anyway, I was saying to you at the beginning, I was like I was having this existential like crisis this morning speaking to my wife when I got out of bed, and I was like, this is all just bullshit. She's like, she's like, what is it? I'm like, the whole thing. I was like the first 2025 years, I didn't know what I was doing. And I can remember them. I said, my knees been hurting for the last five years, my back is stiff everything. I can't sleep on my stomach anymore, because it makes my lower back hurt. How the hell is that possible? Right? So you know, like, there's these things are happening. You start I don't know, Nicole, you're, you're a little far from it still. But there'll be a moment in your life where you get up, three, four o'clock in the morning to go to the bathroom, and you'll hit the floor and realize that your ankles not articulating the way that it's supposed to. And it takes a good three or four steps to get moving before that works. And I was like, so I said to my wife, and I was like, so your life is just 25 to 45 Like, if you're lucky. Those are the that's the sweet spot. I was like, You're right, like wanna rip off? I mean, really, I sit around like we got to right now like, we got to find a way to retire. I was like, we're done almost. So we're almost dead. What are we doing? She's like, What about the kids pay for college? Student loans, let them do what I did. Struggling Exactly. Yeah, exactly. Meanwhile, I mean, I don't really feel that way. A mean big picture but it is hard not to like you know, see your mom. You know at an age where you're thinking you're still going to be like living a jet setting lifestyle and she's like, because Can someone please bring the sofa closer to me? So I could sit down, you know, like that's a it's not, it doesn't feel you're full of good feelings. But right? Yes, I do want to know more about you being diagnosed. So this can all be about me being overly tired and my mom going into the hospital.

Nicole 40:18
Yeah, I know. That's okay.

Scott Benner 40:19
So what did you learn about what you don't know about diabetes being on the other side of it suddenly.

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Nicole 43:37
everything you know it's just it's it's so incredible. And you know what's even more ironic is that my shift leading up to sorry about the background noise there.

Scott Benner 43:51
The shipping thing was somebody killing a moose outside. Okay, perfect.

Nicole 43:54
No. They're rolling in the big metal garbage bins at my condo building. It always makes such a big noise

Scott Benner 44:02
Please don't ruin the illusion a call. Did you just say a penguin attacked your window or something

Nicole 44:07
like this? And my uglies melting

Scott Benner 44:10
now you look up at a polar bear was trying to break your window with a penguin like it was a Brock Could you say something? Oh, I love there say something fun? Would you please Jesus, but Oh man, that's so funny. The metal cans are coming up to my condo.

Nicole 44:25
It was the sled dog team outside sounds like

Scott Benner 44:27
you live in a completely lovely place. You're ruining the only thing I think about Canada. Alright. So go I'm sorry. Go ahead. You you you know, all of a sudden you're sitting in that bed and someone who by the way I'm imagining five seconds before this you thought of as a really great nurse is all of a sudden showing that she don't know much about what's happening to you.

Nicole 44:47
Yeah, and and you know, when I had the blood work done, and the it was actually a resident who came in to talk to me and said you know you have Diabetes, and you are in severe DKA. And leading up to going down to emergency, I had a young girl who I had just transferred out of ICU up to my medical ward, she was in ICU with DKA. Because she, you know, whatever social factors were going on in her life, she just gave up giving herself her her insulin. So, you know, here, I was questioning her on, on why she did that. And, you know, making sure that we were getting her blood glucose in range and making sure that she had all her insulin and you know, at home when she was ready to be discharged, and that she had everything organized. And all of a sudden, all of a sudden, it's me and DKA, within three hours of having that patient and it's just, I can't even tell you how crazy it is to be on the other side. So quick and, and still still in my nursing scrubs. So the resident comes in and says, I have diabetes. And, and then basically leaves and I'm just a basket case. And my boyfriend had just worked a night shift the night before. So he he was pretty tired. And obviously I phoned him and said you you need to come to the hospital right now. So it did take him a little bit of time to get there because he had to try to wake up and, you know, be safe to drive. And anyway, so the the ICU specialist doctor came in, we call them our intensivist and said, We're going to be transferring you to ICU and it's still every single thing they said to me was just like me, like, I'm going to ICU like normally it's one of my patients and never have being sick or in the hospital a day in my life. It just it was so much to take on. And I said okay, well when am I starting Metformin or glimepiride or, you know, which are medications to treat Type Two diabetes and their tablets, not needles. So he just he looked at me and he just said, you have type one diabetes? And I said, No, I don't. And he said, Nicole, and he knows me. And he said, You have type one diabetes. And it wasn't until the next day that I stopped asking when I could switch from my insulin infusion because they immediately put me on an insulin infusion. When I could switch from that to my Metformin. And the other intensivist just he he was very, very serious. And he said this is type one diabetes, you will be on insulin for the rest of your life. What were you gonna

Scott Benner 47:51
do looking back? Do you know what you were doing? Right then? Were you in shock? Disbelief.

Nicole 47:56
I was in total shock. Yeah, I just I couldn't even process it. I really, really couldn't. And and by the time I got to ICU, my blood sugar was 603. So you know, they, they all told me that if I had gone home that night, living alone, sleeping alone, I probably wouldn't have woken up the next morning, the way things were going

Scott Benner 48:24
and cutting you slack for being in decay. That should have been your first thought when you saw your blood sugar. Your first thought, what would you have done? If I came in there? You tested my blood sugar, and it was 514 I would have called the doctor stat. Yeah, cuz probably this guy here with type one diabetes. And he thinks he's gonna go home, work for more hours and then come back tomorrow.

Nicole 48:51
This is the state of shock, right? Like you're not? Yeah. Yeah, it's just I'm still pretty speechless. It. It's just the way it all happened. And you know, part of counseling was going over how crazy this all was being a nurse. And then like immediately on the flip side, being a patient and you know, the way that I look at it and the way that I've been kind of talking with my counselor with through it is that if I wasn't there that day, it wouldn't have probably worked out as well as it did. Meaning that I could have easily not woken up the next morning

Scott Benner 49:31
that for you were that bit poorly off at that point because that's not the is they want highest you know, blood sugar I've ever heard at diagnosis for certain

Nicole 49:40
definitely mean either. I mean, I've heard of people coming in in the high 40s Which on this graph is 720 or that's that's 40 is 720 Yeah, I've definitely heard of that. So, um, I was really lucky to have caught it when I did and not have gone a couple more days like that even if I was able to stay alert and awake, just the damage that it does, you know?

Scott Benner 50:08
How long were you in your hospital?

Nicole 50:10
So I spent three nights and four days at the hospital. And just one night in ICU, and then transferred

Scott Benner 50:20
to here my questions about that. Were their goals for you? What were their goals for you about your blood sugar? I'm sure they were trying to bring you down slowly to get you stabilized. But yes, but was that all done through IV? Or when did you begin using injections of your own.

Nicole 50:38
So that was all through the IV while I was in ICU, and our rule in Canada here is that you cannot be running IV insulin on a general medical ward because it's a critical medication, especially given through the intravenous. And so within 24 hours, I was transferred up to a medical ward and that infusion was stopped. And, you know, then then became my first dose of insulin. And it was a production I'm not gonna lie. And and that whole night leading up to that I had hourly lab work and hourly glucose testing finger pricks. I definitely reached my maximum level of coping by the next morning and started refusing lab work. Did you really the I did, the needles were so overwhelming to me. That basically was what I was focused on for the first 24 hours if you can, believe it or not, but that's how bad my phobia was. So to have these hourly blood work, was very taxing on my system. And I knew my numbers were coming down, and I knew that they were looking way better. And so I did refuse to two sets of lab work before the intensivist came in that morning. And I just basically told him like, I can't do this. When he told me I have to do this.

Scott Benner 52:13
Did you think when you said I can't do this, did you think I'm just gonna die? That's fine. Or did you think there was another way out of this? Were you bartering? But what was that?

Nicole 52:24
Yeah, you know, I think it was somewhat of a barter because we did come to the conclusion that okay, you know, he said to me, I agree, you're borderline, but your numbers are looking way better. We can probably call you stable. And why don't we do bloodwork every four hours? So I said, deal? Basically, I can handle that. Meanwhile, my boyfriend who works in ICU as a respiratory therapist all the time, it's kind of shaking his head, you know, like, telling me that I'm not the one calling the shots anymore?

Scott Benner 52:59
Yeah. Shut up and let them do it.

Unknown Speaker 53:02
Did you? Yeah, pretty much, you

Scott Benner 53:03
have that feeling like oh, I can still run the show here.

Nicole 53:07
I did feel that a little bit. Just with so many years of nursing, it just was so weird to relinquish control to the people that I worked with to take care of me.

Scott Benner 53:17
So I've said this out loud enough. I'm not scared to say it again. But I've gotten pushback, and I've gotten people to agree with me. I've said that of the great number of parents who are, who are parents of kids with type one that are nurses. Most of them end up being bad at it in the beginning. And I think there's something about the art that there is to giving insulin and that they want it to fall into very strict rules and guidelines. Like almost like I don't know, I can't figure it out completely, but it almost feels like to a nurse diabetes is check, write down the number, count these carbs, make the do the do the math, give the insulin that's diabetes, and then when they see it in their real life where they can actually watch it on a glucose monitor. And they realize it's not going the way they anticipated or that it's not just so I don't want to call it throw away but you know, I imagine if you have a cut and dry Yeah, very cut and dry. Like oh, what gave you your medication? You ate your food. I came back three hours later and your blood sugar was 350 Oh, well, I'll do another mathematical equation. I'll give you more insulin instead of it feeling like Oh god, I'm killing my kid. Or Oh, Jesus, I'm killing myself. Like right there's a there's a disconnect there. And it shines a light pretty brightly. Am I imagining in my thinking on how little emergency medical and I do say hospitals are still emergency right? You're only going to be there for a couple of days. Not long term care. knows about like the real back room of of diabetes and using insulin. I don't think anybody really understands that at all.

Nicole 55:00
No, and this, this is kind of the shock that I went through with for the next few days was and anger was, as a registered nurse how little I knew about type one diabetes. And, you know, I have to say over the last year, of course, I've done so much reflecting. One of the main reasons is because, in my opinion, I didn't take care of very many type one diabetics in my 15 years at the hospital. It was mostly type twos, because type one diabetics have a somewhat immediate effect of not taking care of their blood glucose. Type Two diabetics have a very delayed kind of effect, you know, of losing their limbs and their eyesight and type one diabetics, if, if you give too much insulin, you know, right away, if you don't give enough, you know, right away, type two is it just seems to be much different.

Scott Benner 56:07
So once one set of circumstances comes up on you quickly, and feels pretty dire. And the other one seems like a, like a tale of what might happen to you, because it happens to some people. But everybody gets to have the feeling you had, which isn't won't happen to me, so I'm okay. And then you get to ignore it. Because,

Nicole 56:26
exactly, yeah, yeah. Yeah. So and just to even know, you know, my first few days when I was at home giving insulin, and then I would eat my supper, and then I would get up and clean the dishes and have a severe hypoglycemia. And it was just absolutely shocking to me how much I didn't know about type one diabetes and, and even my type two patients who I would give a large amount of insulin to fast acting insulin, and then they would leave the ward and go for a cigarette smoke outside the hospital or something. And, and for me to never, ever have been taught in my training that maybe they should hang around for a little bit, because they could have an immediate response to the amount of insulin I just gave them. But you just you don't you don't see that as a nurse, you don't know that as a nurse you. The hospital doesn't manage diabetes very well, either. You know, they're giving me cookies and crackers and things like that for snacks, fruit cups that are in sugary syrup. It just it really, really was astonishing to me, I'm not gonna lie. And I was on this big campaign of like, I'm going to revamp the nutrition system in the hospital. And I'm going to, you know, this is in my first few months of the diagnosis of course, now I realize I don't have time to, to battle that, but it's a much bigger political issue. But

Scott Benner 57:49
you're also at about what part of Canada you live in, because what kind of insulin did you get when you left?

Nicole 57:55
So I was started on Basal vlaar, which is Lantis for long acting, and then Novo rapid as part insulin for my fast acting, and I'm still on not

Scott Benner 58:06
there are places in Canada where they would give you regular an MPH.

Nicole 58:10
Yes, there is. And when I first started nursing, that's exactly what it was. And we were drawing them out of vials. And now the hospital's gone to pens.

Scott Benner 58:19
It's interesting. I mean, you're using a, there's a last generation of insulin being used still in parts of Canada and parts of America too, by the way, but yes, yes. That's, that's even fascinating. So yeah, tell me a little bit about well, actually, this is gonna sound really strange, Nicole, I have to call my mom. And then I'm going to ask you, yes. Okay, this doesn't normally happen in the middle of the podcast, but we're in our specific situation here. You're likely going to hear something that won't be in the show, but give me a second. She just tried to call me. Yes, ma'am.

Unknown Speaker 59:02
Okay, what are those things called?

Scott Benner 59:05
Well, wait, hold on one second. Did Bob get a hold of you? Yeah. Okay, so we did some we thought maybe it would be better for you to not have to go to the doctor tonight because of how tired you are. So we he cancelled the appointment and he has it set up for they're going to call. Let's see. He said they cancelled the appointment for tonight. The doctor is going to get a referral and call him back. So we're going to skip going to your general and just get the referral to the specialist.

Unknown Speaker 59:35
Okay. They say where this specialist is located or

Scott Benner 59:39
Bob's waiting for the phone call back to get the answer to that. Oh, okay. All right. So you should get ready for bed and get some the sleep okay.

Unknown Speaker 59:48
I can't, I can't get go in that bed. It's really constable and I was sleeping for about an hour. But then I woke up and had to go This bathroom, right? I got off but I couldn't get out there because it was the same as a couch is soft in the middle and you can't get out of it. Right. So you're

Scott Benner 1:00:10
gonna sit in your chair.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:12
I think that's what. Yeah, that's what I'm doing right now. sitting in the chair.

Scott Benner 1:00:17
All right, well, I just see I put yogurt and all kinds of food in there. I got you frozen meals. That will be easier. They have some carbs in them, but they're not bad. So I got like three dinners and a bunch of breakfast is bought more eggs though you didn't need them and I filled your refrigerator up with a lot of different stuff.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:36
Right? I saw it was filled. Okay, I didn't get a chance to see Oh, what was that?

Scott Benner 1:00:41
Did you look in the freezer as well? Yeah. Take a look in there. You think you could eat something? Probably. Yeah, I would try to eat something you have a drink with you.

Unknown Speaker 1:00:55
I have like a little bit of water. I have. I have a Gatorade. Sitting?

Scott Benner 1:01:00
Good. Let's let's pound that Gatorade down. Get it down. Okay. Okay. All right. What did you call that? What was your question?

Unknown Speaker 1:01:08
I want to know what the product was called that.

Scott Benner 1:01:12
Oh, I didn't that I didn't find so it's called eggs in a cup. If Bob's gonna run out for you tell him to text me and I'll tell them what it is. Okay, all right. All right. Get some deed I'm gonna call you in a little bit. Okay. Okay, honey. All right. Love you. Bye. Bye. Bye.

Nicole 1:01:32
She sounds adorable.

Scott Benner 1:01:33
I need to even tell her that she was on the podcast. I think legally, she's my mom. I don't have to worry about it. I mean, she's not gonna She sounds good. She's doing it. Listen, she's been asleep for like three hours in the last 36 hours. So she could be like, who knows? Just like he could be. I'm so sorry that I'd really that normally what happens when I'm making the podcast?

Nicole 1:01:56
But it just feels like a day at work? You know, it feels normal to me. Yeah.

Scott Benner 1:02:00
It's, it's, it was so nice to see the nurse who's probably about your age work with my mom last night. And she just caught me in the hallway. And she's like, this stuff happens to older people like it was so just like, it almost echoes what we're talking about. Because to her it was sort of like, Oh, don't worry, this happens. And to me, Ah, my mom's dying. You know what I mean? Like, he's totally right, give these two different perspectives. Not that a nurse? I mean, honestly, how could you be an effective clinician of any kind? If you were feeling everybody's tragedy on a personal level? Every 15? Yes, you can't do that. But so what happened? So in your opinion, the lack of knowledge from nurses and doctors, what is the what was the harm to you as a type A newly diagnosed type one? What was their lack of knowledge? How did their lack of knowledge harm you?

Nicole 1:02:56
You know, I? That's a really good question. How do I answer that? It, it really, basically left managing this disease with zero education. I'm walking out of the hospital with literally zero education. I did see a diabetic nurse, but there's one diabetic nurse for our whole hospital. And so she quickly came up and said, This is the insulin you're going to get started on and do you have benefits? Okay, perfect. You have extended benefits, so it should cover that and you'll have a follow up with us once you're discharged. And that was my diabetic consultation. So I immediately took charge. As soon as I was discharged home, I reached out to so many different resources. My sister is also she has her PhD in Clinical Psychology. And so and she's, she has one more year of internship and then and then she's ready to start working start to start her practice. So of course, she was very involved with a very close family and she immediately reached out to her resources and found this type one diabetic group for BC that for British Columbia that that supports mental health and it's basically like a peer support program. So I I immediately joined that. And my nursing friend who I actually went to nursing school with who is around the same age as me, she's been a type one since she was 16 years old. I immediately reached out to her and she actually became my you know what I joke as my personal diabetic nurse. I was able to message her call her at any time she put in my first libre glucose sensor because I was afraid to do that on my own. I sourced out all my own support and was able to get education through that, through those resources I find I found. But here I am being discharged when we give insulin in the hospital. It's a critical medication. And we have to do what's called a blind double check. So I dial up my insulin for what I think my patient needs based on their glucose, and I show my coworker what their glucose is, but I don't show them what I've dialed up the insulin to, and they're supposed to come to that same dosage that I came to, and then we both signed for the medication. So all of a sudden, I'm being discharged home having to give myself insulin and nobody's double checking it. Like it's just it's really, really unnerving. How many times you know how critical it is?

Scott Benner 1:05:49
How many times in a clinical setting? Did you dial up one thing? And the person you checked with disagreed with you? Oh,

Nicole 1:05:56
maybe twice in my career?

Scott Benner 1:05:58
Is that enough to make you scared personally? Yeah. was so silly, but I understand it. So. You have any just

Nicole 1:06:11
the exercise, just the movement? Scott? Nobody ever told me? Or did I ever read or ever know that after you give fast acting insulin. And I think this is fairly common amongst tight ones, the closer to giving that insulin that you move around, even just go for a simple walk, the more at risk you are for hypoglycemia. No one ever told me that. So here I am trying to do dishes, and I'm ending up on the floor sweating, thinking what's going on? And then I checked my blood sugar. And you know, you put two and two together. But I mean, really, carb counting, we don't carb count as nurses in the hospital. I know nothing about that. We just go by a scale on what that patient's blood sugar is and give their insulin according to that. So yeah, it really was shocking to me how much I didn't know.

Scott Benner 1:07:05
Well, what you said was that you created a group of people around you to help you. And yes, you had resources because of your nurse. But yes, but your resources still didn't help you that much, because you're sweating on the floor while you're doing dishes. And the bigger question to me is, what is everyone else supposed to do? Yes, it's you new people. Great

Nicole 1:07:26
question. What are you so this group that I that I joined? It's actually called the T one huddle group. For any listeners that are in British Columbia, it's run by Dr. Tricia Tang. And it's really such a wonderful group, we use whatsapp to message each other. And we just, there's an ongoing chat conversation, we can ask anything in the in the chat. And you've got a group of people here to support you from newly diagnosed to you know, going on 60 years with diabetes. And I was really lucky to have my friend who who had been type one for so long.

Scott Benner 1:08:06
Yeah. Have you ever seen the Facebook group that I put together for the podcast? The private? Yes, I

Nicole 1:08:11
think I think it did always it private.

Scott Benner 1:08:13
There's a private group, there's one that I just put up, like something's coming out, but there's a private one, that's exactly what you're talking about. Except it's, you know, whoa, at this point, like well over 14,000 people in there and like, like, like 11,000 of our active every day. It's,

Nicole 1:08:29
it's amazing, we really need this peer support. Because what I also found is that a lot of my clinicians, the diabetic nurses, my endocrinologist, the diabetic, nurse at the hospital, they don't have diabetes. So I mean, they have some level of education and understanding on it. But the lived experience is just night and day from being a clinician to actually having type one diabetes yourself.

Scott Benner 1:08:57
Yeah. Wow. That's really, I listen, I can't agree without enough. The idea of being able to talk to other people bounce ideas off them have a I mean, it takes a while to figure out who you can trust and who doesn't know what they're talking about. Yeah, but if you get a good if you get a good group, the people who don't know lay back a little bit, and they wait till they figure things out, like people don't say, I mean, at least in my group, you don't get a lot of people saying the like patently wrong thing. You know what I mean? Like, you don't hear like what color's the sky and they're like purple and they go wait a minute, you don't know. It's not it's not like that, like sometimes. Exactly, I think or I don't know, where in my experience, they use phrasing that helps you understand what their understanding is, which I think is also really valuable. But I've said it a million times here like I started this group because listeners asked me to, and not because I wanted to and to be perfectly honest, like being the moderator of a Facebook group is not exactly high on my to do list you No things I ever wanted to be involved in. But yes, it remains like, it's one of the things I'm proud of. It's really interesting

Nicole 1:10:09
to watch. Yeah, and you should be. Because just just the need and I mean, it's, it's no different in the States than it is in Canada, the need to have that peer support. I'm telling you this last year of my life, if I did not have that peer support would have been so much different. And the other thing is that I have a regular counselor, clinical counselor that I had seen over the years. But I quickly found out that there isn't actually a psychologist or a registered clinical counselor, that is a type one themselves in BC. So I actually, and I don't even know if I should say this, but I'm going to anyway, I actually through my sister found a clinical psychologist out of Toronto, Canada, who is a type one herself. So she specializes in type one, therapy, and and how important that was to actually do a zoom call and see her drinking an orange juice or an apple juice while I'm on while she's counseling me, I can't tell you the connection that that creates. You know, and I and I, you know, quickly, once it got over the hump, went back to my my regular counselor that I just see the odd time when I need to. And she still even apologizes that she doesn't know anything about type one diabetes, so she can try to understand, and she can try to relate as much as she can, but it's just not there.

Scott Benner 1:11:38
I've had a number of therapists on the show, who also have type one, and I find my conversations with them to be really enjoyable. And yeah, they have a it's obvious different insight they have they have real world training in talking to people about troubles. And at the same time, they have a deeper understanding of type one because they live with it. And I mean, the regular therapist can help you but I mean, I mean, I'd rather have an ex pro teach me how to pitch than a guy who's just theorizing, you know, like so. Great analogy. Yeah. I mean, somebody somebody really knows the the ins and outs and pitfalls and things that other people just would never know about. I mean, your whole story is a I mean, is an example of that. Right? Like, you know, you think you have people there who know what they're talking about. And they just they there's no way for them to and that leaves you with a lot of deficits, then. Yeah. It's not their fault. Like we talk and joke and mess around all the time about doctors not really understanding type one diabetes and everything. But it's like, how could they?

Nicole 1:12:44
Yeah, well, it's not in their training. And the nutrition that goes with it isn't either, because I reached out to one of my friends who was a doctor at the hospital that I worked at, and, you know, told her what my a one C was when I was diagnosed, which was 11, by the way, and I've gotten it down to 5.7. But, you know, I went for a walk with her one day. And I said, Well, I'm going to have Bolus for my lunch, and then I'll go for a walk with you. And she didn't even really understand that concept. And to think of how many years they spend in training, and she didn't even know that basic concept of type one diabetes, it just really fascinated me. It makes me angry at the same time, but it really fascinated me.

Scott Benner 1:13:29
Yeah, but I mean, how could she really know? Unless she would live with it?

Nicole 1:13:34
Yeah, yeah. And, you know, I guess, type one diabetes is a specialty that goes to an endocrinologist and I know that family physicians, General, practitioners can't know everything about every disease. Right? So I do understand that part. But I think type one diabetes, from what I've heard over the last year, I think, may be coming. More and more people diagnosed with it. They're They're almost saying that they're seeing this post COVID in some individuals and people are getting diagnosed later in life, because I found that really fascinating about myself as well. Like, why me? Why it 37 Yeah, like, how did that happen? But and, and my personal opinion on that is that, obviously, it was born with a genetic predisposition to have type one diabetes, and the stress of working through a pandemic, ultimately, again, in my own opinion, is what brought out my disease. Because I had no viral infection I had I had no nothing like that happened leading up

Scott Benner 1:14:42
to it. Yeah, but you did say you were panicked about COVID.

Nicole 1:14:46
I have never felt that kind of stress in my life. And I think that was very taxing on my immune system.

Scott Benner 1:14:51
Yeah. You might have ended up being one of those ladies that gets it at 60 years old or something like that, at that.

Nicole 1:14:56
I could have very well could have thought I do believe that Yeah,

Scott Benner 1:15:00
it's interesting. It's I mean, I don't want to say fun, but it's, it's, it's interesting to muse about and wonder about out loud, like, you know what, what it is that, you know, kind of pushed you over the edge like that.

Nicole 1:15:13
I know, I wish there was a test for it, but you know, we'll never know. You can just kind of theorize.

Scott Benner 1:15:20
And yeah, type one in your family or other. How about like celiac thyroid? I don't know stuff like that in your family bipolar, anything like that in the line.

Nicole 1:15:32
So no type one. I have grandpa who is type two. I'm on my maternal side. And my father, and I think his mother have hypothyroid. So at the same time as getting type one, excuse me, I quickly realized my thyroid function was poor as well. So I do have hypothyroidism as well that it basically went hand in hand within that first week of diagnosis.

Scott Benner 1:16:02
I had been waiting to get back to that because the brittle hair thing, the brittle hair thing was not the diabetes, and it wasn't the low iron. Nope. Yeah, that was definitely the thyroid.

Nicole 1:16:12
But it wasn't showing up on my TSH yet, which is really fascinating. Like, I wish I could talk at length with my endocrinologist like what about this? What about that? How does this work? How does that work? Because I clearly was sick for a couple of years. I clearly was but nothing really obvious was showing up in my lab work. So somehow, you know, my body was compensating for as long as it could let me

Scott Benner 1:16:37
run something off the flagpole here and see if anybody salutes okay. They're gonna tell you that in range for TSH some doctors is how you we don't treat till eight or 10. Right. Like, oh, until but I'm going to tell you that over two, you have thyroid issue.

Nicole 1:16:53
Yeah. And that that is really interesting. So I mean, I was like 2.63, or something like that when when I was in the hospital and and then quickly went to four point something and felt awful. For cold My me my hair was coming out and handfuls.

Scott Benner 1:17:11
What did they give you medication at? When did they finally say you have hypothyroidism?

Nicole 1:17:16
At four 4.6?

Scott Benner 1:17:18
I would say that they scan your thyroid to see if you have Hashimotos?

Nicole 1:17:22
No. And you know, I've never brought that up with my endocrinologist. But obviously I've learned about that on your podcast. I learned so many things on your podcast. I haven't had a chance to say that yet. I mean, it's just, it's incredible. You really are. You really are a celebrity in the type one world and I can't thank you enough for having this podcast. It was one of the first things I was told to start listening to buy a pure, pure type one.

Scott Benner 1:17:46
You can butter my bread in a couple minutes when we say yeah, just hold on a second like before that. Before that. I'm going to tell you Dr. Scott would have been given you a hormone replacement back with the hair. And yeah, the 2.6 a 2.6. Based on only what I've learned on this podcast and through my personal goings ons, with my family members, I 2.6. I would have said, Your hype if you have hypothyroidism and we're going to start you on a low level of Synthroid. Like I would I don't know how to choose it. But I would have figured it out like the amount I'm sure it's something to do with weight. We could have figured it out with Google. Anyway. I'm saying I'm saying you would have been there and done. Like

Nicole 1:18:27
you exactly, especially based on symptoms. Like it doesn't always have to be about lab values when you treat something.

Scott Benner 1:18:33
Yeah, if for everyone listening, thyroid related, treat the symptoms, not the test. Yes, please don't treat the number treat your symptoms. If you have this Yes. And you're 2.5 or 2.8 or 3.1 you have a thyroid issue, and just do it.

Nicole 1:18:50
That yeah, and fight for it. Like you Your doctor may not agree. But honestly, I am the lived experience of that and and you know, like in my hair in the last year. It's amazing how much thicker my hair has gotten. And I can see this like, you know, my best friend is my hairdresser. And we just we joke about it. You can see this line of where my hair started to grow back in and I mean, yeah, clinically I was I had a normal TSH, but I was suffering.

Scott Benner 1:19:20
Insulin is a hormone. Thyroid makes hormones. Your body is not good at dealing with hormones.

Nicole 1:19:26
It's not Yeah, yeah, I just learned that.

Scott Benner 1:19:30
Okay, well, I'm going to ask if there's anything we didn't talk about that we should have?

Nicole 1:19:36
No, I don't think so. I just my whole point for this podcast is just that if there are healthcare professionals listening I don't even know how to say it. But just I mean, I had a fasting glucose of 8.5 that definitely should have been followed up on but when you're in health care you you somehow like we were talking about at the beginning you feel invincible you feel like nothing is wrong with you. Um, but I think you need to be more open minded because I think we can be very narrow minded thinking nothing will happen to us. And and look where I ended up, right, I had the symptoms screaming in my face. So I think listening to what your body is trying to tell you is so important.

Scott Benner 1:20:25
When that doctor like, saw that number and let you go, do you think that was professional courtesy? Do you think if it wasn't you, the doctor would have pushed harder.

Nicole 1:20:35
He knew my level of phobia for needles. And you know, I don't think that it was right that he didn't push for it because he knew I was bothered by needles, I think he should have left it up to me and said, this needs to be followed up on whether you go or not as up to you, but I will write the order for a lab requisition that we need to repeat these labs, I think is what should have happened. His

Scott Benner 1:21:00
response was more like you don't like needles. Okay, forget it. Which just makes it dismissive and makes you feel like well, it must not be that big of a deal if he doesn't care.

Nicole 1:21:09
Exactly. Because even as a nurse, you still rely on your doctor to take care of you

Scott Benner 1:21:14
can tell you're Canadian, because if you were American, you'd be suing that guy. Yeah, no. I'm just teasing. Everyone stop being so litigious. It Okay, all right, that makes sense. Now, it's the part where you say great stuff about me. Where did

Nicole 1:21:31
ya know it? Honestly, it was.

Scott Benner 1:21:34
I feel stupid saying it. But I what I really meant was like, how did you find the podcast? And and if it's been valuable for you, can you tell me in what way?

Nicole 1:21:44
Yeah, so how I found the podcast was as soon as they joined our T one huddle group is what it's called. This, this gal who lives about four hours away from me, I kind of connected with her and she she was a year into her diagnosis just as I was diagnosed. So she just kind of she wrote me this really lovely email. And she basically just, you know, step one, you need to do this, which is, you know, apply for the disability tax credit. Step two, you need to contact your vehicle insurer, because they need to do a medical exam stuff like basically, these are all the things you need to do and in her list was, you know, the Juicebox Podcast is a really great resource. So while I was on medical AI, trying to sort out my insulin dosages and just learn my new life, I would go for walks every day, which is incredible at managing your blood sugar by the way, and and I would listen to your podcast and the bold with insulin, of course, I think this is a common thing. People love that series. I really became less and less afraid of insulin listening to your podcast, and definitely more motivated to have my blood sugar's low. Like in the beginning, you know, you're okay with having that. I closed my tablet here at 10 What would that be? That would be at 180. That's not good. So I think your podcasts and and you know, my my clinicians, they would say, Oh, that's great, like anything over 180 should be addressed. But you know, 180 is fine. Well, it's not fine. And being a registered nurse now I know that so I think your your podcast, it just it really helped to just better understand things.

Scott Benner 1:23:41
Yeah, yeah. So entertaining that your walks must have just whisked right by they did. Do you find me irritating, but the information so good, you just deal with it. I got an A review like that the other day, which by the way, if you're trying to hurt my feelings. I've been married for 25 years. You can't touch me. But it's, it's I love those are my feet actually being serious? I don't need a bunch of them. So please don't do this. But yeah, to hear that someone doesn't really like me, but listens to the podcast, because it's so valuable. warms my heart a little bit. Like it makes sure it makes me feel like wow, the information here is so good. They have to put up with me to get to Yeah. Yeah, by the way, other people seem to like my personality, but that not that everybody needs to or that I would expect everybody to, I would expect the exact opposite. But I'm just I honestly mean like without any sarcasm. If you found a podcast where you're like, Oh, I really don't like this host, but the content is so good. I'm going to listen to it anyway. That makes me feel really good about the content. It really does. Yeah, and it should yeah, I can't be for everybody. But no, exactly. That's not how the world works. I like it when I get like a bad review. And it's still a good review. When you read it like you read it. You're like well, yeah, oceans mad. They're like, but they still like it. That's interesting. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And well, no,

Nicole 1:25:02
I think you put a good spin on it. And I think that, that a lot of listeners would agree with that. And you you kind of normalize it and, and you have your experience with Arden and, um, you know, your your sense of humor does put a certain spin on this, I mean, it would be extremely dry if you weren't the holes. In my own opinion,

Scott Benner 1:25:20
let me tell you two things. First of all, I'm way funnier than this, I'm holding it back, because it's okay, if we just drilled down into the mania, that is my sense of humor, first of all, a lot of you would be put off. And secondly, you'd be like, I don't know what he's talking about, because my mind would just explode into weird directions. And I'd start piling on top. Basically, when you think I'm being amusing, I have a cap on myself trying to hold about 80% of my personality. And but I do also believe what you're saying that one of the reasons this all works is because it's not dry, and it's not boring. And it is conversational. And you know, for the people out there who like to say that I talk too much to you, I say, shut up. Because I don't mean it like that, because somebody has to drive the conversation. And chew, you don't realize, like, you know, once in a while I'll hear a critique from people and so that they know, I actually pay attention when I do the transcripts for the show. The transcripts tell me what percentage of the time I'm speaking versus what percentage of the time the other person, okay. And I speak usually about, it's usually about 6040. And if I stay right around 6040, I feel very good. If I get more 5050, then I'm like in a Dexcom thing where people are just spewing out information. And if I go much over 63%, even when I listen back, I think who I spoke a little too much today, like I can, I can feel that. But yeah, but you guys don't know that sometimes I interview people who, who, whose who still have something valuable to say, but it's not their inclination to speak and pontificate and go on. And if I don't keep prodding them with silliness, or questions, or etc, they'll just stop talking. Mm hmm. Oh, there

Nicole 1:27:10
was one podcast that I'm thinking of when you when you explain that. And I wish I could remember the title of it, but it was a young girl who was living the vegan life. Right? She was on a vegan diet. And she seemed very, very shy, although very sweet, very shy. And and I could see you trying to draw this information out of her. Right. So yeah, if you're, if you're not like that, that that podcast wouldn't have, you wouldn't have been able to post it really?

Scott Benner 1:27:42
No, it would just be silence. And then yeah, do so. And there's another, you know, and the other aspect of it is, is the is the entertainment value, like people are like, Oh, it's entertaining? Well, it's entertaining, because I say, you know, because I actually have ridiculous thoughts in the middle of people serious conversations. And then I say them out loud. And then people go, Oh, my God, why did he think of that? Like, what do you mean that this, the Gulf of California didn't know it existed? Of course, I'm looking at it. I'm 50 years old, I was like, I've never seen that before. So like, that kind of stuff makes it, it makes it real. And if somebody just does somebody made a dry conversation about type one diabetes, you wouldn't listen to 10 of them, and you'd be done. It's true, you know. So I appreciate people who I also think this, I think that I think that it could rub some adult type ones a little wrong, that I don't have diabetes. And let's just say I completely understand that. But sometimes when I hear from people, there's too much of the host, meaning like I'm giving my opinion too much. I think it would be important if I could meet those people, I would say to them, Listen, you know, if you've listened to the Pro Tip series are the defining diabetes episodes or any of that stuff. That's all that is, is that conglomeration of all of my knowledge about type one diabetes, so that while we're in a conversation, you and I, and you have type one, I don't, if I can still relate some experience I've had that's good for you like that would be valuable for you. I mean, I have to do that I can't just sit back and not relate to the person having a conversation. And if I have something that I think is valuable, interject, I hope people would have enough trust in me to know that I'm building. I mean, I'm building a podcast that is fairly popular. Like I'm not just talking to talk, I recognize sort of what needs to be said in that moment. But I do think that I do understand why it would maybe if I was a type one, and I was an adult, and I was listening to a conversation where somebody with type one and somebody without type one. Were speaking, I'd want to hear from the type one more myself. I understand why they might feel that way. But um, yeah,

Nicole 1:29:55
I do a little bit but you know, I don't know in your defense, um, How old was Arden when she was diagnosed to two? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, she doesn't know what's going on. You are still the lived experience of type one diabetes you you were managing 100% of her of her type one diabetes.

Scott Benner 1:30:18
And I've been specifically paying attention in a way that you have to admit is uncommon,

Nicole 1:30:23
so very uncommon, like when I started listening to your podcast and how you treat Arden's diabetes, she is so extremely lucky to have you had a father like you to be that involved. You know, I can see the benefit for for her, you know, delaying or possibly not having any chronic, like comorbidities from diabetes, because you were on it from the get go. That's the whole she's incredibly lucky. Oh,

Scott Benner 1:30:59
please. I was gonna call this episode hand stuff with Nicole, but which I feel like I'm gonna do but but now I might just call it Arden is lucky in that way. She might actually listen to this one day when she gets Yeah, she might well listen, it being serious. And in my own defense. I did an interview yesterday with a doctor who you know, you're gonna love his name's Dr. Addy Salviati. And when you when you hear it, he's brilliant about diabetes, like he really is. And yet, while he was talking, I thought he these are the things I've been saying for seven years on this podcast. Like he agrees with me. Like I didn't. I didn't say here's what I think. Do you agree with me? I let him say what he thought. And then I was thinking like, wow, that's exactly what I've said about that over and over again on this show, and made me feel good. Like, I was like, okay, my stuff is pretty solid. You know? It's yeah, you know, so if somebody hears me talking too much, I get it. Maybe I'm irritating to you, or whatever you want to hear from the person with type one, but I'm not just talking to talk. Although, listen, I record a lot of these. You got to cut me a break if once or twice, you know, a month I just like, start babbling away. Like you should try making 600 of these podcasts. Exactly. I mean, just say that it's free. Nicole, just say thank you like That's right. Every review should just say thank you stop critiquing me. I don't need this.

Nicole 1:32:23
Right? Yeah, there's always gonna be someone.

Scott Benner 1:32:26
I'm teasing. They're fine. I people's thoughts are really valuable. Like I yeah, I appreciate having them. But if I don't make fun of them again, we don't have a podcast, but I just Yeah, exactly. Thank you for your honest feedback. Wow. That's interesting. I gotta make it into something. We're talking here. Alright, let's Yeah, gotta get out of this. You you have been to delightful. You've taken up all my day. I am on a no sleep. Hi. That is I'm gonna crash very, very soon. I'm pretty sure. And and we might have heard from my mom if I decide not to edit it out. So big day. Yeah. Big day.

Nicole 1:33:02
Yes, well get some rest. I appreciate your time. With everything going on. And I and I really hope that things go well with your mom, you were

Scott Benner 1:33:10
really kind to put this off all day for me and, and help me out. I did a lot of very not fun things in the time between when we were supposed to record and when we got the start. So

Nicole 1:33:20
I can only imagine and I probably have a good idea of what that included. I'm assuming

Scott Benner 1:33:24
you were watching Netflix. But Canadian. Netflix is just like Big Comfy Couch and stuff like that. Right? Hey, real quick is big, comfy couch a Canadian thing? Well,

Nicole 1:33:36
it was a show that my sister watched when we were growing up. I don't know if I might have been a little old for it when it came out. But yeah, definitely. I definitely remember that show.

Scott Benner 1:33:48
So his Big Comfy Couch. And there's a reason I'm asking this. So if you're still listening, hang on for one second. It premiered on March 2 1992. In Canada and on January 9 1995. Us This is a Canadian TV show The Big Comfy Couch. There you go. Why did I ask you that? What was the idiom you used earlier, reshape

Nicole 1:34:11
it give my head a shake give

Scott Benner 1:34:13
my head a shake which by the way you realize is actually going to be the name of the episode right? Yeah, perfect. And when you google give my head a shake the first video return that comes back is a song called Give your head a shake on the Big Comfy Couch. And I saw that a couple hours ago while we were talking and that's what made me say that so Oh, I love that. Yeah, so give it by the way your Wi Fi Are you guys don't know it is you guys don't live that far from here. Why are you so different?

Nicole 1:34:43
That that seems like slang. Aren't you being

Scott Benner 1:34:47
ruled by a monarch or something like that or do I not understand?

Nicole 1:34:51
I think we are but I don't really understand that either.

Scott Benner 1:34:58
Oh, it would be so easy to take over the world nobody pays attention to me

first, I'd like to thank Nicole for coming on the show and sharing her story. Then I'm gonna thank touched by type one. Don't forget you can find them at Instagram, Facebook, or it touched by type one.org They really are doing amazing stuff. You should go check them out. Another thank you to Omni pod for sponsoring this episode of The Juicebox Podcast. Find out more about that free 30 day trial the Omni pod dash at Omni pod.com forward slash juicebox. And if you'd like to let on the pod know that you're interested in that on the pod five, it's Omni pod.com forward slash juicebox. Five

thank you so much for listening. I'll be back very soon with another episode of The Juicebox Podcast. If you're enjoying the show, please share it with someone who you think might also enjoy it.